Hum? I guess that means I'm a smooth talker with social skills. LOL.

Back when I was talking to the ladies on the dating sites I didn't ask a lot of questions either. I like someone to converse with me. That way I can find out what I want to know a little at the time in the course of the conversation.

If you pay attention to peoples answers you can learn a lot from casual conversation . Maybe not state secrets but their general interests and personality.

If I have to pry conversation out of someone I figure they are hiding something and I loose interest.

If the questions are too generic I figure he is a scammer or someone who bought a bad how to date book. lol

Wouldn't surprise me. Problem is that many men have this MO, so I guess they don't get how effing irritating it is. Usually I can sort of guide it to another direction, but this one was tenacious. So I ended the conversation.

I think most never read a book on "how to date" at all. Some have such underdeveloped skills that they could benefit from even the worst "How to date" books.

No, I'm not an oddity. It's a general complaint of women. I've also seen this addressed by a dating guru because so many women bump into this.
Often men do this because they don't know what else to say. Then they seem happy if you can guide the conversation into another direction and stop asking question altogether. But sometimes you stumble upon an a-hole that goes on and on no matter what.
Firing question after question is not a sign of interest. It's rude.

i only have one (1) question to ask you Crystal...

What's your phone number ??

Sadly.. Some or most men do it....
So they don't have to much work.
( as far as putting time in, typing , emotional investment or revealing themselves emotionally etc).. Just like a lot of men in real life)


And so they can just agree with what the woman is saying.
Sad but true.
Many men out there assumes that is what women want.

Now that's a question that
- a girl can actually work with
- does show interest

.

In my experience...the best conversation starter goes something like this...


" I really wanted to tell you....umm how do I say this....it's just that....oh never mind it's not that important..just forget it."

And walk away, if she's interested at all she'll want to know and will follow you and ask you to finish...

if you had no Shot to begin with she'll just think you're another weirdo

Isaac, so now you are dating the baby sitter.

For 8 years now....
she is older than me...wouldn't consider her a babysitter though...unless you count when..*never mind keep it PG*..

I too am not slick at meeting strangers & ask questions to try to find common ground to start a conversation . Never let a stranger mess up your day ...... it may be your last one & it would be a shame being
mad at someone that is just stupid.

Aha. But the guy in the Sound of Music was teakwood not rosewood.
ok, ok, you are a big heart
but 8 years? it's like love overtaking life

Very well reasoned response. The reflective metaphor ( is metaphor? the correct descriptor - never mind- the potential comparison you offered at the end of your response is what I'm referring to) was very thought provoking and were I male and considered to have poor social skills as defined in this forum I would be indebted to you for putting forward some other points of view that might cause others to be less scathing of my potential social shortcomings...

So if not every man is thick as two planks and you do not wish to generalize...

Then do not ask the internet. Ask the Guy who seems to be thick as two planks.

Because the other 3,5 Billion men have no idea what the effing problem with that 1 Guy is.

Do not vent here, it´s the wrong tree to bark up.



So let me have a very subjective go at re-phrasing, simplifying what you experience.

I had that exchange on OKC more than once.
red a profile, saw common points, made some comments that kept the conversation going.
She never hooked on it, only answered questions. bored me.
Showed no interest of using her own braincells. no wish to contribute. no desire to play ball.
No reason to be mad... The convo just does not work.

So that Guy who asks questions is trying to start a car.
If the engine does not go after a while (subjective), he can either keep going in desperation, or give up.
If he keeps on asking, insisting, and contribute nothing to the conversation but silly questions that lead nowhere, just stop answering...
cause the engine won´t go.

It´s not a sign of interest. So far so good.
But it isn´t rude.
It´s a lack of sparks making the engine go, no matter the reason (stupidity, no common ground, maybe he is just dumb...)

Now blame the guy for a lack of sparks. go.

next time blame yourself for not discovering sooner that
-he does not EXCHANGE,
-does not bring himself into the discussion,
-does snot share,
-treats you like a future potential employee.

...and then stop that behavior BEFORE you get so flipping bored that you need to vent.

In one sense of the word, I understand what you are getting at. But in another, I feel like I'm missing the boat. Are you saying that a man shouldn't ask questions about you? Like I've already said, I never was one for asking a lot of questions. I prefer to learn as I go and ask questions as the subject comes up.

I got a lot of dates from different women. But I also lost many dates because they didn't like the fact that I didn't ask questions. Many seemed to want me, and other men to ask many questions. I did notice that a lot of these had very little info in their profile. A lot of them would usually have the same "two-word" profiles. "Just ask" OR, "Anything you want to know, "Just ask." So, When men come across this, they wind up asking question after question, just to get some info about the woman.

And with a lot of them, they want you to ask all these questions, but then it's like pulling teeth to get any info out of them. This is what I've seen after dealing with a lot of different women over the years.

you know what they say about a man of few words, don't you ?

his lips are too busy *makin' out ...to be asking question after question...

Well, there's questions and there's questions and there's also timing of them. Of course we all ask questions to learn more about someone. But I was talking about firing one question after the other. That's a different scenario.
There should be normal exchange of information, from both sides, and interest from both sides. And the occasional question from both sides. Not one side asking question after question without ever revealing anything about himself. That's an interview, not a conversation. Depending on the questions asked, it can become an interrogation instead of a nice conversation. And the latter is what many men do.
In your case, if you never ask anything, that's a sign of no real interest, so I can understand that not working out.

Is it me or did the temperature just go up?