Crown Royal Christmas Cookies
1 cup of water
Lemon juice
1 tsp baking soda
4 large eggs
1 cup of sugar
1 cup of nuts
1 tsp salt
2 cups of dried fruit
1 cup of brown sugar
1 1/2 cups Crown Royal

1. Sample the Crown to check quality.

2. Take a large bowl, check the Crown again to be sure it is of
the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.

3. Turn on the electric beater.

4. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.

5. Add one teaspoon of sugar....

6. Beat again.
(At this point it's best to make sure the Crown is still okay.
Try another cup, just in case.)

7. Turn off the mixerer thingy.

8. Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried
fruit.

9. Pick the frigging fruit off the floor.

10. Mix on the turner.

If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers,
just pry it loose with a drewscriver. (Sample the Crown for consistency.)

11. Next, sift two cups of salt, or whatever. Who giveshz a sheet.
(Check the Crown)

12. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table.
Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find.

13. Greash the oven. Turn the cake 360 degrees and try not to fall over.

Don't forget to beat off the turner.

14. Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the Crown
and make sure to put the stove in the dishwasher.

CHERRY MISTMAS Myrtle Beach Dude (Danny)