There comes a time when you say, "You don't get to hear about that anymore."
"EVEN" when...though you are also our children's parent. I will not speak ill of you. I love you for them.
but you will no longer have any respected
Personal Opinion about my personal life that I will consider."

Btw, I'm just asking and don't have children. Just trying to understand more.

So what's the question?

My high school English Comp teacher would've written "frag" all over the original post.

Is "frag" Japanese for "flag"?

Humm once you sign the dotted line~~~ and you decide it is time to move on sometimes it just happens... With me it was the day I sent him packing...At that point he was not a part of my life anymore nor was it his business what I did. Once one gets past the hurt, then you learn to move on. Once you get pissed, it makes you finally realize they were not worth all the pain or your time...and when you realize it was just not meant to be, it makes it easier to move on...


As far as when kids are involved it is hard... But I never believed that regardless what happens it is not something to get the kids involved... There are somethings that should not be discussed with the kids as far as details.. If they were to ask later in life then I would tell them the truth but there is never a need to bash the other parent in front of them... It is hard on them too no reason to add to it..Now as far as what the kids do that is different always share those things when you can..

I couldn't have said it any better.

(No, it's short for "fragment of a sentence; not a complete one". Sometimes I'd get papers back with that written on them.)

At what point does your ex-partner no longer have a say in your personal life..?..
When you decide that what they have to say no longer matters I guess...

Of course you will always value their opinion.. but it will no longer have a influence on your choices.. over what you do...

If the question is: At what point does your ex-partner no longer have a say in your personal life..?..

Then indeed what Nr 1 says: When you decide that what they have to say no longer matters ...

When that is will vary. Some may feel like that right away, others will need more time to sever emotional bonds.

If I was a parent who did not have custody of my children, yes I would want to know that their home environment was safe for them. Apart from that, well that is simply nosey and unacceptable.

An ex has no opinion on my personal life!

This is the core of the right answer.

Something to take in stride, so to speak, is that people in relationships long enough to have children together, tend to get into the habit of letting each other know when they disapprove of the other's behavior, and to critique how they conduct their lives. It's a difficult habit to break, once it has some years of practice behind it.

I was married for over twenty years, and my ex still occasionally launches into detailed instructions for how I should do all sorts of things. I developed a gentle way to deflect her, because I have no desire to go back in time emotionally myself, and re-fight old battles.

We HAVE TO coordinate about the children. But exactly HOW we do that even, is going to have to be based on how each of us want to handle each challenge, and wont be subject to doing what each other say to do.

In my case, one of the reasons why my marriage failed,was because my now ex DID insist on directing every detail of how I did anything. You name it, I had to park the car the way she wanted it done, I had to conduct phone conversations following her formats, and so on. So I have twenty years of annoyance to make sure I don't carry forward.

There's a reason spouses with children tend to try to dictate behavior. It is because one spouse has a different idea of how their children should be raised than the way the other spouse thinks.

My X thinks it is okay to do drugs around the children.
Personally, that is not an influence I wanted my children to adopt.
Before I had children, I was a partier. I enjoyed smoking a bud once in awhile. I gave it up because I didn't want our children growing up in a family that used drugs. She thought it was cool. I saw it as immature.

I havd to step back when I witnessed her doing the same thing while my grandchildren were around. I talked with my kids and two were with me and two were not. The two that are not are my oldest two.
This is because she convinced them that drugs are not bad.

This is just one example of many that caused me to "Cut Ties" with the X. Her immaturity and disrespect makes me angry. One of the few things in like that does.
I don't try to control her, she can do whatever she wants. I just want her to control herself while she is in the presence of our family.

As for personal opinions, I stopped having them about her BEFORE we even separated. The kids were already out of the house and making their own lives. The last time I saw her, she was still trying to nose in on my life. Thing is, I didn't let it phase me and that just pist her off even more, makes me laugh.