It seems to me that the men nowa days are so judgement...thinking that a woman must be a hoe if she has kids...not true!!! last time i was with any one was in february and that was my sons dad and i havent been with else in over 2 years...so what is you're take on this...is it i am UNATTRACTIVE now that i have children...i am not fat or anything...i am in alright shape..well im not muscular but i am on my way to being toned.. i walk alot and i started to do yoga... IS IT JUST THE FAMILY ASPECT THAT SCARES THE GUYS AWAY OR SOMETHING?? I AM JUST WONDERING

Some men and some women do not like getting involved with others who have children. It's just their preference. Especially in your age group. It's not you.

Just give it some time. If I were younger and closer I would definitely be contacting you.

i think younger men are scarred of women with kids because they are scared of the thought of being a father. when i was in my early twenties i would have never dated a woman with a kid. now that im almost 27 i would rather date a woman with kids because i know she will be less maintenance.

It's both sweetie. How ever, if you look long enough and be patient you will find a man that will love all of you. All of you meaning your kids, your family, and you! Please take care.

I dont think I would have dated anyone with a child when I was under 25 but now that OMG I hate to say it Im 30 :( It wouldnt matter at all to me. I think its someting that justs scares you when you are younger.

You beat me to it...that's what I was going to say, but let me add that a lot of guys, in your age group are NOT ready for a family.

It wouldn't have anything to do with you...it's just they have a lot of growing up to do them selves. They wouldn't mind playing in the sand box(if you know what I mean), but the added responsibility is not part of what they want!

There are some exceptions...just have to weed through them. Good luck!

Well said

I myself don't want kids.

Its probably the age group your dateing. A single parent is no big deal in your mid life. The measuring stick is if you are a good parent not a parent. Be true to yourself and put your child first and you will find a good man in time. When I was a younger single parent I kept my kids and dateing seperate for years and years. that was what worked for me anyhow.

Mochadelasia,
You're a HERO, not a HO. To take on such awesome responsibility at such a young age...I admire your courage and fortitude!
Hey, the guy who has been sent to you and is "right" for you will prove himself by readily accepting, even WELCOMING that you're a mom of nineteen.
And in NO WAY are you unattractive! In fact, you're very beautiful!
There are probably guys out there who are actually sterile...who may actually be ecstatic to marry into a ready-made family, with such a beautiful wife and kids!
I admit I can't totally relate to parenthood, as I'm forty-eight...never been married, with no kids...the opposite end of the spectrum. But I know a woman of good character when I see her!
I read a lot of pain in your post...please don't be down on yourself; don't let these judgmental morons get you down!
As you say, you're hitting all the bases...you take care of yourself, physically, mentally...you do value yourself, as well you should!

Keep up with the Yoga...after awhile you will understand ...


Namaste

Because you have children..many people hesitate to get involved fearing that your ex will be a constant part of your life..I am a single parent myself, and can relate..but you are a beautiful girl..mr. Right will be happy to take the chance when you find him.

I would love to have a kid .Never got blessed with one .I wish you were closer.

One perspective --

I dated several women who had kids when I was younger. I found it didn't work for me. I don't think a woman is a "hoe" if she has kids -- I don't like blanket statements in any sense of the term -- it isn't about any of that.

What it's about is a lifestyle, a priority, that simply doesn't fit into my life. That, in no way, reflects badly on people who have kids -- it's just a decision I've made regarding what I want in my life, and what I don't want.

It isn't directed at you personally. It isn't directed at anyone specifically. I just have no interest in dating anyone with kids.

I don't date people who drink, either. That doesn't mean everyone who drinks is an alcoholic. I just don't want alcohol in my life at all. A decision I made.

As far as you I don't see you see you as that. I see someone who likely has been hurt by a lot of guys. They see you as having a child so they automatically assume you will put out. when they don't get it. they get all but hurt and leave. Well let them. You don't need that type of guy. you need the guy who will be there for the long hall. Hope this helps.

Yes under most circumstances I would say that kids scream commitment....or they are less likely to get serious with you knowing that there is another man in the picture. Also, alot of men want a date and can not seem to understand that the man has to be the one to work arround your schedule cause you have kids...

what if it were a situation where the man is in a differant province and has actually avoided any contact other than financial help, he chose a lifestyle and i told him i do not want to expose my kids to his lifestyle would that effect a mans opinion on a relationship with me if the father isnt involved at all...he has only see his son 2 times..

Ive never heard anyone ever say someone was a hoe that had kids..

Thats wierd. Ive also never had a man have a problem with my child.


Why would our children be a mans business?

Hes my man, not my childs parent.


Leave the parenting to the parents.

i look at woman that has kids as JACKPOT! that means she puts out