Community > Posts By > iamAsel

 
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Sun 08/06/17 05:20 AM
If you respect her, be honest with her. End it first. But if you are ending it because you "LIKE" your friend more that's ridiculous. There has to be deeper meaning than that. And how are you so sure you wont "Like" another that friend of yours? It has to do with your morals and beliefs and dispositions in life. But it's a free world for everyone just be responsible in things you do and be brave enough to stand on your decisions.

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Mon 07/31/17 09:38 AM
It was the shortest of all my relatinships, but iy was the wildest and the most fun. The ending is not so good but he got to go. He chose to go. He says he will come back but i won't wait. :blush:

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Sat 07/29/17 05:42 AM

for me the younger the better because young ones have more passion and fresher.but i dont mind dating an older lady


I guess most guys prefer younger partners.

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Thu 07/20/17 07:46 AM

A woman in her late 30s who is anxious to have kids, may have to understand that her 25 year old bf may not be in such a hurry, regardless of how loudly her biological clock is ticking.

A twenty something year old woman or man may discover that their vibrant fiftysomething year old bf/gf may be a lot less vibrant or healthy 20 years down the road at 70 than they were in their 50s,

In other words, people have to be aware that a shift in age is often accompanied by a sharp shift in priority, and a couple needs to be onthe same page where their priorities in life are concerned.

People should be with whoever makes them happy (once its legal), but its important to have an awareness of the common age gap incompata bilities that could sabotage the longevity of a relationship (if longevity is something that both parties are hoping for.





This is quite real. When i was youger like 20 until before i reach 30, i can say i love to have fun and dont care abt the world or my future whether i'll marry have kids or stay with a person i can call SO but as i reach my maturity like when i came to my thirties, i started to realize, and based on experiences that younger men or most youger men wants to have fun and ot be serious but older guys atleast the majority are thinking about their plans five years or 10 years from now. Although some prefer to still have fun. But i cant speak for women who has 60-65 yr old bf. I dunno but whenever i see one i cant seem to think of a good reason why she's dating a MUCH older guys, mostly rich guys of course. I rarely see you ger men dating a much older women. But it mightbe true for both gender i guess.

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Thu 07/20/17 07:38 AM

Well, it's never REALLY been about age. It's always been about compatibility of goals and lifestyles and tastes.

But since people change as they gain experience, and become more certainly themselves, age has always worked as a sort of quick-check, to sort away some of the more obvious bad matches.

I've found that there are basically two kinds of people who want to ignore age. There are of course the predators, who want to ignore age because they want to chase the most innocent and inexperienced people they can find, and use them for selfish entertainment. But the larger group is the ones who haven't really thought things through all that thoroughly.

I know that I can get along extremely well with anyone whose been through enough life to understand that nothing is easy or simple, and who have learned about themselves thoroughly enough that they are stable and honest. But I also realize that a thirty year old woman is unlikely to find a sixty-three year old not rich guy's life fulfilling enough to commit the dedication and work needed to make a go of things.

Basically, I do agree that age is only indirectly linked to real compatibility, but it's still true that in a larger sense, it IS a real concern.


Makes sense.

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Thu 07/20/17 12:55 AM
A friend told me before that if you divide your age in half plus seven years, that's minimum age anyone can get to date can get to date. Interesting isn't it?

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Tue 07/18/17 08:22 AM
My relationships went from a 7-year older than me to a 4-year & 9-year younger than what my age today. All have different levels of challenges and excitement. Can't say one is better than the rest but, i have never had an "almost same age as mine" thing. For me it doesn't matter what the age is as long as you are complimenting each other. What about you, what your point of view? Anything we can learn from your experiences? Feel free to comment! :v_tone2:

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Tue 07/18/17 08:10 AM


my ex husband is white


Yeah, sure. He's white NOW. What color was he before he became your ex?

Just kidding.

Growing up where I did, mostly in the South, but with a strong foreign element, I found that inter-ANYTHING relationships could be tricky or easier. The racism around me was so intense in those days was a big problem. Everyone hated everyone, and everyone thought they were oh-so-wonderful themselves. There could be more cultural differences between two Americans, than there was between people from different parts of the world entirely.

I guess the main thing I would be concerned about, is that I've seen some cases where the reason why two people THOUGHT they were a perfect fit for each other, was because both of them thought that the reason for each other's behavior was something other than what it was. Such as thinking that someone is always doing things for you because they care so deeply about you, and discovering later that what was really going on, was that they were culturally certain that you were their PROPERTY, and that they had to do everything for you, because you are naturally simple-minded.

It's all part of the overall lesson that it's the WHY of things, which determines how a relationship will go, more than the WHAT of things.


You have a point. It might be on a case to case basis or depends on the situation, environment, etc etc. Can we say that if you dont really care about the people around you or what everyone has to say and think, it mught really work. It worked for many people.

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Tue 07/18/17 08:07 AM
There's no harm in trying. Much luck to you. Hopefully u get to find what you're looking for.

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Thu 07/13/17 09:50 PM
I don't think it will work out. You have to be committed and contented. I guess that's the main goal. This may run but not for long, i mean like if you are wishing for a solid and lasting relationship, it wont work.

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Wed 07/12/17 11:11 AM
Not really undateable but sometimes that feeling of getting tired of the process. It's like there are a thousand options on who to date u cant seem to choose for the one that fits your taste.

And the there are days when you feel you're old and grumpy and slow and ugly. Lol!

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Tue 07/11/17 07:54 AM


Thinking or having a relationship with other nationality, what are your challenges? Thoughts?


If you fall in love with someone it doesn't matter what nationality they are in my opinion. Some of the challenges can be religious differences, certain faiths require conversion to a common faith within a marriage, or families can request it before giving their blessing, so you may need to think about your own faith and the future relationship with both families.


Makes sense.

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Mon 07/10/17 06:26 PM

I eant seriously relationship


Younglawyer34 you shouln't just be saying it. Act on it. It's like you are declarig and shouting that you are hungry but if don't go and look for food, then how's it gonna be?

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Mon 07/10/17 06:23 PM

Nothing wrong with interacial relationships. You just have to respect the cultural differences and sensitivities ,.and prepare for some of the racial insults or judgments you will receive from some members in society.

But I think that principle of understanding differences and preparing for external judgment also applies to large age gap relationships and wide contrast in academic /attainment as well.
You and the person have.to do what feels right for you after all is said and done

I agree. The worst might be, if the couple can't cope up with it and let these external, uncontrollable things affect them. The term "must be ready" shall always apply i guess.

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Mon 07/10/17 10:04 AM
Polyamoury is not for everyone. Society won't accept it but some people are doing it. What's important, in my opinion is that you have to be honest from the beginning. You have to tell your partner from the beginning that it is what you want. The acceptance is or your problem. But when you say how can no woman understands you looks to me that you are asking for a validation. Like i said, this isn't the norm that's why most people disapprove. But there are who thinks the same as you. You just have to be patient enough to look for them. Be true to yourself. Much luck to you. :blush:

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Mon 07/10/17 09:57 AM
That's new to me. Thanks for defining them. Seems an act of cheating to me. Once you do not become honest even to yourself about anything in general, and once your loyalty has been compromised, big or small, it means cheating in my opinion.

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Mon 07/10/17 09:47 AM
This has something to do with your self esteem i guess. I dont thunk a person would pursue someone if he/ she thinks they cant reach that person from the beginning. It would be a bad start. It's a matter of how confident you are on handling a situation or knowing a person or seeking what u really want. I dunno. Just a thought.

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Mon 07/10/17 09:20 AM
Any thoughts or experiences?

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Mon 07/10/17 09:16 AM
This is an open argument. Anyone can respond. I have some friends who are struggling with their own relationships, i guess it's universal whether ur in an inter-racial or with same nationality. I think people when you open a topic they think that it's personal. I've had my fair share of challenges but i get to dea with them. Example, the culture --- i wanna know how it is with some people so as to have an eye opener. Itis by sharing ideas that we learn. We dont necessary have to agree with everything. Just wanna know some thoughts. Everyone's free to comment. :blush:

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Mon 07/10/17 08:39 AM
Thinking or having a relationship with other nationality, what are your challenges? Thoughts?