how do you deal with family and friends not being accepting on how you met someone online? what if they start freaking out, thinking you are nuts, etc...i am sure this has ran through most of our minds, what if we found "the one" how do we explain this to others and how do we react when they dont understand it?

It's not as hard as you think. I used to live with someone (for 5 years) that I'd met online. And, if your relatives give you any kind of grief...tell them you know of a person who has a first cousin (this is true and it's my first cousin), who has a Ph.d in Physics and he met his wife from online and they have a great marriage and a little boy now. It can work for some. Even though my relationship didn't work, that doesn't mean I wouldn't try again.

wow - that's actaully a pretty loaded question, 'cuz it goes to the whole online dating thing in the first place...

If they're just watching out for you, then be kind.. if they're just being judgemental, well, maybe not so kind... haha...

if you find "the one" and have never personally met them... then that's a little nuts... to me (this is where we get into the whole online philosophy), online is just another medium to meet people or to socialize a little... you don't REALLY know them 'till you meet them, see them in a group setting, etc...

We're ALL cool online - only some of us (like me... hehe) are cool in person too!

i get alot of garbage from some about even being on this site. they are saying that anyone who is looking for someone online must have something wrong with them. then i say to them, what is wrong with me, they of course reply nothing and my answer to that is ,...well....see.

I think your friends will love it...
Family will think you hooked up with a stalker serial killer. I would use the place where you got together....Tom and I met at a coffee shop and we really had an instant connection....

and its true thats where you went....details much later if needed..

i do not care about the familey on this. i do what i want. i have done this sence 16 i wiil not let them controll my life. it is my life.!!!!!!!

I've never cared what my family and friends thought about who I was dating- or how I met them- but I guess if you do, just tell them you're being careful to meet them in a public place- if you meet them at all. To me, meeting a jerk online is the same as meeting a jerk at work/school or whatever, but many people don't see it that way. It amuses me when people say only weirdos and serial killers are online, when the majority of the people assaulted by those people met them in real life, not on here.

A lot of people -- especially people who don't know anything about dating sites, or people whose only experiences have been with nakedrectalcloseup.com and sites like that, see the whole genre as sleazy and desperate.

And huge segments of it are.

But, unless you've tried a site like JSH and seen the community aspect, the bonds that form, the friendships, the things that happen when people actually get to know each other (albeit in a long-distance way), you'll never realize how much a site like this one can fill in so many gaps in people's lives.

I don't really give a damn what anybody thinks.

I've met 9 people from dating sites, and I'll be the first to admit that 8 of them were disasters that made the Hindenberg looked like a stubbed toe. (It did sort of look like a toe before it got all deflated and burned up.) But that 9th one was something entirely different, and there's still something going on there. So it's not always horrible.

And some people are just too busy to devote a lot of time to meeting people in the "traditional" ways. And some of us are in situations where meeting someone on line is the only option we have.

What's the point of having technology? To make people's lives better and easier and more efficient. OK, meeting someone on line can do that. People used to put ads in the paper; how is a dating site any different other than being better in about two dozen ways?

Today, in whatever year this is, we have options they didn't have 100 years ago. Might as well take advantage of that.

I prefer meeting people online to real life because this medium gives you more control. If a guy acts retarded online, I have the block button and all that, in real life you might have to file a restraining order. Plus you can't catch anything through a screen. :)

Madam you're a grown up woman. You don't need to explain yourself to anyone. If you find happiness on-line your family and friends should be happy for you. I'd be happy for ya.

Who cares what your friends or family think......once you actually meet the person and or start dating that person, it all comes down to whether or not you are compatible. The same happens in real life...

If you really care what they think, lie. Tell them you met the guy somewhere in real life, like a bookstore or something. Just make sure you tell him to agree, otherwise it might get weird.

my thoughts are this too...i could meet a man at a bar or the store, i still dont know him from adam at that point either, so does it matter where you meet him? everyone is a stranger at first.

~~OBVIOUSLY THEY LOVE U AND THEY DONT WANT TO SEE U GET HURT, JUST SLOWLY BUT SURELY IF U FEEL HE IS THE ONE, BRING HIM IN SO THE FAMILY CAN KNOW HOW HE IS~~

Exactly. I think the main problem is, people hear about pedophiles and serial rapists who target their prey online, so it becomes stigmatized. Also, most people who don't trust the internet don't use it so they don't know what it's like.

Your family is just concerned, but in the long run, it won't matter where you meet someone if the relationship works out!!

I met my last serious lover online, however not on a "dating" site (we met through our mutual websites) and I felt really weird about telling folks just exactly how we met. Whether we like it or not, meeting someone online IS different. There are different dynamics and a certain unrealistic expectation in such relationships. Had my last serious lover and I been able to overcome the physical distance between us and continued in the direction we were going---long-term and so-very-serious---I would have insisted on crafting an alternative "how we met" story.

***************

Online "dating" is also notorious for not working out. It's gotten a bad rap (justifiably so).

It's never worked for me. However, I have crappy taste in men- yep, I admit it- so the blame doesn't fall entirely on the internet. It would be the same in real life too. :)

eliminate the negative people from your life..even if it's family...they eventually learn to be positive around you...

or you have less(no) contact with them...

it is truly liberating!

i think its actually becoming normal these days to have to travel to see your boyfriend/girlfriend... (whom you met online). i do know that some people judge, but... hmmmm... oh well...