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| Topic: It Hurts | |
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Alright....*sigh*
Now, everybody said I told you so and this is my fault entirely. I just found out today my ex lost his father 2 weeks ago. Now, I understand he was going through a rough time but I hung out with this guy trying to get his mind off his dad being sick. He told me he was getting better. I'm not completely upset he didn't tell me. I guess its true that not everyone in my life opens to me but this isn't the reason I was so broken the second he told me this. I was deeply upset that he lied to me when we were talking each time. When I asked him about it, he said "I was sure I told you." Apparently I was the only one who didn't know. When I said no, he goes "well I told a lot of people" All I could say was "well I'm not in life so I understand." He didn't say anything back. I just feel like this isn't worth it to thread on anymore. I felt so used and hurt like I've never been before. My heart should not be breaking, but it is, and I am SO tired of falling prey to it every time.  This is going to be a long night ahead of me... |
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I am so sorry sweetie. It hurts when someone is not completely honest when you are there for them. You are a sweet person and didn't deserve that.
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SOME things can be over looked,,and some things can't be?
If he's lost a parent,,his mind could be a billion miles away right now,,just saying? But I do hope you get feeling better over this,,as stuff does happen,,that we can't change,,and you can't beat yourself up over it,,,,love and hugs 
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Aww, don't feel down :( It very well could have slipped his mind. When my father passed I was completely blank for months... I wouldn't even be able to remember what I did a few hours before, let alone days before.. Just keep your chin up, I'm sure you will figure everything out! Good luck, and hope ya feel better! :)
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It's ok, it was a number of years ago already. Thanks though :)
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HELLO, be strong GIRL, tough time never lasts, tough people do -ROBERT SCHULLER. When the going gets tough, the tough gets going. ANONYMOUS. Best of luck.
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It is just one of those things Honey Ain't fun but, it happens. At least you got us to wipe your nose, kiss your boo boos, pat you on the butt and send you back out to play.
:) Sorry doll. |
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it could be that the time he had with you was his time away from his troubles and being with you, you were all he wanted to think about....so he just wasn't thinking about it or didn't want to talk about it because he wanted to focus on you.
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If you haven't lost a parent yourself, you can't understand the way it can affect you. If you're close to the parent, you just go into shock. You don't even realize that's what you're doing. You think you're functioning normally, but on looking back later there can be things you totally don't remember. It lasts for different lengths of time for different people. From what you said, it sounds like this guy was in deep distress. I hope you can forgive him. I'd bet that he had no intention of lying to you -- after all, what would be the benefit for him in that? It just doesn't make sense to me.
Please think about whether you could be projecting some insecurity onto him. Obviously I don't know the situation and could be wrong. But if you didn't have any doubts about him before, I'd suggest that this wouldn't be a good reason to start doubting him. Just look at the whole context of the relationship before deciding. Whichever way, I wish you the best. |
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If you haven't lost a parent yourself, you can't understand the way it can affect you. If you're close to the parent, you just go into shock. You don't even realize that's what you're doing. You think you're functioning normally, but on looking back later there can be things you totally don't remember. It lasts for different lengths of time for different people. From what you said, it sounds like this guy was in deep distress. I hope you can forgive him. I'd bet that he had no intention of lying to you -- after all, what would be the benefit for him in that? It just doesn't make sense to me. Please think about whether you could be projecting some insecurity onto him. Obviously I don't know the situation and could be wrong. But if you didn't have any doubts about him before, I'd suggest that this wouldn't be a good reason to start doubting him. Just look at the whole context of the relationship before deciding. Whichever way, I wish you the best. 
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I just can't be a part of someone's life when they lied to me about something so big. I was so close to his dad too. I deserved to know the truth. I can't stand being pushed away. I've talked to this guy face to face about it, about how men just use me when they need someone to talk to, now I just don't know how to be. I wish I could turn myself off from breaking but last night I avoided his calls and couldn't sleep. I hate this pattern. I hate trusting people. All they do is use you in their big game.
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Edited by
Mirage4279
on
Sun 02/05/12 01:26 PM
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I just can't be a part of someone's life when they lied to me about something so big. I was so close to his dad too. I deserved to know the truth. I can't stand being pushed away. I've talked to this guy face to face about it, about how men just use me when they need someone to talk to, now I just don't know how to be. I wish I could turn myself off from breaking but last night I avoided his calls and couldn't sleep. I hate this pattern. I hate trusting people. All they do is use you in their big game. That's what you get for ignoring me on your instant messenger... He's having me and his Dad over for the football game I'll have you know (take that).  You're hardly on there...I don't ignore anyone. |
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I'm not thinking about the Superbowl now. My mind is wondering.
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I'm not thinking about the Superbowl now. My mind is wondering. A message I posted in anonymous message thread applies to you too. "A broken heart will always heal, but will never be fully repaired." |
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I'm not thinking about the Superbowl now. My mind is wondering. A message I posted in anonymous message thread applies to you too. "A broken heart will always heal, but will never be fully repaired." We need a "like" or "Thumbs up" option lol |
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I just can't be a part of someone's life when they lied to me about something so big. I was so close to his dad too. I deserved to know the truth. I can't stand being pushed away. I've talked to this guy face to face about it, about how men just use me when they need someone to talk to, now I just don't know how to be. I wish I could turn myself off from breaking but last night I avoided his calls and couldn't sleep. I hate this pattern. I hate trusting people. All they do is use you in their big game. I am hearing different things here Mariah. He is NOT pushing you away. He is trying to call you. Is it wise to close the door on compassion and communication?? |
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I think you are too sensitive. If you simply accept people for how they are and not expect them to act in a specific way you would not be so disappointed.
But I know what it feels like to be used. Some people are like vampires and they can suck all the energy and heart out of you. Let them go. Let it go. Find your own bliss. |
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Edited by
Jeanniebean
on
Sun 02/05/12 02:14 PM
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sweetestgirl11 said: Is it wise to close the door on compassion and communication?? Sometimes it is better to be more detached and objective where it concerns other people's problems. You can't fix the world, and you can't fix other people's lives. You can be compassionate without expecting some kind of gratification for it or without expecting something in return. In order to communicate you need to focus on understanding the other person instead of your own needs regarding the relationship. |
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