I treat my son as he treats me... if he is rude and disrespectful, well... when I hear "mommmmmmmmmmm I need money" or Mommmmmmmmmmmmmmm I needa ride.... well.. i just let my rude and disrespectful self let him see how it feels... Let me tell you.... his attitude improved real fast!!!

I grew up Irish /catholic- you got your ass beat, anytime you acted up, which didn't happen often, but in a way I'm a better person... sounds weird but true...

how bout a BELT on his a$$. Or is that still illegal?

A cell phone has nothing to do with it at all. There are alot of children, including both of mine, that have cell phones. Yes, come kids cannot handle having their cell phone taken away from them so they do not misbehave in fear of that, then there are some who could care less. When my children are in trouble for whatever reason, there will be no going anywhere extra. We will sit in the house all week/end if we need too, just to get the point across. They want to act up, hell they are doing me a favor, maybe then I can rest and relax for a minute!!! I do not take the cell phone though in case they need to reach me and they are not at home to do so.

Good Luck on your problem though...

you mean the deadbeat of a dad the only time he wants anything to do with the kids is when its at holidays. Or if i decide to call and see if they want to get them. Im tired of catering to the father i wish he would give his rights away. he doesnt call or anything

it really hasnt been that long since he started this. Whats cazy is that he is an A student in school hes really not a bad child its just his mouth has gotten him into trouble lately by me. hes pretty much one of the popular/jock students in jr high and the dipping hes picked up from his friends. ive only caught him once.

Try applying the Board of Education to the Seat of Knowledge.

Both my sons went through bad phases. I feel for you. Just try to love him through it and grit your teeth when it gets real bad. I'd do as already suggested. Don't give him rides or favors til he can treat you with respect. If's it's really out of hand, maybe get an uncle or grandfather to talk to him.

That's right....dad will kick his ass

Why does everyone always blame the absent parent? The problem is you!! Obviously you didn't make them treat you with respect or he wouldn't be acting the way he does. Sure all kids TRY to cross that line BUT you as that parent should have stopped it before it even started!!
I am a single mother of two boys, so trust me I do understand that it is very hard raising your children on your own. BUT you have to demand their respect, IF they don't respect you then you start taking away things that they enjoy. They don't get the rights to anything. NO cell phones, no home phone, no going out, no driving the car, no friends in the house, and so on. Little by little you take every single thing they enjoy, TRUST ME they will change. If they don't, then you keep taking things away until they do change! Sure your life might be hell, but their life will be even worse!!
I must say that my son is now 19 and he turned out to be a very respectable young man. He goes to Purdue in Ft. Wayne and I always get comments about how polite he is and what a good kid he is!! So you do what you have to!!!
Good luck

wow, ive seen some good stuff and some really bad advice on here, kneeling on rice and cans of beans being just a couple.

On the other hand though, communication, communication, communication.

Talking to kids is like talking to anyone else, when you talk down to them, or portray this attitude of superiority then it all goes down hill from there.

If he's the jock/smart kids at school he's filling his 'oats' as it were, he see's himself as being a leader at school and with his friends, and is doing nothing but trying to show you right now that he thinks you guys are equals.

I would just talk to the kid, the way you would talk to an adult, blunt honest, and two way conversation. letting him know that yes he's growing up and soon mommy wont be needed at all, you understand that but in the mean time theres you and him, and he needs to find away to deal with that reality.


about the dipping, yeah I got popped by my dad, eat the cann for a first offense, buti dont think thats cool. but you could ask him to see how big a dip he can put in, encourage a biger and bigger and bigger one. at some point he will turn green, the room will spin and he'll start sweatin' its a beautiful site. just do it every time you think he has a can on him, i promise he wont dip in front of you anymore.

Girl, I know exactly how you feel. I have a 13 yr old that does the same, except for the dipping part.
You feel like beating them but even that does no good. I feel like you... what do you do?
I have been advised to send mine to boot camp. I just don't know.

depending on where you live. You used to be able to backhand them too about 20 years ago. At least i remeber that. but not any more . where i live you go to jail for hitting a kid in the face.
I feel that is what is worng with the generation of kids now. they haven't had their ass whooped like they should and now the parents have to deal with all the disrespect and bull. It isn't fair at all.

It is sooo hard to not say anything when they back talk you and say things that are really hurtful and disrespectful. I am a single mom of a 13 yr old and the "sperm donor " is no where to be found. SO that is a big problem for me as to have a positive male influence in my child's life.

I have a great kid. Is a straight A student, doesn't talk back, is respectful, and participates in sports. Guess what? Has never been spanked!!

IS HE ROBOT?

Nope, my child is funny and caring. We have a blast!

thank you so much for your input. I agree whole heartedly with your comments. the law doeas tie our hands with what we can do as a parent.It really is not fair but we have to comply with the laws.

to you
obviously you have had the perfect situation for raising your child. You haven;t had interferring family members or abusive people in your life. it is wonderful that you have had such a relationship with your kid and i give you all props for that one. In reality though, it doesnt always happen like we want it to. I wanted what you have when i had my child but life and the descisions and mistakes that i made , it didnt happen. My kid is not the serial killer or something. He is a good kid he just has his moments where i want to beat him. lol
With God, all things are possible and it will work out.

military acadamy