How long do you usually wait before dating again after a relationship? I'm not talking about marriage or a 10 year relationship. I'm talking about a relationship that lasted less than a year. I seem to wait 6 to 12 months before I feel ready to try again. Just wondering how others feel about it.

Ruth, I have been in one relationship so long ... I would like to know as well. There is so much that is confusing right now. But 6-12 months seems a long time to me.

I didn't wait at first and was dating 1 or 2 others before my last break up was final (mainly because I could not seem to convince him that I meant it and he kept coming over all the time - not that I minded. we were pretty good friends, but anyway. I was even thinking of visiting him some time soon if it wouldn't interfere with a new GF)

SOOOO that break up was a little touch & go. And I was dating another and then I moved....had a couple dates that didin't go well

At that point my drama meter was on high alert so I have been on a break for about the last year and a half.

I'm ready again, just haven't met anyone....and anyone I might be interested in has not asked ...sooo....that's how it goes

I have been in a relationship for more than 30 years, but after her stroke she has been incapacitated and does not even know me anymore. So for me, five years is a long time to see the woman that you love and not having any recognition.

Sweetest, make sure to send good signs. Smoke signals will work for some guys, but for others more drastic measures are in order :-).

Well, it's usually closer to 6. But, I didn't date at all in 2011. In 2012 I was in a 4 month relationship and then waited 10 months. I was dating my last boyfriend for only about 6 weeks. Maybe I need to jump back in the saddle sooner.

I guess I just get very emotionally tied to someone and it takes me longer to disengage.

Immediately.
I don't like being alone.
It makes me paranoid.

Immediately.


Why not?

I think that's a totally different kind of situation. I am very sorry for what you are going through.

I don't know. That's why I'm asking.

You might miss a good one if you hesitate. If I hadn't flipped off the one who led me on I would've missed this wonderful woman I'm with now. So remember, he who hesitates is lost....

There is no set time usually 1 month to 6 months until I come to terms with the after effects. I need a little time to gather myself and the last thing I want is to jump into "the frying pan" right away.

Frying pans are fun.

Thank you Ruth. I think mine is different too. I feel like I have been grieving for a long time. I am ready to feel wanted and needed again.

For me it is less about time and more about how I feel. I know when I am centered, strong and together. They are typically the times I am not looking for romance...and delightfully and effortlessly the times that romance typically finds me.

I say leave yourself open for any possibility. The right person could be just around the corner. If your attracted to someone then don't wait for them. Let them know.

It takes me a while.

So very true.

Humm all depends when I get asked out for a date again....It has been 16 months since I had one... Not that I go anywhere to meet anyone if it happens it happens and will as soon as I get the chance

For me, it is all about how long it takes me
to actually..disconnect from them.
Could be an hour, could be 10 years.

If they are still residing in 'that' place in
my heart, no one else will appeal to me at all.

If they have moved on, I would also.
But still it is a matter of someone catching
my attention, before I even know it :-)

This is the only life we get.
We can use it to find joy or wallow in sorrow.
I say, live it, wring every moment out of it.

In short, do it when it feels right :-)

For me the harder I fell for them the longer it takes.
Then I go into this thinking that I hate being in love and dating because its so hard when you break up and I enjoy not having the pressure of a relationship.

Then someone I really like comes along and I am right back in the saddle. There is no time frame for me.

Did any of this make sense?