Why is that I hear people (in real life and on these threads) say someone has "baggage" if they have been married before or have kids???? Im sorry but to me...i feel that this is sooooo insulting..... KID's are NOT baggage...maybe EX's are....LOL...but KIDS are an extension of a person and should'nt be considered "baggage"!

P.S. Just wanted to share my two cents....please remember I am NOT pinpointing anyone ok????

thank you Ms Teddybear....LOL..

i completely agree

How about...

"There are my well-intentioned off-spring"



Well...what term do you suggest we use then?

how about "my kids" or "pride and joy"

All i can say, is at the first hint that a man feels like this, I run far and fast!!! I never entertain the idea that they will fall in love with my kid and we will live happily ever after!!
If they say it they mean it and I cannot change them

No...we are talking about someone else's "stuff" they bring into a relationship.

Alternative terms for "baggage".

If you can still pick them up by the back of their belt with one hand...they could look like baggage...lol Just kidding. I agree kids aren't bags but they can be a downer if they don't accept you into the family and always screamYou're not my real dad when they get upset. I know a guy that went through this. It's VERY hard to take.

if someone called my kids baggage
guess who would go
and how fast





nope, to late

I look at it like this in a relationship...if u dont want my kids, then u don't want me either. Its a package deal.

My two cents, everyone has "baggage" whether they be kids, bad past relationships, unhappy childhoods, past or present addiction problems, whatever. Expecting anyone over the age of 2 not to have stuff from their past is completely and totally unrealistic. What counts is how well you carry your baggage or whether you expect someone else to carry it for you!

Peace all,
Suz

P.S. I just picked up my "baggage" from the airport after his being gone for a week. I'm incredibly happy and feel my sense of balance coming back!

I agree
children are not baggage
but they are part of the package when you date someone that has children
just my 2 cents...

Everyone uses "baggage". It seems easier to group our "past" into that category. It could pertain to many things and issues of our lives. I personally can't stand that word. As a good friend one told me, "we all have baggage. Just depends on how you pack it". (he's a therapist)

My "baggage" are nine beautiful children and to hell with anyone who thinks they are any less than the best packages of my life.

Kids are not baggage, nor will they ever be, and anyone who considers or even refers to kids as baggage are just idiots.

That said, there is such a thing as emotional baggage that men and women do carry with them from one relationship to the next that can be VERY undesirable.

I hate it when, just because I'm male, it's assumed I'm a liar or a cheat, which I am neither. The same goes with male views towards stereotypical womens issues.

Just my 2 cents,

Scott

Scott - you look an awful lot like Ray Liotta!

Are you twins???

Yes we all have "baggage" but i just hate to hear "oh you have baggage then!" from a man when they ask if i have kids....i hear ya that "emotional problems" can be "baggage" because yes...our pasts are carreid with us wherever we go....but please people....do not call OUR KIDS baggage....just our ex's...lol

Wha I thought they meant by 'baggage' is: Having unsettled issues that would interfere with an attempting relationship they are seeking.
For eg the children's parent having to come to spend time right there now where you both are.
(2) They still have to be attending Court to pursue the settling of issues with EX.
(3) They haven't kicked a drug or drunk habit yet while saying that they are trying to.
(4) They STILL have criminal matters pending in Court.
(5) They have to leave to spend days or weeks away from you on some matters like course, or children visit.
(6They are still with sex partner they cant let go which they intend to KKEP on the side.

There are some things I may not recognize or can't remember which others can. These things will or MAY, weigh down a relationship, as it were, and RETARD it's progress. SO THEY CALL IT BAGGAGE.

The children themselves, are not the baggage except like one on drugs, another is disrespectful to you, another will dirty and won't clean, another won't let you spend time with your NEW spouse, another giving trouble at school. .....

But if it is the MAN comming with that, is BAGGAGE; if it is the WOMAN, then it is: "If you love the cat, you have to take care of the kittens."

Grieveing...I hear ya too...but my post was referring to people calling other kids "baggage"....I dont care what kids do...(argue, fight, etc)whatevers....KIDS are kids and i know that they do sometimes make it hard on their parents when a new "person" comes along.....but kids act that way because they may feel threatened with the "new" relationship and they may be scared of "possibly" being abandoned....but anyway thats not the point...i just wanted to vent and say that "KIDS ARE NOT BAGGAGE!"...no matter what...

"KID's are NOT baggage..."

No they are not. You are completely right.

And yes, Bay Area Girl, I get that allot.

Errr...yea, Yea, thats right we're twins! That's my story and I'm sticking to it!