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Topic: I'm so bummed :(
EtherealEmbers Joined Sun 02/03/08 Posts: 6580	Fri 02/22/08 11:42 PM
I've been talking to someone that's called me every night for 5 days in a row... we've had conversations for hours... I asked him how long it'll be before he thinks we can meet and he tells me, "very soon..." I comment on his vague answer jokingly, and then he says, "as soon as possible..." He doesn't call tonight until a few minutes ago, and then asks me if I want to meet for coffee at Denny's or something... I said no, because I'm going to church in the morning and don't think it's wise to meet guys in the middle of the night. I joked to him about how I think he just did that because he knew I'd say no, but he insisted he had good intentions and he was just busy today. So now I'm all bummed, and feeling lame... and on top of that, now he thinks I'm not spontaneous. Any thoughts/suggestions/feedback?

hikerchick Joined Sat 12/22/07 Posts: 13206	Fri 02/22/08 11:45 PM
I've been talking to someone that's called me every night for 5 days in a row... we've had conversations for hours... I asked him how long it'll be before he thinks we can meet and he tells me, "very soon..." I comment on his vague answer jokingly, and then he says, "as soon as possible..." He doesn't call tonight until a few minutes ago, and then asks me if I want to meet for coffee at Denny's or something... I said no, because I'm going to church in the morning and don't think it's wise to meet guys in the middle of the night. I joked to him about how I think he just did that because he knew I'd say no, but he insisted he had good intentions and he was just busy today. So now I'm all bummed, and feeling lame... and on top of that, now he thinks I'm not spontaneous. Any thoughts/suggestions/feedback? he is clearly an ass

Woodrow Joined Tue 01/15/08 Posts: 212	Fri 02/22/08 11:46 PM
how is he a ass?

EtherealEmbers Joined Sun 02/03/08 Posts: 6580	Fri 02/22/08 11:46 PM
lol he's so not an ass...

hikerchick Joined Sat 12/22/07 Posts: 13206	Fri 02/22/08 11:46 PM
going out in the middle of the night to meet strangers is not spontaneous; it is ridiculous. It is insane. If he says you are not spontaneous because of that he has some screws loose.

hikerchick Joined Sat 12/22/07 Posts: 13206	Fri 02/22/08 11:47 PM
how is he a ass? he called her in the middle of the night to go meet him when he knew she would have to say no. he is an ass.

IndnPrncs Joined Sun 11/04/07 Posts: 58420	Fri 02/22/08 11:48 PM
I know it may not be comforting but I think you did the right thing.. Some people play games while expressing they have nothing but good intentions.. Some could and perhaps he just felt spontaneous and got the guts to call you and say that b/c he's shy.. It's hard to tell.. but don't feel lame.. It will run the course it is meant to and "if" he is worthy of you he will prove it.. I sure hope he does but let him do it.... You had good reason to not go and to question his intentions/reasons... JMHO

Woodrow Joined Tue 01/15/08 Posts: 212	Fri 02/22/08 11:48 PM
I used to work graveyard and always went out after midnight, not weird just different schuldes thats all.

FearandLoathing Joined Fri 12/28/07 Posts: 30121	Fri 02/22/08 11:48 PM
going out in the middle of the night to meet strangers is not spontaneous; it is ridiculous. It is insane. If he says you are not spontaneous because of that he has some screws loose. In such a public place like Denny's? Really now, come on...

hikerchick Joined Sat 12/22/07 Posts: 13206	Fri 02/22/08 11:49 PM
going out in the middle of the night to meet strangers is not spontaneous; it is ridiculous. It is insane. If he says you are not spontaneous because of that he has some screws loose. In such a public place like Denny's? Really now, come on... it's not the place, it's the time. People who have to get up in the morning tend not to do their socializing in the middle of the night. why can't he meet her at a normal hour?

Woodrow Joined Tue 01/15/08 Posts: 212	Fri 02/22/08 11:50 PM
how is he a ass? he called her in the middle of the night to go meet him when he knew she would have to say no. he is an ass. If he asked her out knowing she would so no then his a woman, I would skip some sleep to meet some nice.

EtherealEmbers Joined Sun 02/03/08 Posts: 6580	Fri 02/22/08 11:51 PM
going out in the middle of the night to meet strangers is not spontaneous; it is ridiculous. It is insane. If he says you are not spontaneous because of that he has some screws loose. lol he didn't say I'm not spontaneous, he just asked me, "I thought you were spontaneous..." and I said, "not that much..." I told him it was inappropriate to ask me this late, and he said it was okay. He is in law enforcement and he's not a jerk... he's actually one of the nicest guys I've talked to.. perhaps I should've given more background so I didn't paint him to look like a jerk... cuz he's not...

CrazyPalindrome Joined Tue 11/27/07 Posts: 736	Fri 02/22/08 11:51 PM
Guys just don't realize how scary it is sometimes for us to go out in the middle of the night, especially alone, to meet someone you haven't met in person yet. If he comes up with something like this, suggest bringing friends, and get a group to go, so you won't be alone, and it won't be as awkward, because there will be more people there. Good luck!

hikerchick Joined Sat 12/22/07 Posts: 13206	Fri 02/22/08 11:52 PM
how is he a ass? he called her in the middle of the night to go meet him when he knew she would have to say no. he is an ass. If he asked her out knowing she would so no then his a woman, I would skip some sleep to meet some nice. didn't quite catch all that you said but I got the skipping sleep to meet someone nice part. How does she know he is nice? if he was nice, he wouldn't ask her to skip sleep. He would meet her in the daytime like a normal person.

Woodrow Joined Tue 01/15/08 Posts: 212	Fri 02/22/08 11:53 PM
going out in the middle of the night to meet strangers is not spontaneous; it is ridiculous. It is insane. If he says you are not spontaneous because of that he has some screws loose. lol he didn't say I'm not spontaneous, he just asked me, "I thought you were spontaneous..." and I said, "not that much..." I told him it was inappropriate to ask me this late, and he said it was okay. He is in law enforcement and he's not a jerk... he's actually one of the nicest guys I've talked to.. perhaps I should've given more background so I didn't paint him to look like a jerk... cuz he's not... Cops useally have weird hours, will probally get lots of these calls.

EtherealEmbers Joined Sun 02/03/08 Posts: 6580	Fri 02/22/08 11:53 PM
I know it may not be comforting but I think you did the right thing.. Some people play games while expressing they have nothing but good intentions.. Some could and perhaps he just felt spontaneous and got the guts to call you and say that b/c he's shy.. It's hard to tell.. but don't feel lame.. It will run the course it is meant to and "if" he is worthy of you he will prove it.. I sure hope he does but let him do it.... You had good reason to not go and to question his intentions/reasons... JMHO that's what I'm hoping...

hikerchick Joined Sat 12/22/07 Posts: 13206	Fri 02/22/08 11:53 PM
going out in the middle of the night to meet strangers is not spontaneous; it is ridiculous. It is insane. If he says you are not spontaneous because of that he has some screws loose. lol he didn't say I'm not spontaneous, he just asked me, "I thought you were spontaneous..." and I said, "not that much..." I told him it was inappropriate to ask me this late, and he said it was okay. He is in law enforcement and he's not a jerk... he's actually one of the nicest guys I've talked to.. perhaps I should've given more background so I didn't paint him to look like a jerk... cuz he's not... well then he will ask you again at an appropriate time, one hopes. Being spontaneous doesn't mean being crazy.

JMEEGE27 Joined Sun 01/13/08 Posts: 211	Fri 02/22/08 11:54 PM
how is he a ass? he called her in the middle of the night to go meet him when he knew she would have to say no. he is an ass. If he asked her out knowing she would so no then his a woman, I would skip some sleep to meet some nice. didn't quite catch all that you said but I got the skipping sleep to meet someone nice part. How does she know he is nice? if he was nice, he wouldn't ask her to skip sleep. He would meet her in the daytime like a normal person. Agreed..

FearandLoathing Joined Fri 12/28/07 Posts: 30121	Fri 02/22/08 11:55 PM
how is he a ass? he called her in the middle of the night to go meet him when he knew she would have to say no. he is an ass. If he asked her out knowing she would so no then his a woman, I would skip some sleep to meet some nice. didn't quite catch all that you said but I got the skipping sleep to meet someone nice part. How does she know he is nice? if he was nice, he wouldn't ask her to skip sleep. He would meet her in the daytime like a normal person. Normal people? I'm only awake at night, because I work a lot of 2nd shifts at work and sleep most of the day go to work, rinse, lather, repeat. I don't think it is fair to label someone because of their schedule, much better to label someone after you know them personally me thinks. Personally your reason is good, you'll be needing sleep to attend church, perhaps you didn't relay it to him as such?

CrazyPalindrome Joined Tue 11/27/07 Posts: 736	Fri 02/22/08 11:55 PM
Cops useally have weird hours, will probally get lots of these calls. Being a cop, at any hour of the day, should just mean that he should understand better that it might be dangerous. I was with 2 other people once, and we still got mugged. Life is unpredictable... there's a difference between spontenaity and stupidity. Take care of yourself!