Community > Posts By > princess4u2014

 
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Sat 03/15/14 04:10 PM
Thank you :) right now I haven't even looked at rushing into a relationship, I first need to be able to actually meet guys in person after only texting for weeks and months. I do want to get married though...even my LITTLE sister is engaged (nobody told me, because my whole family pities me and my lonely single mom situation, I found out about my sister's engagement 6mos after the fact via Facebook, how mortifying).

After I posted this stuff, I had another guy (one ive known since high school) cancel on me for a questionable reason. My best friend said I should be furious.

And the reason I took my pics down is because I divulged a boat load of super personal, super embarrassing info on this forum today so the last thing I need is people who know me in real life identifying me after reading my posts. I realize that not having a pic will hinder me from meeting guys on this site, but I dont care anymore because my experiences on this site and with the guys from the site have all been awful.

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Sat 03/15/14 02:19 PM
Edited by princess4u2014 on Sat 03/15/14 02:22 PM
Well, the real reason I don't have any good to come out of talking about that ex ie. because, quite frankly, it ended badly for me due to no real fault of my own other than perhaps being too loyal and too accommodating to the point that I was a doormat. Yeah that might be a major "flaw" in terms of how a dating guru like Rori Raye would perceive my ability to play the dating "game," and I realize now that being too available and too accommodating to a guy will lose his interest, but on the same token, being too loyal isn't something that's a "sin" nor does it show that I'd mistreat a guy. If anything, it shows that I am a nice girl with a big heart...too big of a heart sometimes.

The only other thing I did wrong was to develop nasty scars and stretch marks as a result of having a really bad kidney condition (look up nephritis, and the effects that a treatment med called prednisone has on skin). My ex never had sex with me after my kidney condition got out of hand and left me scarred. Even though I later got a lot better and lost the 50lbs of swelling--thus rereturning to my normally svelte figure--he never sexually touched me again. I believe this is because of the extreme scarring that the nephritis and prednisone left me with. So yeah it was a sexless relationship. I went through a huge period of involuntary celibacy--both while "dating" him and also after him--while he sl.utted around with other girls. If I admit this sh.it to guys, they will see me as a loser and a doormat that they will think they can cheat on or mistreat. The nice guys won't want to cheat on me, nah they'll just choose to go for a girl who doesn't have such self-disrespectful past dating experiences.

Admit it, my scenario involving my ex is really, really embarrassing.

Another reason my ex stopped sexing me is likely because he has a Madonna wh0re complex. Look it up on Wikipedia if you don't know what that is.

Other than that, my ex brought a lot of bad--both in the relationship and in general--onto himself. He chose to act in a destructive way, become a deadbeat, do a complete 180 from who his friends and I knew him to be, etc. None of his actions were my fault...it's even questionable to say that my scars causing him to "sexile" me were my "fault," since it's not like I was able to help having an incurable kidney condition (aside from a possible transplant that is). So yeah that "relationship" was a huge scam due to no real fault of my own yet it's still shameful to talk about because it makes me look like a doormat and an idiotic for "sure knowin how to pick em".

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Sat 03/15/14 12:44 PM
Ok I don't know how many times I need to say it -- I dont go on and on like this with the guys I talk to, this is just me having a major meltdown around people who either live far away, dont know me, or have already rejected me (so im not trying to impress anyone here). And I didn't bring up marriage at all on that date...he did, saying it was his goal. Then later he cited wanting marriage as why he wouldn't see me again since although he knows I have the same goal, he cant see himself marrying me. Yes all that after only one awkward date. And he only knew I wanted marriage because my profile here says "looking for a relationship with eventual marriage" not because I harped on it. Oh and I learned from dating gurus rori raye and patti stanger to never talk about exes on the 1st date yet he asked about my kids dad several times, before and during the date, and later told me he found it a red flag that I kept avoiding any talk about my ex.

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Sat 03/15/14 09:00 AM
And the reason I'm mad about this site is because the guy who stood me up, and the guy who didn't want date #2, and countless other game-playing jerks were guys I got in contact through all from THIS SITE!

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Sat 03/15/14 08:56 AM
I never brought up anything about marriage on a first date!!! That's the thing! The only clue he had was on my profile; stating I'm looking for a serious relationship leading to marriage. He told me in our text convos prior to meeting that he himself wanted marriage. Then a week after the date with no texts other than a few back and forth "hi"s, I asked if he'd be interested in meeting up again. He sent me a paragraph long text saying no thank you, sorry but he's really looking to get married, so he has to be picky and just doesn't see himself marrying me. HE talked about marriage not me!

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Sat 03/15/14 08:06 AM
I try to resolve the issue then when that doesn't work I complain in private to my best friend or on message boards. And I waited for guys to come to me but all that got me was a year and a half of involuntary celibacy and a few cobwebs up near my cervix. The logic of "lean back" makes sense theoretically but unfortunately it's backfired on me

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Sat 03/15/14 08:04 AM
I want both! A marriage that is sexually active (unlike my last relationship a few yrs ago, where the guy refused sex to me yet ****ed other girls because he has a Madonna wh0re complex). And with my failure rate I will probably go crazy soon. You sound like an insincere dick by thr way

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Sat 03/15/14 07:00 AM
Cause and effect. I didn't start whining until I got burned a number of times

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Sat 03/15/14 06:07 AM
After. Falling in love takes time and im sick of falling for someone who doesn'tfall for me. So I wall up mmy emotions until long after, I.e. when the guy tells me he loves me first. Yes Im jaded and hardened.

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Sat 03/15/14 06:03 AM
I can't even get laid. I'm stuck going through an involuntary sexless lent -- think the movie 40 Days 40 Nights but in my case giving up sex for lent isn't my choice. I also had sexless lents the last 3 yrs in a row (thankfully I wasnt celibate that whole time period but I did go through a year and a half of total sexual celibacy, not my choice, I was 60 lbs overswollen from nephritis and was physically handicapped from the excessive swelling in my legs).

I keep getting stood up. The farthest I got all year was an actual date, but I paid $65 for a sitter when im in huge debts, just to have the guy tell me he wouldn't be seeing me again because he wants marriage very soon and he doesnt see me to have marriage potential. Looking back, he wouldn't even go farther than a light kiss, pulled away when I tried to kiss goodbye. Oh and a while before that obviously unsuccessful date, I did meet a guy who I'd been talking to but he literally tried to grope me when my small child was in the same public area (oh heck no) and once I was alone with him he made it very obvious he was just looking for a quickie. I actually turned it down because I didn't feel like being a last minute cheap whore. He's a cop too. Oh and he never took me on an actual date either. But he's the closest ive gotten to a hookup in a while now. Every other guy has been totally frigid (where's the happy medium here??) or refuses to meet me or ditches out on me. The stand-ups are astronomically more frequent than the average girl gets...yes I looked up stats on it, because im a nerd and I had nothing better when I was stood up a few of those times.

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Sat 03/15/14 05:50 AM
He claims he wants marriage too though!!!! And im turning 32 and never even given a ring...any girl in my spot would be dying to want eventual marriage! I'd be weird not to!

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Sat 03/15/14 05:49 AM
It's been multiple different people, multiple different times over a prolonged period of time. The guy who stood me up actually somewhat stood me up a month earlier too. I still haven't met him yet and last time he did something like this, he waited 4 weeks to claim that he was too busy to meet up or even answer my phone calls that day because of his grandmother having health problems. Seems weird that multiple different guys use the grandmother excuse too for never getting back to me. I remember the first time a guy said this to me a day after a very charitable girl begged him to offer to take me to the Valentines Day dance (back in 7th grade) and turns out his grandparent being sick was a lame excuse to not go to the school dance with me (by the way I never got any dates for literally YEARS after that date-that-never-happened).

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Sat 03/15/14 05:43 AM
It might simply be because you're young, and most people around your age don't have kids yet, let alone multiple kids. Guys your age are just starting to branch out on their own and move out of home, so they have the bachelor mentality and are still partying. Even a decent portion of guys in their mid 20s are still this way.

It could also be that guys find it generally trashy to be 22 and have so many kids especially by multiple guys who are nothing more than "baby daddies". Your 3 kids by multiple fathers shows that either you have some sort of major deficiency which makes guys not want to stick around--even when a product of their own DNA is involved--or that you have lousy taste in dudes. It's one thing to be duped or ditched once while having a guy's kid (even that looks bad though, honestly), but 3 separate times?? Guys see the multiple baby daddy thing as emotional drama (the situation itself is dramatic, even if the dads are MIA from your life), trashy, and pathetic. They WILL wonder what is wrong with you to keep becoming a single mom again and again and again.

Then again, it could also be that the kids aren't the issue but that they're just not attracted to you. You appear heavyset and your face isn't really pretty. If you want guys, you have to step it up a few notches . Maybe guys make an excuse about not wanting kids, because it sounds "normal" for a 22 yr old guy to not want to be a step daddy at least at his age, when in reality he thinks you're desperate and not attractive.

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Fri 03/14/14 09:55 PM
Not to mention that I haven't been laid in a long time and with the way things are going, I'll probably end up serving a "sexless lent" (like in the movie 40 Days 40 Nights) but NOT by my choice. This is bs!! All guys say that it's so easy for girls to get laid...that just makes me feel bad about myself!

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Fri 03/14/14 09:50 PM
Edited by princess4u2014 on Fri 03/14/14 09:51 PM
This site is bs...I just got stood up tonight. How bad is my appearance and personality that I can't even meet a guy? And 2 weeks before that, I had what was the biggest breakthrough all year from this site...an actual date! I spent $65 on a babysitter (even though I'm in a lot of debt), just to have the guy decide after only that one date that he wouldn't see himself marrying me and therefore would not want to see me again. I did nothing wrong, he just isn't into me. Wtf! I guess I should hang up my hat on wanting to get married. I haven't had a decent relationship in FIVE years wtf!!!

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Wed 02/19/14 12:48 AM
Still married and looking for an intimate encounter aka booty call? No thanks. Next. SMFH

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Wed 02/19/14 12:41 AM
Im in the same boat. This sounds exactly like something I'd write but reverse gender. I hate this site and I hate men for always rejecting me.

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Tue 02/18/14 12:28 AM
Ugh this site has done hardly any good for me. Real Life...even worse. Wtf. Am I that ugly or are phillly guys just that crazy to pass me over wtf????

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Sun 02/09/14 12:18 PM
By the way my previous comment was in response to Scoobert34.

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Sun 02/09/14 10:56 AM
Understandable, but you said yourself you're "not looking to date". I've found that with a lot of guys who don't have kids. Just looking for "fun" (aka booty call) and "nothing serious". The ones who do want something serious, want a girl without kids who isn't "used goods". Yes there's plenty of guys with kids who just want to use for hookups too, but more that are past that phase in their life and seeking a united family.

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