your friend who is getting involved with a man who just left his wife this weekend?

Now, she's like me, and she's gonna do what she's gonna do and no one is gonna tell her any different. So keep that in mind.

Thus far she's told him to "get his life straight" and they can go from there when he's more stable.....BUT I know it's gonna be sooner than that...

What is some sound logical advise that will hit her and make her listen?

Oh side note, she's know him for over a year, and we were friends with the wife and know the wife cheated on him a few times and only wanted him for the paycheck.... First hand knowledge of this fact...

Ask her if the friendship is important to her,, If this did not work out the way she wants it to,, the friendship you all have might not ever be the same from this point forward,,

Well we were better friends with the husband, but do know the wife and she admitted to us that she cheated and told us "I hope he gets this new job in NY it pays better and I'll only have to see him about 2 weekends a month"

The wife isn't exactly our kind of people if you know what I mean. She's nice enough to us, but we never really accepted her because of the way she treated him, but we included her for his sake.

And does she really want to be the "rebound" anyone just getting out of a marriage needs time and space for a relationship to get their head straight

Well, if she is gonna do what she will do, then all you can really do is love on her no matter what. When people make their mind up, and they are that stubborn to not listen to anything, it is so hard to help.

But, you asked for some logical advice, and about all I can say is that if she says that she wants him to get "all his ducks in a row" and get his life straight, then no matter how long that takes she needs to stick by it. No compromise or nothing. If this guy wants to be with her and she with him then they will work together on this.

Ohhhhhhhhhhhh sweetie I got nothin here,
Sending ya good thoughts some hugs

Sorry, too Jerry Springer'ish like for me to even respond in an adult manner.

You lost me at "would you tell...".

Carry on, peanut gallery.

I already told her that... and that he's got a ton of issues to begin with...

Ya, I told her that too...

I've seen this brewing for months now. I thought it was one sided with him, but now I find she's fallen for him also.

She is stubborn like me, but there will be one or two triggers that will make her turn her head I feel I owe it to her to find those triggers....AND SLAP HER ACROSS THE FACE WITH THEM.

Thank you so much for your response...

I agree. Don't you just love drama?

She wants me to have lunch with them tomorrow... I may have to point out how they are both broken bikes and are no good to each other until they fix themselves... I hate being the b*tch, but there are 8 kids involved between them.

"once a cheater, always a cheater."




she'll be right where his ex-wife is right now after he finds some fresh lady-meat

Eight kids between them? To me that is a pretty powerful trigger!

Reminder her that she is a mother first, a woman second! She is charged with making decisions that are in the best interests of her kids, and to some extent his if he isn't capable right now. She needs to protect them from the "drama" that comes from being involved with a guy that doesn't have it together yet and is reeling from what
is going on in his CURRENT marriage (that should be another trigger.)

If my friend hit me with that argument it would have the same affect as a stinging slap across the face....

who cheated?

Trying to tell a friend who to love is a good way to loose a friend. It will be real hard but if you can just step back and be ready to pick up the pieces because this has disaster written all over it like you think it does. Maybe try to get her into some kind of counseling when things fall apart. Find out where the family shelter's are because she could well end up homeless with four kids that will be pretty rough.

I think she is going to do whatever she wants anyways. All you can do is be here for her when it blows up in her face!

sound logical advice to a woman in heat.....

You said: "your friend who is getting involved with a man who just left his wife this weekend? "


With the keyword wife and not girlfriend, a weekend isn't enough time for a divorce nor is it enough time for your friend and the dude to instantaneously meet and run off together. Therefore I deduce that the man has been cheating on his wife with your friend for a while and then left his wife for her.

Ah, NOPE.

We were all friends, and he left her then confessed his feelings to her.

It's a piece of paper, to some it's important to others it isn't. I'm not going to debate that with anyone.

When I said involved I meant she was entertaining the idea of dating him. Nothing has happened YET as of today at 7pm.