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Topic: Correct dating etiquette
Chris325a's photo
Sat 11/12/16 08:21 PM
There are a lot of things most people do not know about as far as first dates and things that go further. So what would anyone like to share.. this is for men and women..I'll start. Sex on the first date is moving too fast but if both parties agree then it's not a date it becomes a quickie

no photo
Fri 11/18/16 01:26 AM
i dont think a quickie is wise and safe considering all the new viruses around. dating etiquette might mean who pays what , who decides where to go , how the date ends? but then i really dont have much experience with dating at all so dont mind me lol

SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Fri 11/18/16 02:13 AM
First date as in "Meet & Greet"?
Those shouldn't be too long. Most think they should spend an entire afternoon together, or have dinner together. Not smart.
A meet & greet should be short and sweet. Half an hour to an hour is long enough. It's just checking if there's a click, you don't need an entire afternoon for that. That would only make it awkward if there is no click.

Not having dinner together is for the same reasons. You don't want to be stuck with someone you clearly don't like or click with for some 2 hours over food. Desperately trying to make polite conversation. Horrible! Especially the moment the check arrives is going to be awkward in such a situation.

Apart from that, it can be good to have a bit of a plan. Not just sit at a table over coffees, but do something more active as well. A walk, shopping (just looking mostly) or whatever. That way you can find out much much more about the other and his likes and dislikes than whilst sat opposite each other at a table. That can quickly become awkward.

sparkyae5's photo
Fri 11/18/16 07:15 AM

First date as in "Meet & Greet"?
Those shouldn't be too long. Most think they should spend an entire afternoon together, or have dinner together. Not smart.
A meet & greet should be short and sweet. Half an hour to an hour is long enough. It's just checking if there's a click, you don't need an entire afternoon for that. That would only make it awkward if there is no click.

Not having dinner together is for the same reasons. You don't want to be stuck with someone you clearly don't like or click with for some 2 hours over food. Desperately trying to make polite conversation. Horrible! Especially the moment the check arrives is going to be awkward in such a situation.

Apart from that, it can be good to have a bit of a plan. Not just sit at a table over coffees, but do something more active as well. A walk, shopping (just looking mostly) or whatever. That way you can find out much much more about the other and his likes and dislikes than whilst sat opposite each other at a table. That can quickly become awkward.




YOU REALLY WANT TO LEARN ABOUT SOMEONE OBSERVE THEM AROUND FAMILY AND CLOSE

FRIENDS....THEY ALREADY KNOW THE SHORT CUTS TO ALL THE BUTTONS.......I USE IT

ALL THE TIME AND GET GREAT RESULTS......

inni_dreamz's photo
Fri 11/18/16 09:33 AM
In general?....

Meet at a public place, tell someone where you are going and give them as much information about the other person as you can.

Decide ahead if you are going dutch, to avoid any awkwardness at the end - if it's a meal, etc.

To each their own, but I think having sex on the first date is way too fast.

The rest is just having manners, like chew with your mouth closed, go to the restroom if you need to fart, don't steal the silverware....

dobermangal's photo
Sat 11/19/16 01:53 AM
LOL..don't steal the silverware...

sparkyae5's photo
Sun 11/20/16 07:54 AM

There are a lot of things most people do not know about as far as first dates and things that go further. So what would anyone like to share.. this is for men and women..I'll start. Sex on the first date is moving too fast but if both parties agree then it's not a date it becomes a quickie


YOU JUST MET THE OTHER PERSON, ASIDE FROM STD'S IT WILL ALWAYS CHANGE THE

SITUATION.....IF YOUR LOOKING FOR A LOVING CARING RELATIONSHIP ITS BEST TO TAKE

YOUR TIME AND GET TO KNOW THEM AND THEN YOU MAY NOT WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH THEM

AFTER ALL....

msharmony's photo
Sun 11/20/16 08:05 AM

In general?....

Meet at a public place, tell someone where you are going and give them as much information about the other person as you can.

Decide ahead if you are going dutch, to avoid any awkwardness at the end - if it's a meal, etc.

To each their own, but I think having sex on the first date is way too fast.

The rest is just having manners, like chew with your mouth closed, go to the restroom if you need to fart, don't steal the silverware....



more stellar adviceflowerforyou

I dont think there is a proper dating etiquette besides having manners

the rest is a matter of individual style and compatibility,, I dont want peopl putting on the 'proper' show for me,, I do want them to be polite and considerate, but otherwise be themselves,,,,that way we can know more quicky whether there is compatibility that can be maintained

I personally have my personal standard against sex before Love or introducing anyone to my daughter before getting to know them (not the first date)

Rooster35's photo
Sun 11/20/16 09:01 AM
I think CrystalFairy nailed it when she suggested not to make a meet&greet last longer than necessary. It goes with my belief of being yourself and not drag it beyond the reasonably short'n'sweet. It shouldn't take more than 5mins to figure out if you're going to like the person or not.

IgorFrankensteen's photo
Sun 11/20/16 10:14 AM

There are a lot of things most people do not know about as far as first dates and things that go further. So what would anyone like to share.. this is for men and women..I'll start. Sex on the first date is moving too fast but if both parties agree then it's not a date it becomes a quickie


I'll take some issue with that. I agree that sex too son is problematic for most people, I think you make a mistake as soon as you choose only ONE person's viewpoint, as being "what the date was." Insisting that any instance of sex on the first date is just a "quickie," ignores that both people have a say in what something does or doesn't mean.

My own small advice accordingly, is to know yourself. Especially, know what ASSUMPTIONS you are prone to make about the other person, owing to your own past experiences, and try not to assume incorrectly.


no1phD's photo
Sun 11/20/16 11:21 AM
Dating etiquette..
Shower and shave.. put on cologne or aftershave are perfume.
Dress nice.
Be on time..
If you're drinking keep it to a minimal of 2..
Be polite..
Catch up on world affairs..ie Read a newspaper the day before..
Don't try to be too clever or too smart..
Nobody likes a know-it-all..
Let the other person carry some of the conversation..
Look them in the eyes when talking with each other..
Show interest in what they're saying even if you're not...
If you really like them a small touch on their hand is appropriate..
Make sure they get to their vehicle safely...
. If you enjoyed the date let them know.. a hug or appropriate kiss would suffice.
If you did not enjoy the date don't be ignorant.. thank them for their time..
And just let them know it's not a match..


LewisW123's photo
Sun 11/20/16 11:29 AM

Dating etiquette..
Shower and shave.. put on cologne or aftershave are perfume.
Dress nice.
Be on time..
If you're drinking keep it to a minimal of 2..
Be polite..
Catch up on world affairs..ie Read a newspaper the day before..
Don't try to be too clever or too smart..
Nobody likes a know-it-all..
Let the other person carry some of the conversation..
Look them in the eyes when talking with each other..
Show interest in what they're saying even if you're not...
If you really like them a small touch on their hand is appropriate..
Make sure they get to their vehicle safely...
. If you enjoyed the date let them know.. a hug or appropriate kiss would suffice.
If you did not enjoy the date don't be ignorant.. thank them for their time..
And just let them know it's not a match..




Well said. I like all of them.

Also, it's o.k. to catch up on world affairs, but maybe avoid politics on the first date.laugh

no photo
Sun 11/20/16 03:12 PM

Dating etiquette..
Shower and shave.. put on cologne or aftershave are perfume.
Dress nice.
Be on time..
If you're drinking keep it to a minimal of 2..
Be polite..
Catch up on world affairs..ie Read a newspaper the day before..
Don't try to be too clever or too smart..
Nobody likes a know-it-all..
Let the other person carry some of the conversation..
Look them in the eyes when talking with each other..
Show interest in what they're saying even if you're not...
If you really like them a small touch on their hand is appropriate..
Make sure they get to their vehicle safely...
. If you enjoyed the date let them know.. a hug or appropriate kiss would suffice.
If you did not enjoy the date don't be ignorant.. thank them for their time..
And just let them know it's not a match..



the date guru shades

no photo
Sun 11/20/16 05:03 PM
On a first date, don't talk about either of your exes.

LewisW123's photo
Sun 11/20/16 05:12 PM
Edited by LewisW123 on Sun 11/20/16 05:14 PM

On a first date, don't talk about either of your exes.


Yeah, and as little as possible AFTER the first date.

yellowrose10's photo
Sun 11/20/16 05:17 PM
IMO the correct dating advice is be yourself. Whatever that is. There really isn't a protocol

no photo
Sun 11/20/16 05:21 PM
I agree, yellowrose. Be yourself.

no photo
Mon 11/21/16 06:45 AM
Correct dating etiquette

is simply conforming to socialized polite behavior in a setting or atmosphere that could easily be sexually charged.

Attempting to fulfill the other persons expectations of polite behavior while still attempting to communicate sexual/mating interest in a way you believe the other person will find acceptable and be comfortable with, i.e. expect.

There are a lot of things most people do not know about as far as first dates and things

which is a shame and IMO mostly the fault of parents and stupid people that say "don't worry about dating yet! Focus on school, your education, get a job, don't worry about it!"

Also, due to people saying things like "be yourself!"

There's no real such thing as "being yourself" in dating.
At best that is only saying "don't be aware of what you do and how it affects others, don't consider other people at all, just react, and if it doesn't work out it's their problem, you were just yourself!"

You are an animal. "Yourself" is ultimately fulfilling id appetites by any means possible, then fighting against the consequences, preferably by finding others, ganging up, and attacking them with superior numbers.

You are socialized, trained, in how to behave towards others in a group.
Figure out what your training is, and find someone similar.

If you don't know a lot about dating it means you a. didn't have adequate social feedback during the process of when you first started dating which should have been by your teen years.
b. don't do it very much, which means you weren't pushed to do it, nor was it facilitated for you, by your primary social group.

The best thing you can do to overcome that failing is to date in groups, go out with friends and multiple people, and retrain yourself based on what you experience with them.



carefulwisher's photo
Mon 11/21/16 01:45 PM
Propriety on the first date leaves a lasting good impression.

Three or four times when I was young, a woman and I were mutually thunderstruck at first sight, such that we decided to skip any preliminaries, formalities, or any further delay. I'm not sure whether to count that street hooker in '78 whose proposition I accepted but who forgot to ask for payment.

Nice memories. But in no case did it ever develop into anything lasting in a romantic sense. Fortunately, not in an infectious sense either surprised

no photo
Tue 11/22/16 07:52 AM
Edited by HZ67 on Tue 11/22/16 07:53 AM
If it's a meet & greet, the two people definitely should meet at a public place, maybe for coffee. Then if it doesn't work out, you are not stuck there for very long.

I think first meet or if it's an actual first date, be yourself & have manners & show respect. For me...sex on a first date isn't good. I don't know him at all just from a first date & I'd like to end up in a relationship.

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