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| Topic: Mental Health Hotline! | |
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Edited by
WonderWoman48
on
Wed 04/29/15 06:21 AM
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Hello and welcome to the mental health hotline.
If you are an obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5, and 6. If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want; stay on the line while we trace your call. If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transfered to the mother ship. If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press. If you are a manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer. If you are dyslexic, press 696969696969. If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the hash key until a representative comes on the line. If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's maiden name. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have post-traumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 911. If you have bi-polar disorder, please leave a message after the beep, or before the beep. Or after the beep. Or before the beep. Please wait for the beep. If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our operators are far too busy to talk to you. And thank you for calling the mental health hotline! Have a nice day! |
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Would you repeat that, I can't remember what you said!
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Can i just speak to the operator..?
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Can i just speak to the operator..? Hello and welcome to the mental health hotline. How can I help you? 
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When I read the title of this thread, I thought that Mingle2 had given out its telephone number.
  Mingle2's psych nurse |
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I used to have that as my voice mail greeting, WW.
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Edited by
TMommy
on
Wed 04/29/15 06:03 PM
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oooooooooo my god!!!!!
 I would so put this on my office door as a counselor 
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But, but, but...what if I fall into ALL those categories?
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But, but, but...what if I fall into ALL those categories? At the end of the message hang up and redial 14 times.
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