(just something i have kicked around for the last 30 minutes or so)


the first ten were filled with confusion,
fear and the unsettling realization
that the world has turned me into something
other than myself.

the old me, the real me,
would have exited this bridge
from the opposite end that I entered,
not the middle,
not like this.

eleven through twenty were not much different
than the first ten feet.
I had never given it much thought,
but the under-side of the bridge, with its tidy steel
and flat paint, looked sterile and dismal.
even through the wind smeared tears
and my mind battling
thousands of fragmented thoughts,
I was able to draw a comparison
to my own existence.

from twenty one to twenty five,
all thoughts went to those I’d left behind.
I imagined how terribly disappointed they will be,
but quickly realized, they probably already are.
twenty six,
twenty seven,
twenty eight,
it was at this point I started to think about the commuters
and the ones that will be sent to clean the mess.
the mess?
oh yes,
there will be quite a mess.

twenty
nine
feet

thirty through thirty seven, I asked for forgiveness.
I didn’t really think how I would interrupt all of your lives.
sir, I’m sorry you will have to miss
your son’s game today.
lady in the Accord,
please don’t let your kids look
as you drive slowly passed.
children shouldn’t see such things.
I’m sorry people
I’m sorry

in a couple of days
you will be able to pass under
this bridge without even the
slightest thought of today,
just as you always have.

the traffic below
is coming to a stop as people
watch in horror.
my descent
and ultimate demise,
is approaching quickly
at about 32ft. per second.
I have a new understanding of
the phrase,
terminal velocity.

thirty eight feet from my last first step;
my life is being shown to me.
it’s not like you imagine,
it is more like a scrambled
sequence of recollections,
floating by on thousands of
broken pieces of stained glass.
each one illuminated by a
simple memory.
it amazes me how the mind can
project and sort so many images
in such a short amount of time.
forty feet

forty one to sixty…
doubt sets in,
all the things I thought I knew,
I now question.
all the things I never believed in,
I now question.
it’s too late,
I can’t stop this.
I don’t want to stop it.
what if I live?
no, no way,
surely a seven story fall is enough
to end my story.
sixty one
heaven?
sixty two
hell?
sixty three
my mind needs to stop
four, I wish I would have said goodbye
five, no, that would have been mean
sixty six, nothing,
a box in the ground, that will be my resting place.

sixty seven
sixty eight
n
i
n
e
the last thing I heard was the screeching of tires.
a calm has come over me,
I don’t even hear the wind speeding by.

seventy feet now
why cant I hear
I don’t want to hear

seventy one
I know no one will understand this.
I haven’t shed a tear in
thirty two feet.
I guess I’m just waiting for the finality
that comes when
teeth and bone
are set in concrete.

seventy two feet
no bounce,
black.

My goodness that is powerful (((KC)))

haha...hi vic
thanks for putting up with this one...

you're thanking me???


silly! it should be the other way around!! this was an amazing write and i'm glad i came in tonight and found it!

you've been missed!!

This write brings many scenarios to my mind that I have witnessed in my lifetime...Massive write kc, and your voice is still strong and vivid in my minds ears..

but vic, i always thank people for taking their time...

different, yes
amazing I’m not so sure about. again, thank you

i hope they have a way out of your mind as well.

maybe i will record this one...i don't know???

thank you

...RECORD IT...

Edited because I forgot to add..I'll keep your voice in my mind, I like how it reads your writes to me...

how can i say no to that?

several things came to mind when i read this

initially i thought it was going to be about age
then perhaps about people who jumped from the WTC towers
my final thought after reading was that
we all jump in a way
we all find the ground in the end

Excellent write.....

great write KC!

really enjoyed!

very true s1ow
'jumping' has many meanings

thanks up2, j
i appreiciate you stopping by

2kids, that pic freaks me out...

It was moving. Frightening, thought provoking and haunting.

Wow! Incredible. I was really moved.