Topic: Question for the ladies
no photo
Sat 06/08/13 10:24 AM
Was wondering...

Ladies are doing very well these days if I should mussure success & progress by education, careers,investments, financed, cars etc...
We're more previladged than our mothers were back in their days, & exposed to so much information/awereness than they were.

Do you think our indipendancy & exposure to information has a negetive impact on relationships' that we're in? (marriages in particuler)

Our mothers(most of elder ladies) stayed in their marriages (I know that it takes both parties to make a relationship work.

Our mothers were not as educated as we Are (only a few of them)
Not as successful as we are in many ways, but there's something they did right in submission, since they're still committed inspite of the issues they go through & yet young couples somehow fail to make it work wether in marriages or casual relationships'

Hope I didn't offend anyone, since its just a general question.
Share your idea on this ladies please....

Becca.iw's photo
Sat 06/08/13 01:07 PM
its a very good point, but i think that nower days its not because of the educational / industrial or intelligence level of different that makes the different its the fact that back in the day our families had respect and dedication now days it is o too easy to find and easy girl, and i think the most successful relationships these days are the ones that both parties are working, and respect each other everyone needs there independents and there own rights to live there life how they see and feel fit, so its not down to ''success & progress by education, careers,investments, financed, cars etc.''

:)

Toodygirl5's photo
Sat 06/08/13 05:32 PM

Many couples had dedication years go, and some do today. However, now days many couples lack respect and dedication in a marriage. I do not think it has to do with women having a better education and jobs outside the home, I believe it is a breakdown of communication, respect, and morals of one spouse or both parties.

Now a days mismanagement of Finances break up more couples than extra marital affairs.

no photo
Sat 06/08/13 06:30 PM
And let's not forget that divorce, back then, also went against the church in some beliefs. So it was "Married for Life" whether it was working or not.
Many couples also stayed together "for the kids" and once the kids were grown many opted to stay put as it was easier than try to go out on your own at that point.
More thoughts for conversation.

helpinneed's photo
Sat 06/08/13 07:55 PM
There is no doubt that "Married For Life" was imposed on generations of people.

msharmony's photo
Sat 06/08/13 07:59 PM

Was wondering...

Ladies are doing very well these days if I should mussure success & progress by education, careers,investments, financed, cars etc...
We're more previladged than our mothers were back in their days, & exposed to so much information/awereness than they were.

Do you think our indipendancy & exposure to information has a negetive impact on relationships' that we're in? (marriages in particuler)

Our mothers(most of elder ladies) stayed in their marriages (I know that it takes both parties to make a relationship work.

Our mothers were not as educated as we Are (only a few of them)
Not as successful as we are in many ways, but there's something they did right in submission, since they're still committed inspite of the issues they go through & yet young couples somehow fail to make it work wether in marriages or casual relationships'

Hope I didn't offend anyone, since its just a general question.
Share your idea on this ladies please....


I think the CULTURE has evolved to be more about the individual and less about the family

that has affected commitments for men and women, it has obliterated 'roles' as they were once understood, and made more of an environment of confusion and competition in relationships as opposed to partnership ,,,


our marriage still ends up too often about 'us' and not about our family as a UNIT,,,,

1Cynderella's photo
Sat 06/08/13 08:22 PM
I think progress often comes in the form of a double edged sword. Women becoming more educated and independent natured certainly provided self resource as a means of escaping abusive and controlling marriages, where before, fewer options were available. The more accepted a thing becomes in society, the more commonly it's practiced. The more commonly a thing is practiced the value of it's true purpose depreciates into something to be utilized for whatever the trend of the times may be; which in my opinion is selfish, lazy, manipulative and sometimes even spiteful, easily gained escape from the responsibility of a marriage and even an entire family unit.

no photo
Sun 06/09/13 05:31 PM
And here we are on a dating site... oops

:laughing: rofl :laughing:

msharmony's photo
Sun 06/09/13 06:40 PM
:wink: dating sites are also social sites and networking sites

many reasons people use them besides to find a date,,,just saying,,,

no photo
Sun 06/09/13 09:14 PM
"Competition in relationships' as opposed to partnership"

Wow how true is that....

I agree with you msharmony.

helpinneed's photo
Mon 06/10/13 07:31 AM

"Competition in relationships' as opposed to partnership"

Wow how true is that....

I agree with you msharmony.


Partners in:
raising the kids
attention to each others needs
partners in finances
partners in living environment
partners in education
partners in planning
partners in business
partners in social needs

Now that is an interesting concept if it can be applied to marriages in the future. Was there a time period in the past where it was more prevalent? Like years of the depression, farming families, small communities etc. I like it and think it is very important concept that is unique for happiness in a family and individuals. As said a family unit. Wow! Great job. Definitely would be my advice to couples before a marriage. Sounds very logical and inclusive of all. Now there is a book to write on this topic, but can it be put in a approach that a common person,the average joe can understand, so that the whole world can gain the benefits?

no photo
Mon 06/10/13 08:17 PM
Sure why not...

If one can write a book about relationships/marriages & how to live a balanced life (being progressive & indipendant without threatening the relationship) I'd defenately buy that book & read it with my partner, so both parties benefit from it.

no photo
Mon 06/10/13 08:42 PM
our society and our roles within our social organizations are changing and evolving and that is not going to stop. It can be instructive, insightful and just plain fun to look back sometimes at where we have come from to see how far we have come. The important view lies in the path ahead. Todays confusions stem from learning how to balance new roles and expectations; not because there is anything wrong with those roles and new patterns, opportunities. And, not because people are bad as disrespectful people have always been with us; even in traditional times.

Just because something is new and creates a present adjustment problem does not mean it is bad. What it is is an opportunity to create a new equilibrium. When many women first entered the work force, child care was a huge challenge and tho it still has it's fair share of challenges, it is much easier today to find a number of options than it was when my children were young 20+ yrs ago. We look at how far we have come.

Same with relationships. As women become breadwinners men also have an opportunity to become invested in their child rearing capacity or to enjoy cooking - once a woman's province. a marriage, with the right attitude, can now truly be an equal partnership when the partners have the skills to negotiate roles. more happiness is possible with true equality than with a domineering partner who thinks he/she is Miss Bossy the Cow/Bull

just a few thoughts...