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Topic: A crazy situation
jazzinc's photo
Fri 03/02/18 07:25 AM
A man in his 60's was asked by a "lady" in her 50's...to make a baby as soon as possible!!!she desires to have a baby(her first and the last one)
..but the "potential dad"...has grandkids already!!!

He doesn't know what to do

what is your advice to this crazy couple?

Tom4Uhere's photo
Fri 03/02/18 07:51 AM
Its not fair to the child.

My dad was 49 when I was conceived.
My mom was 40 when I was born.
My parents had 3 previous children that died at birth.
My sister was their 4th child, I was their 5th.
Both were alcoholics.

I understand that everyone is different.

My mom and dad were not active for my childhood.
As early as 8 years old I was already expecting my dad to die.
I was basically raised by my sister (8 years older).

I grew up with very little physical activity.
Their parenting was based on the 1940s lifestyle.
The generation gap between us was too big and caused conflicts.

Times change.
While people are still active into their 70s now it is still unlikely a child will get the nurturing needed to function in their society.

Women in their 50s still able to produce offspring are few and far between. Most hit menopause in their 40s.
It is unlikely a woman will want to "make" a baby in her 50s, but it could happen. Anything is possible, even viable eggs.
The more likely scenario is that they adopt a child.

The average male lives to around 78.
However, how much of those 18 years are active enough to properly raise a child?

LeeFranklin's photo
Fri 03/02/18 07:51 AM
Go for it.

jazzinc's photo
Fri 03/02/18 08:54 AM

Go for it.


Could you tell us a little bit more about your answer,please?. It would be appreciated.

thanks

no1phD's photo
Fri 03/02/18 09:32 AM

A man in his 60's was asked by a "lady" in her 50's...to make a baby as soon as possible!!!she desires to have a baby(her first and the last one)
..but the "potential dad"...has grandkids already!!!

He doesn't know what to do

what is your advice to this crazy couple?
...
I think at the age of 60 and 50 your child rearing days are behind you......
Unless you're okay with leaving... young kids in the world without parents....

It's a simple question of numbers..

no photo
Fri 03/02/18 09:49 AM



Different strokes for different folks..live and let live..it's really not for me to say..not to mention there really isn't that much info given..so yea they're a bit aged..I hope they're good parents..for as long as they're around..

To me it doesn't matter the age just as long as they love and care for their child for their time remaining..because we've seen parents who were much younger who just plain and simply SUCK

Don't let age be the bias ..but whether they Love and care for the child is of the most importance...spock


no photo
Fri 03/02/18 10:39 AM
I am in that age group and can't even imagine why someone would want to be in their 70's or 80's by the time their kid gets out of college.


jazzinc's photo
Fri 03/02/18 11:05 AM

I am in that age group and can't even imagine why someone would want to be in their 70's or 80's by the time their kid gets out of college.


you are right! For me; that couple is very crazy; the grandpa is hearing too much about the obsession of that fertile lady. Totally unconscious and senseless. But; each person decide what to do in life at his/her risk.

yellowrose10's photo
Fri 03/02/18 11:08 AM
Exactly. It is their life. Personally I wouldn't do it, but that is my life

msharmony's photo
Fri 03/02/18 11:19 AM
I think it depends upon the health of both parties. In this day and age, there are 'older' people that are in excellent shape/health and will be for AT LEAST another 18 years.

I think it also depends upon their commitment to the child. I feel it is selfish, quite honestly, to bring a child into the world with no plan for them to have a mother and father to raise them.

I dont think its wise to just use sperm or egg 'donors' as a means to an ends, but thats just my opinion. I feel a man and a woman should be in a loving commitment before laying down and bringing a new life into the world, and then they should be in loving commitment to raising the child together.

also , just my opinion.

Toodygirl5's photo
Fri 03/02/18 01:04 PM
If he is 60+ he should know what to do! And how to do it. laugh

no photo
Fri 03/02/18 01:45 PM
Personally I think it’s selfish.

Kids are hard work and no matter how fit you are, when you’re in your 50,s and 60,s it would be even harder.
That’s besides the chance of the child being left without parents at a young age being increased.

90was's photo
Fri 03/02/18 02:15 PM
If they feel they could still be good mentors and parents, why not become babysitters for people who have a hard time getting daycare or volunteer at a facility which provides daycare? That way they are around kids and get a break from them too, so they don't have that constant pressure of responsibility.

Does that make sense to anyone out there?

no photo
Fri 03/02/18 07:07 PM
what is your advice to this crazy couple?

Are they a couple? For how long?
Because "A man...was asked by a 'lady'...to make a baby..."
makes it seem like some random woman asked some random guy.

He doesn't know what to do

Why?
Why exactly does he not want to have a kid?
Or why exactly can't he tell her yes, or no?
Is he being asked by a stranger?
Is there a relationship and this is an ultimatum? "Get me pregnant or it's over!"
What does her doctor say? Can she get pregnant? What are the health risks?
Does he just not want to raise a kid?

What questions is he asking himself?
Why can't he work together with her?
Why won't she listen to him?
Why did she not, or does not, understand why he doesn't know what to do?

What could online strangers offer that a physician and/or a couples councilor couldn't?


jazzinc's photo
Sat 03/03/18 03:19 AM

what is your advice to this crazy couple?

Are they a couple? For how long?
Because "A man...was asked by a 'lady'...to make a baby..."
makes it seem like some random woman asked some random guy.

He doesn't know what to do

Why?
Why exactly does he not want to have a kid?
Or why exactly can't he tell her yes, or no?
Is he being asked by a stranger?
Is there a relationship and this is an ultimatum? "Get me pregnant or it's over!"
What does her doctor say? Can she get pregnant? What are the health risks?
Does he just not want to raise a kid?

What questions is he asking himself?
Why can't he work together with her?
Why won't she listen to him?
Why did she not, or does not, understand why he doesn't know what to do?

What could online strangers offer that a physician and/or a couples councilor couldn't?




Too many answers for so many questions as a part of a topic.Too much analysis and details.You posted only questions;no answer(s). Thanks anyway.

no photo
Sat 03/03/18 04:49 AM
This is almost like a situation I watched the other day on the show "Empty Nest".

In that case Dr. Weston said no, to the lady asking him. Mostly because he already had 3 daughters, 1 grand child on the way. But he also didn't want to go back to trying to raise another kid.

RustyKitty's photo
Sat 03/03/18 10:11 AM

A man in his 60's was asked by a "lady" in her 50's...to make a baby as soon as possible!!!she desires to have a baby(her first and the last one)
..but the "potential dad"...has grandkids already!!!

He doesn't know what to do

what is your advice to this crazy couple?

I would advise the dude to run fast - in the other direction.
I would advise the lady to volunteer to work somewhere with kids - hospital for sick children; a daycare; be a babysitter... somewhere where she can fulfil a desire to be near children.

Toodygirl5's photo
Sat 03/03/18 01:45 PM

LOL where are the 'age is just a number' folks?


laugh laugh

no photo
Sat 03/03/18 03:46 PM
Just say "no".

markc48's photo
Sat 03/03/18 07:47 PM

A man in his 60's was asked by a "lady" in her 50's...to make a baby as soon as possible!!!she desires to have a baby(her first and the last one)
..but the "potential dad"...has grandkids already!!!

He doesn't know what to do. Get a vasectomy and have fun. laugh

what is your advice to this crazy couple?

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