What are the responsibilities and benefits of marriage?

When you are married and a spouse dies without a will, the surviving spouse retains ownership of all property and debt – that’s a law tied to marriage.

Children born to a married heterosexual couple are assumed to be a product of that union and both parents assume responsibility for raising the children, no matter what else happens between the married couple.

A child of a married couple is next in line for inheritance should both parents die or if one dies and the other is incapacitated.

In a marriage, it’s easier to get health insurance for your spouse and family, and unless you have a ‘significant’ investment in another person’s life – as in a marriage – it’s difficult to take out life insurance for another person.

When a spouse becomes disabled and requires constant care, the healthy spouse can easily become the POA and take care of financial and health care issues for the disabled spouse.

If a spouse dies, the survivor is entitled to certain survivor benefits, like social security benefits.

Although Obama required hospitals to give visiting privileges to same-sex partners, there was nothing about making life or death decisions – but in a marriage (without a legal POA) the spouse has priority in making such decisions.

If you are not married and your partner is in the military, you cannot receive many benefits that are otherwise offered to married couples – that includes being able to join your partner when they are assigned to non-combat zones and any death or veteran benefits.

Those are just a few of the laws tied to marriage (there are over 1000 of them).


What is the benefit of civil marriage to society?

If the society can make the idea of a long term commitment between two people an attractive venture, (by offering hundreds of benefits) then those who marry will be responsible for at least one other person in the community.

It is more likely that children will have the support of at least two people whether they stay together or not, and the longer the relationship remains monogamous, the less chance there is of children being born outside the union that would detract from the financial stability of the married couple – and of course, less promiscuity for the transmission of STDs.

When people marry they want a better community for their spouse and family, so they are more likely to become involved with social and political issues – and that’s good for everyone.

Marriage is important in many societies – historically (and even today) marriage serves as a mechanism for the distribution of wealth.

As long as we place value on property and money, and as long as we are the strongest of all individualist countries marriage will be important to our society as a legal mechanism for the distribution of wealth and to forces 'individuals' to be responsible for at least one other life.

What is a Power of Attorney?

A Power of Attorney is a legal document which gives another person (your agent) the authority to make property, financial and other legal decisions for you. It is possible to make the legal authority to act in your name very broad or very limited. A common example of a limited Power of Attorney is to handle a specific transaction, like a house closing.


I think adults have many options towards the same end,,,

Yay!! A response to my actual question!



Thank you, that was VERY enlightening.

You're very welcome. There is more however - particularly with regards to the idea of keeping marriage out of civil law.

Our system of ‘re-distribution’ (entitlements, grants, and social and welfare programs, etc) both Federal and State levels are heavily dependent on the current system of family as defined by marriage.

For example, college students often cannot qualify for certain grants or school funding because their parents income & property is too high. This is a necessary gage so that funds will be available to those whose parents could not afford higher education. Without ‘marriage’ there would be no way to determine whose financial need is greatest.

That’s just one example but take that all the way down to community non-profit agencies trying to determine whose need is the greatest. In the redistribution system, we base fairness on a level of income and we particularly use marriage or proof of paternity (or maternity) or guardianship, in order to determine income or wealth.

So, for example – if a man owns much property and practices polygamy and some of his wives farm the land, while others have minimum wage jobs. Say he has 45 children and the man suddenly dies??

Who inherits the land or any debt the man might owe? Who supports the children when a woman’s income cannot? How long and costly do you suppose this case might be in a court of law and who would pay?

In some states, the electric or gas utility offers help for families down on their luck, through social redistribution. Imagine a city faced with hundreds of new cases in which a ‘single’ parent has insufficient income to pay those bills - or the increase in the amount of need based assistance – all because our system of redistribution is based on determining the income of couples who have responsibility for the children either based on marriage or legal guardianship.

It’s actually a good system when marriage is an attractive venture. It works because marriage combines the resources of two individuals, which not only covers the needs of children in the family, but also creates a tax liability – which then becomes the redistribution to those who (for whatever reason) are raising children as a single guardian.

It’s because marriage between two individuals (two heads of household) offers so many benefits to society that it should be extended to same-sex couples. Currently, in the states that offer civil unions to SS couples, there is still the issue of adoption. Yes, it can be solved legally, but it is quite costly and can take years. In the mean time both the family and society are left without coverage.

Marriage in terms of ‘two individuals, rather than one of each sex, makes more sense. That couple is more likely to have a family, to be concerned and serve an active role in supporting their community. And children added to the family would be added in the same way that married couples add children today.

I really appreciate you taking the time to write all that and explain some things to me.