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| Topic: nOT eASY tO f IN D | |
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They sound able enough to do a bit of laundry too.
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I think we need to see things from the kids' perspective. I'm not making accusations but most kids are not prepared for a revolving door of their parents' "friends". I went through that, it's incredibly painful, lonely, embarrassing and sad. You get used to one person, then boom, they're gone, then along comes someone else. After a while, you're like, forget it, I want NOTHING to do with that. To this day, my mother and I have a standing rule, on her wedding day, I will meet the man du jour. Otherwise, no thank you.
I'm 42 and still scarred by it. You might want to think about that. 
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I guess that after seeing what has been posted so far I have been lucky. My kids go to spend time with their father everyother weekend. When I do happen to find someone to spend time with, I have every other weekend to be free to do so. When I was first divorced and my son lived with me ( he was 16 at the time), He was not going to let some guy come over. And told me about it all the time. Thank goodness the one guy was like, "I dont care if you have kids and if I want to stop by and see if you want to go for a ride on the bike, I am going to stop by." And he did. On the other hand, there were more guys that didnt want the hastle of a teen boy giving them dirty looks. (I couldnt blame them) But under no way, no how did any of them EVER spend the night when the kids were home. That was a big no, no. If they didnt like that, they were out of here right quick. The only suggestion I have is just be patient. The right person will come along and fit in your life and the kids will adjust. Good Luck. Not to sound DESPERATE but it has been 4 YEARS!!! |
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They sound able enough to do a bit of laundry too. Tru Dat, My oldest helps with his laundry, trash, and cooking... between his school,girls, friends, and skate boarding. 
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I think we need to see things from the kids' perspective. I'm not making accusations but most kids are not prepared for a revolving door of their parents' "friends". I went through that, it's incredibly painful, lonely, embarrassing and sad. You get used to one person, then boom, they're gone, then along comes someone else. After a while, you're like, forget it, I want NOTHING to do with that. To this day, my mother and I have a standing rule, on her wedding day, I will meet the man du jour. Otherwise, no thank you. I'm 42 and still scarred by it. You might want to think about that. This is VERY true! |
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I guess that after seeing what has been posted so far I have been lucky. My kids go to spend time with their father everyother weekend. When I do happen to find someone to spend time with, I have every other weekend to be free to do so. When I was first divorced and my son lived with me ( he was 16 at the time), He was not going to let some guy come over. And told me about it all the time. Thank goodness the one guy was like, "I dont care if you have kids and if I want to stop by and see if you want to go for a ride on the bike, I am going to stop by." And he did. On the other hand, there were more guys that didnt want the hastle of a teen boy giving them dirty looks. (I couldnt blame them) But under no way, no how did any of them EVER spend the night when the kids were home. That was a big no, no. If they didnt like that, they were out of here right quick. The only suggestion I have is just be patient. The right person will come along and fit in your life and the kids will adjust. Good Luck. Not to sound DESPERATE but it has been 4 YEARS!!! Good things come to those who wait. |
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I guess that after seeing what has been posted so far I have been lucky. My kids go to spend time with their father everyother weekend. When I do happen to find someone to spend time with, I have every other weekend to be free to do so. When I was first divorced and my son lived with me ( he was 16 at the time), He was not going to let some guy come over. And told me about it all the time. Thank goodness the one guy was like, "I dont care if you have kids and if I want to stop by and see if you want to go for a ride on the bike, I am going to stop by." And he did. On the other hand, there were more guys that didnt want the hastle of a teen boy giving them dirty looks. (I couldnt blame them) But under no way, no how did any of them EVER spend the night when the kids were home. That was a big no, no. If they didnt like that, they were out of here right quick. The only suggestion I have is just be patient. The right person will come along and fit in your life and the kids will adjust. Good Luck. Not to sound DESPERATE but it has been 4 YEARS!!! Good things come to those who wait. Sticking my tounge out at you and going ...... 
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my son is eager for me to meet someone knowing your predicaments I can easily understand why? he does and I don't blame him 
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So who has been divorced, and you have you teen aged kids that live with you, and you find some one you like to bring home but the kids dont wont you to brind her over... Most of the girls that i have found dont wont or cant handle the "pre-pakaged deal".... I don't intro a guy to my kids until I am sure we are an "item" and never ever let a guy spend the night when my kids are home. (and I mean a guy I am in a relationship with) They've been thru enough with divorce .. I don't need to drag them thru any more. Just sayin
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I guess that after seeing what has been posted so far I have been lucky. My kids go to spend time with their father everyother weekend. When I do happen to find someone to spend time with, I have every other weekend to be free to do so. When I was first divorced and my son lived with me ( he was 16 at the time), He was not going to let some guy come over. And told me about it all the time. Thank goodness the one guy was like, "I dont care if you have kids and if I want to stop by and see if you want to go for a ride on the bike, I am going to stop by." And he did. On the other hand, there were more guys that didnt want the hastle of a teen boy giving them dirty looks. (I couldnt blame them) But under no way, no how did any of them EVER spend the night when the kids were home. That was a big no, no. If they didnt like that, they were out of here right quick. The only suggestion I have is just be patient. The right person will come along and fit in your life and the kids will adjust. Good Luck. Not to sound DESPERATE but it has been 4 YEARS!!! Same here( 4 years single ) And you dont sound desperate. But you also dont want to have your kids go through what SuzinVa went through. I have to ask, and you can tell me its none of my beeswax, but isnt there any family around for the kids to spend time with so you can entertain in private, once you find the right person? That might be a solution you havent thought of. |
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They sound able enough to do a bit of laundry too. Yes but thats there way of not >wonting<! When i was a kid if i didnt do what i was told my dad would either reach for his belt or the nearest branch and whoop my ass! Today its take away prevleage's...... |
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My son is the same way. He DOES not want ME to meet anyone much less him having to meet them. Kids are funny and he is 13! You would think he would understand at his age.  most of it is deeply psychological and they don't even realize they're doing it. my mom said that i did things to sabotage her "relationships" when i was a teenager. i have no recollection of such mischief. . . . |
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I guess that after seeing what has been posted so far I have been lucky. My kids go to spend time with their father everyother weekend. When I do happen to find someone to spend time with, I have every other weekend to be free to do so. When I was first divorced and my son lived with me ( he was 16 at the time), He was not going to let some guy come over. And told me about it all the time. Thank goodness the one guy was like, "I dont care if you have kids and if I want to stop by and see if you want to go for a ride on the bike, I am going to stop by." And he did. On the other hand, there were more guys that didnt want the hastle of a teen boy giving them dirty looks. (I couldnt blame them) But under no way, no how did any of them EVER spend the night when the kids were home. That was a big no, no. If they didnt like that, they were out of here right quick. The only suggestion I have is just be patient. The right person will come along and fit in your life and the kids will adjust. Good Luck. Not to sound DESPERATE but it has been 4 YEARS!!! That would be GREAt.......... But i am all alone in this... I work and then work some more and more.. not much of a break for me.... oh well.... Same here( 4 years single ) And you dont sound desperate. But you also dont want to have your kids go through what SuzinVa went through. I have to ask, and you can tell me its none of my beeswax, but isnt there any family around for the kids to spend time with so you can entertain in private, once you find the right person? That might be a solution you havent thought of. |
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I guess that after seeing what has been posted so far I have been lucky. My kids go to spend time with their father everyother weekend. When I do happen to find someone to spend time with, I have every other weekend to be free to do so. When I was first divorced and my son lived with me ( he was 16 at the time), He was not going to let some guy come over. And told me about it all the time. Thank goodness the one guy was like, "I dont care if you have kids and if I want to stop by and see if you want to go for a ride on the bike, I am going to stop by." And he did. On the other hand, there were more guys that didnt want the hastle of a teen boy giving them dirty looks. (I couldnt blame them) But under no way, no how did any of them EVER spend the night when the kids were home. That was a big no, no. If they didnt like that, they were out of here right quick. The only suggestion I have is just be patient. The right person will come along and fit in your life and the kids will adjust. Good Luck. Not to sound DESPERATE but it has been 4 YEARS!!! Good things come to those who wait. Sticking my tounge out at you and going ...... Patience is a virtue 
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If you are in Ft.Worth and wont to stop by my work(Lowe's) send me a e-mail....
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If you are in Ft.Worth and wont to stop by my work(Lowe's) send me a e-mail.... Now that's a slight sign of desperation 
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I'll tell you what worked for me...
I told the kids if Mom can't have a social life, neither can they. After 1 weekend of sitting at home with mom, they were much more open minded about things. |
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I was feeling alittle selfish wont to take care of my needs.... Plus they are in that wonderfull age of 16 boy and 13 girl....AH AH AHA AHA HA AHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I have full placement of my 16 yo girl and 13 yo boy. They come 1st EVERY time. If my date doesn't like that, she can hit the road. They already have a mom that neglects them - they don't need any more stress. I have ongoing talks with them privately, one at a time, to make sure they know I care about their feelings. |
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