Lesbian dating advice: Tips for success 

Lesbian dating can come with its own set of challenges. What do you do? What do you say? Many of us grow up with a lack of exposure to what same-sex dating entails. When the time comes, there might be some questions.

2 lesbian women dating and sitting on a chair
Photo by RODNAE Productions from Pexels

Here are a few tips for success for how to date the woman of your dreams. 

Take the initiative 

It can be scary to have to make the first move, but if you like someone, you really should do it. It doesn’t have to be anything elaborate – a message through the dating site or app, a simple note saying hi, or anything else can work. This helps get the ball rolling and seeing how the other person feels about a date. None of the top dating sites offer mind reading as a function yet, and in the absence of verbal signals. Clear communication is essential.

Be clear about what you want 

A clear message is a great way to set expectations. For many lesbian or bisexual women, there is sometimes a bigger concern to get their intentions across and make sure they are reading the situation right. They want a date and want to make sure what’s being set up. Be clear about what you want and offer a specific option. Like a coffee, movies, or a walk in the park. If you are looking for something more casual or something more serious, it’s also a good idea to establish the expectations from the get-go.

Prepare yourself for the date 

A good idea is to do something that will boost your confidence. Find an outfit that makes you feel attractive and gorgeous. Get the mentality for success. And calm the pre-date jitters by doing something you enjoy, something that relaxes you. It might not get you completely calm, but it should help you show up ready to start 

Ask questions 

People usually like talking about themselves, so you can start by asking questions. Don’t be afraid to make some creative ones. It can push the date off of the rails of the boring conversation topics and help everyone be more authentic. Listen closely and focus and your date will tell you a lot about herself. 

Don’t fake it 

If you feel nervous or are unsure, say so! It’s not a deal-breaker. It’s likely to help your date feel more comfortable and can help you show how much you care about the situation. You don’t have to present a specific facade in order to be successful.

Get consent and set expectations 

If you are looking for something serious, say so. If you want a casual hook-up, say so. Make sure the other woman is on the same page and you can have fun together. Consent matters for all situations, from sexual to less sexual things, like kissing or hugging. It shows you as someone who respects your partner, and that’s always attractive.

Overall, allow yourself to be who you are, have fun, and communicate. That will make any date a success.

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