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| Topic: frustrated !! frustrated !! frustrated !! | |
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why is it that people call social services on the parents that are trying there best to do the right thing with there kids. My ex called on me now I am being investigated and the case well remain open until they find what he says is true or they decide to close it because they find he lied. And what makes me made most is they called him after being here and he told them he called because he was mad and that he lied but the have an open case and cant close it i just don't get this!! i am a good mom I am not perfect but i try my best we all make mistakes right? And i don't like that they can question a 4 year old child with out the mother or father there to hear the answers. I mean kids make up things.
 ANYONE GOT THOUGHTS ON THIS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
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Just do what they ask and no matter how mad they might make you don`t let them see you angry.They will do their little investigation and when they don`t find anything wrong the case will be closed.I don`t know what state your in but they should have some kind of free legal service,you might try to get a lawyer. If they find nothing wrong and you can prove that your ex called them only because he was mad,you can file charges on him for making false claims against you. Good luck and stay strong.
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Edited by
AGoodGuy1026
on
Thu 12/10/09 02:11 PM
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because it's for the childs benefit. If you have nothing to hide, there will be no problems.
Think about it this way, if there was a call to child services - if someone lied or not - that situation in and of itself warrants investigation... If a parent is angry enough to lie and call child services - their are some obvious anger issues that need to be investigated. It's likely they are trying to get a feel for the situation. It's better than services doing nothing - and a child ends up harmed in the middle of an angry fight between the parents. Basically, it sounds like they are following procedure. Don't blame child services for doing their job, blame the person who made the call (or yourself whichever is applicable only you know the whole truth, we only know your side)... No harm, no foul. Think about it from the childs perspective. |
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Both gentlemen make valid posts-excellent advice.
you should just do what you are asked to do- Your child is the most important person in this issue- they know what they are doing and how to handle the questioning of your child- there will be a child advocate with your baby- don't worry about that. just tell the truth/your side of it- and as you were told before if you have nothing to hide- it will all be fine you just have to go with it-it will all work out like its supposed to and there will be a case file just in case something else comes up in the future |
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thanks everyone
and i am doing what they ask and i am not mad that they came to check out the complaint but i am up set that when my daugther was in here fathers care and 12 police men when in to his home and took many different drugs not one person stepped in and said hey there are 4 children here all 4 years old and younger. and here in Canada it seams they just let people have drugs around kids and beat the crap out of them but when its some one like myself that is trying to do things wright they are here on the first call. i am not the perfect mom and not saying i am. I have an out of control 4yr old and a 17 month old son i struggle to cope a 4yr old that hits me spits at me you name it she dose it and its all new since October when her step father left. things get worse when i try to put her on time out so i let it go it don't help. being 24 and 2 children on my own was not my plan for life but i love my children and would never change this. thanks again |
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thanks everyone and i am doing what they ask and i am not mad that they came to check out the complaint but i am up set that when my daugther was in here fathers care and 12 police men when in to his home and took many different drugs not one person stepped in and said hey there are 4 children here all 4 years old and younger. and here in Canada it seams they just let people have drugs around kids and beat the crap out of them but when its some one like myself that is trying to do things wright they are here on the first call. i am not the perfect mom and not saying i am. I have an out of control 4yr old and a 17 month old son i struggle to cope a 4yr old that hits me spits at me you name it she dose it and its all new since October when her step father left. things get worse when i try to put her on time out so i let it go it don't help. being 24 and 2 children on my own was not my plan for life but i love my children and would never change this. thanks again This might end up being the perfect opportunity to get some help for your son. Let them know your problem with him and see if they can offer you both some counseling. 
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thanks everyone and i am doing what they ask and i am not mad that they came to check out the complaint but i am up set that when my daugther was in here fathers care and 12 police men when in to his home and took many different drugs not one person stepped in and said hey there are 4 children here all 4 years old and younger. and here in Canada it seams they just let people have drugs around kids and beat the crap out of them but when its some one like myself that is trying to do things wright they are here on the first call. i am not the perfect mom and not saying i am. I have an out of control 4yr old and a 17 month old son i struggle to cope a 4yr old that hits me spits at me you name it she dose it and its all new since October when her step father left. things get worse when i try to put her on time out so i let it go it don't help. being 24 and 2 children on my own was not my plan for life but i love my children and would never change this. thanks again am not really sure how things work in canada...but if you have an open dependemncy case regardless of what the issue you might have been you should get what ever services you need speak to them and tell them whats going on and suggest counseling not only for your child both for the both of you together and they will nore than likely give you that opportunity and take it therapy does wonders speacially on kids with seperated parents (or well i believe so) and stay strong for your kids sometimes we make decisions that are not always the brightest but those kids am sure make all situations better even if sometimes you become angry and if for some reason you think that he shouldnt be aloud unsupervised visits because his house is unsafe do to the drugs and all that that you mention tell your case manager and they will cunduct an investigation on his house and say whether it is appropriate for the kids (safety wise) or not and if its not then your kids will have supervised visits with the father somewhere else not at his home. |
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I am taking the help with my daughter and son. am glad that there is help out there too just don't agree with some of the ways child service works.
and i know that it was my ex that called because he told me and when i brought it up that they had been to my home he said they called him back and he tried to tell them he was upset over the brake up and it was not true but the because was started so they must flow throw with it. but i mean i dont have any thing to hide it just makes me upset that they are wasting time here when they never even looked in on the drug bust at my ex's home makes since to them i guess thanks every one really
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My ex did the same to me when we went through the divorce...LOL...I still have the report which says I wouldn't hurt my child. They are smarter than you think...and they know no one is perfect...so just be a good mom and it will be fine.
But I do remember being terrified and thinking they would take my child away just because he called. |
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thanks everyone and i am doing what they ask and i am not mad that they came to check out the complaint but i am up set that when my daugther was in here fathers care and 12 police men when in to his home and took many different drugs not one person stepped in and said hey there are 4 children here all 4 years old and younger. and here in Canada it seams they just let people have drugs around kids and beat the crap out of them but when its some one like myself that is trying to do things wright they are here on the first call. i am not the perfect mom and not saying i am. I have an out of control 4yr old and a 17 month old son i struggle to cope a 4yr old that hits me spits at me you name it she dose it and its all new since October when her step father left. things get worse when i try to put her on time out so i let it go it don't help. being 24 and 2 children on my own was not my plan for life but i love my children and would never change this. thanks again I don't want to come off as being rude or judgemental, I am just making a statement! If your children are hard for you to handle and your 4 year old spits in your face, I think its time to do something about it!! If your child is out of control, you need to get a handle on the situation while you can. I have learned that you can not be your childs friend..you have to be the boss!! Friendship comes after your children move out!! Trust me, you make them mind and they will love you all the more!! If you have nothing to hide then you have nothing to worry about. |
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always use RECORDS to prove ur case, NOT UR OPINIONS, OR ONLY YOUR OWN WORDS DESCRIBING UR OWN GOOD BEHAVIOUR, as such will always result in MORE INVESTIGATION, NOT LESS???
unless of course, ONE HAVE POLITICAL CLOUT, OR IS CONNECTED, and if u were one of these, THIS POST WOULD NOT EXIST... so, being u r a commoner, of the country of canada, use must use ur better wit and intelligence, to learn more, not falling to the temptation to defend urself, which will only but ensanre urself... the last thing a cps wants to hear, is no one is perfect, i am just human, which is the SAME AS SAYING, I MAKE EXCUSES FOR ALL MYSELF CREATES, and as such, WILL DO MANY THINGS, AND BLAME IT ON OTHER'S??? understand??? if said ex, or man was raided by police, then NO CPS worker will not see UR VALID CARING FOR CHILDREN... but, u speak AS IF THEY R THE "BAD GUYS", which cannot be missed, is HOW UR MAN HAD TO THINK, to end where HE IS NOW, OR WAS WHEN RAIDED??? if one think "outside" ANYTHING is the AGAINST SELF, SELF WIL LITERALLY TURN OUTSIDE AGAISNT ITSELF, as it's own 'thought energy' will signal outside to NOT TRUST, OR LIKE SELF, and these that do such, will complain and wonder why ALL ARE AGAINST SELF, AND POUNT THEIR OWN HEADS AGAINST BRICK WALLS??? the brick wall, SELF MUST SEE HOW ITSELF IS CREATING IT, and get stronger in self, and not fall prey to the tmeptress of self denial, which shall feel good, BUT BLIND SELF TO ALL THE FACTS ITSELF IS CREATING... if one truly cares about kids, then it would see that if CPS WAS NOT THERE, then the kids down the street my be getting raped and beaten the more??? SO, MAKE THEM UR FRIENDS, AND RELAIZE THEY R UR FRIENDS, AND THEY WILL HELP U, NOT SLUG U IN THE FACE, AS U R BELIEVING NOW... just one cent |
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I don't know what you are gripeing about. Now you have someone to help you find resources.
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and here in Canada it seams they just let people have drugs around kids and beat the crap out of them and you've seen instances of this? sorry, but i find that hard to believe, working as i do very closely with various children's aid societies. |
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and here in Canada it seams they just let people have drugs around kids and beat the crap out of them and you've seen instances of this? sorry, but i find that hard to believe, working as i do very closely with various children's aid societies. Canadian kids are bigger brats and they need the beatings more |
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but i thought everything was bigger in texas honey *batting eyelashes*
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Edited by
LonlyGirl4124
on
Sun 12/13/09 02:37 PM
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hottie
i know its hard but it well get better |
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and here in Canada it seams they just let people have drugs around kids and beat the crap out of them and you've seen instances of this? sorry, but i find that hard to believe, working as i do very closely with various children's aid societies. Yes i have i know a family here that killed there baby and the children's aid was in there home just days before and nothing was dont now a 13 month old baby is lost her life. when they found this baby the parents were high on many different drugs the child had been bet to death. but maybe its not just child services we have to blame but it still makes me mad that this child had to louse her life so soon. |
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 ... They will spot a revenge call/report in a likkety~split if the home and atmosphere is sound! SO common ... One of my clients, and best friends for decades, was the Director of all of Texas'CPS for many years'; I learned so much about the backroom ops ... ... GL ... Big Hug and just keep trukkin' and doin' your very best ...
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thanks and i was told the case well be close soon there are a few things in my new apartment that i had to deal with like 2 baby gates so they well be back again to see its done then its over they told me its nothing to louse my kids over and that makes me fell better.
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just want to say that i got a letter saying the case was closed and no worries they say i am doing everything right and all so i feel better now and i even got some help were it was needed.:)
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