Community > Posts By > StillWinning

 
StillWinning's photo
Tue 11/27/18 11:28 AM


I totally get it. I noticed too that Crystal is in New Zealand


huh Crystal lives in Zeeland in the Netherlands.

I missed that as well. Nice catch, Dave!

StillWinning's photo
Tue 11/27/18 08:50 AM





There 'are' other people reading this and I just happen to be one of them.

Cut and dried; Having never been gay "I" am a more feminine male. If there is anyone who does understand "how the other gender is wired WITH RESPECT and not from the judgment of a male superiority complex", it is my self.

I fully understand this. I also understand that we live in a time with an active resurgence and "witch hunt" that is out for the male species. Feminism and its constituents are accidentally mixing misandry with feminism. Because of the very argument that you just identified in regard to RESPECT of how women are wired speaks volumes of misandrist feminism.

One has to be very careful on both sides of the fence. Because, when people start identifying with a "lack of"respect" of one's gender and hard-wiring they are inadvertently "victimizing" themselves.

I am too subtle; and was raped at the hands of a woman.

You need to see that it happens on both sides of the fence and that it isn't one-sided.

Women should already know for themselves that they are superior to begin with. Empowerment comes from the roots upward. It does not come from 12 women getting together 25 years after the fact to address a sexual offender. Because THAT is what is creating the Feminist movement that we have today and it is becoming a misandrist movement.


Nice to hear you are reading, sorry to hear you interpret it that way.
I think I am one (of the few) who does see both sides of the fence because I took the time and effort to study it (based on Jungian psychology on men & woman).
I understand you interpret my postings that way, I've also been in a real bad place, I know what abuse is like. For me that was the very reason I developed an interest in this subject material and began perusing it.
flowerforyou




Total respect.
I need it known that my responses are constructive and not of trolling nature. It's just that when I see "blanket" statements coming out of either sex it's shame on YOU, not the establishment.

I too am familiar with Freud and Jung and the "letters" sessions between them. M. Scott Peck MD and John Grey; Master's and Johnson; Dr. Ruth Sharp and a cast of thousands. Read them. Saw them. Utilized what I've learned.

What I've learned is... the women I am up against all think like Crystal. I am in the San Francisco bay area and I am terrified of them all and that, ladies and gentlemen, is why I am on Mingle and not out finding them in person. They're just too Feminist here.


First, I don't see Crystal as being feminist... not by the definition of what a feminist is in America, hahaha!

Anyways, I can relate to what you said Stone, I don't fit into that group either. I'm more of an evolved traditionist if there is such a thing, lol.

I believe women's lib has helped in a lot of ways... but it has also hurt us in so many ways... mostly when it comes to relationships with men and others as well.

I prefer to get in touch with those innate/primal instincts and go from there. smile2

I lived in the Florida Keys when I joined. The lifestyle of most who lived there wasn't my kind of thing, so that's how I ended up in Mingle. drinker


I totally get it. I noticed too that Crystal is in New Zealand and that speaks volumes in itself. The Kiwi men are known just as the Aussie men are for being exactly as she has described. I only know because one of my long time female friends from high school described the men in both locations as "rough" to say the least.

I am enjoying this topic and thread though so I hope my input hasn't driven anybody over any cliffs?!


StillWinning's photo
Tue 11/27/18 08:33 AM



There 'are' other people reading this and I just happen to be one of them.

Cut and dried; Having never been gay "I" am a more feminine male. If there is anyone who does understand "how the other gender is wired WITH RESPECT and not from the judgment of a male superiority complex", it is my self.

I fully understand this. I also understand that we live in a time with an active resurgence and "witch hunt" that is out for the male species. Feminism and its constituents are accidentally mixing misandry with feminism. Because of the very argument that you just identified in regard to RESPECT of how women are wired speaks volumes of misandrist feminism.

One has to be very careful on both sides of the fence. Because, when people start identifying with a "lack of"respect" of one's gender and hard-wiring they are inadvertently "victimizing" themselves.

I am too subtle; and was raped at the hands of a woman.

You need to see that it happens on both sides of the fence and that it isn't one-sided.

Women should already know for themselves that they are superior to begin with. Empowerment comes from the roots upward. It does not come from 12 women getting together 25 years after the fact to address a sexual offender. Because THAT is what is creating the Feminist movement that we have today and it is becoming a misandrist movement.


Nice to hear you are reading, sorry to hear you interpret it that way.
I think I am one (of the few) who does see both sides of the fence because I took the time and effort to study it (based on Jungian psychology on men & woman).
I understand you interpret my postings that way, I've also been in a real bad place, I know what abuse is like. For me that was the very reason I developed an interest in this subject material and began perusing it.
flowerforyou


Total respect.
I need it known that my responses are constructive and not of trolling nature. It's just that when I see "blanket" statements coming out of either sex it's shame on YOU, not the establishment.

I too am familiar with Freud and Jung and the "letters" sessions between them. M. Scott Peck MD and John Grey; Master's and Johnson; Dr. Ruth Sharp and a cast of thousands. Read them. Saw them. Utilized what I've learned.

What I've learned is... the women I am up against all think like Crystal. I am in the San Francisco bay area and I am terrified of them all and that, ladies and gentlemen, is why I am on Mingle and not out finding them in person. They're just too Feminist here.

StillWinning's photo
Tue 11/27/18 08:02 AM
Waiting for your input Crystal...

StillWinning's photo
Tue 11/27/18 07:56 AM

Most men much like women have a fragile ego and this fear of rejection. I would rather be rejected from the start then 20 some years later. If a man or woman is empowered, he or she will not let that hold them back.
Only a few men are empowered enough to approach a woman without having gotten a sign from her that she's into him. Same is true for the few woman who are empowered enough to approach a man without some sign from him that he is into her. To me this needs to change.

The way I see it, if a man has a place to live, then the woman needs to go out there and check it out. Kick the tires so to speak. Then if the woman is still into him, kick his tires.

If a woman has a place to live, then the man needs to go out there and check it out. Kick the tires so to speak. Then if the man is still interested in the woman, kick her tires.

The idea we can get to know each other on the internet is bull-shid to me. It is just an internet construct. Words have a funny way of meaning different things to different people.

What really pisses me off is when after spending hours and hours communicating with what I think is a woman is really a man, getting your information and attempting to get some money from you.


Chris, I feel it. You're in the belly of the beast. I'm not here to disrupt anything nor am I in anyway bad-mouthing this site but 97% of the profiles that can be found via the search engine are fake profiles with per diem quotas to make "x" amount of profiles and to acquire "x" amount of phone numbers and "x" amount of email addresses everyday and this site is a haven for them.

The real people are here in the community link and forum. The rest are getting paid.

StillWinning's photo
Tue 11/27/18 07:51 AM


River, you're absolutely right. Thank you for your input! As you've stated there is also a way to completely "miss" said opportunities!

Estes Park? Brrrrrrrrrr!


You're welcome! I'm here until the end of May... I found a great way to travel through seasonal work that includes housing happy

And yes... Brrrrrr, lol. For the most part it's a dryer cold so isn't as bothersome as some places, but it's a very windy area so that makes it feel a lot colder.

You know, it's so funny that you say that! I live at 50 feet above sea-level and am close to the ocean. I have "moist" cold whereas where you and my Mother are is a "dry" cold and here's the difference:

Put a bottle of champagne in a bucket of ice
Put a bottle of champagne in a bottle of ice water...

See which one chills faster!

StillWinning's photo
Tue 11/27/18 07:45 AM
For the record; "This man" gets it.

StillWinning's photo
Tue 11/27/18 07:43 AM


....
Now that's what I'm thinking... more subtle than the cowgirl with the lasso, hahaha.

Throwing the hankie would be similar to using a lasso, too direct.

Men are saying we're too subtle? Maybe as they get older, they grow tired of looking for subtleties and want a more direct approach?

Women can be too subtle, but you'd need context to say whether it requires looking at or not.
Thing is, us women can read between the lines. We pick up on vibes as we are such intuitive beings (=feminine quality, when empowered this is our strength!)
So in communication with other women we are what men call subtle. We don't have to be direct, blunt or anything, the other knows exactly what we mean.
ALSO when it's not nice btw. Jealousy for instance. A woman can sense that a mile away, even in her best friend.
So the way we communicate basically hinges on the concept of our intuition, that the other will know what you mean.

In contact with a man this can be a problem because he will not get it. Men are not subtle, they're direct. Not by choice, but because of how they're wired.
That's why your partner won't get it when you give hint after hint. Another woman would've gotten it right away, most men won't.
Can lead to huge rows:
Woman: "I've told you a thousand times to XYZ!!! You never listen to me!!"
Man: WTF are you talking about? You NEVER told me?!

BOTH are right... in their own way, hihi.
And BOTH will have to learn this and accommodate the other as it's a difference in man & woman, how we're wired differently.
So we will have to remember and be more direct, man will have to pay closer attention.
Sounds tiring, but I think it goes by itself when a couple truly loves each other as then they care enough to want to understand one another. They'll also spend more quality time together and so on.
I think that unfortunately in most cases people get in a rut and kind of lose track of what the other is like, begin judging them as opposed to wanting to understand them and so on.

So women too subtle, possibly, depends on context. And it's not too subtle really, only in a man's perception, not in woman's perception as women get it perfectly.
UNDERSTANDING this concept could make a HUGE difference to people's love lives.
Now we're still at the point that everyone is judging the other as opposed to thinking about "Why would that be?"
And oddly enough it all goes right back to self-esteem problems: Men not daring to chase, women not daring to open up and be vulnerable (AND not being used to this anymore as our society is masculine).

It IS a huge problem, but only as long as people don't understand these things. You cannot change it, thousands of years of primal instinct aren't gonna go anywhere. It's part of our make-up. If it'd change, we wouldn't be human beings anymore but a different species.
Meaning we'll have to learn to deal with it in a healthy way, the way it was meant to be, like we did a long long time ago, before men became the dominant gender.
All it takes to solve -and for people to have their chances at a happy love life sky-rocket-, is the willingness to work on personal issues AND understanding how the other gender is wired WITH RESPECT, not from judgement and a male-superiority complex, which unfortunately is still very much alive.

I'll leave it at that, don't think anyone is reading this anymore, except for you, haha.

flowerforyou
..
..
..


There 'are' other people reading this and I just happen to be one of them.

Cut and dried; Having never been gay "I" am a more feminine male. If there is anyone who does understand "how the other gender is wired WITH RESPECT and not from the judgment of a male superiority complex", it is my self.

I fully understand this. I also understand that we live in a time with an active resurgence and "witch hunt" that is out for the male species. Feminism and its constituents are accidentally mixing misandry with feminism. Because of the very argument that you just identified in regard to RESPECT of how women are wired speaks volumes of misandrist feminism.

One has to be very careful on both sides of the fence. Because, when people start identifying with a "lack of"respect" of one's gender and hard-wiring they are inadvertently "victimizing" themselves.

I am too subtle; and was raped at the hands of a woman.

You need to see that it happens on both sides of the fence and that it isn't one-sided.

Women should already know for themselves that they are superior to begin with. Empowerment comes from the roots upward. It does not come from 12 women getting together 25 years after the fact to address a sexual offender. Because THAT is what is creating the Feminist movement that we have today and it is becoming a misandrist movement.




StillWinning's photo
Tue 11/27/18 07:11 AM
River, you're absolutely right. Thank you for your input! As you've stated there is also a way to completely "miss" said opportunities!

Estes Park? Brrrrrrrrrr!

StillWinning's photo
Tue 11/27/18 06:59 AM
Why, thankyou Poetry. I appreciate the welcome!

I've written some things amidst the threads and answered a few posts. I like that I have found the "community" link because this seems to be the only place where there are actual people. The "search" mechanism is an excellent source of "fake profiles" and solicitors so in the least the community is where it's at.

Looking forward to spending all of my time in the community since the other 97% on the website are freelance per-diem profile makers.

Stone

StillWinning's photo
Tue 11/27/18 06:21 AM
Edited by StillWinning on Tue 11/27/18 06:22 AM
Wull since the two people above me are dominating this ride, YES! I am staying and I will join you both for coffee... then you can go do your thing and I will get back to the search. How about that!

EDIT:

MODERATOR: Can somebody delete this second one? I posted twice by accident. Thanks.

StillWinning's photo
Tue 11/27/18 06:21 AM
Wull since the two people above me are dominating this ride, YES! I am staying and I will join you both for coffee... then you can go do your thing and I will get back to the search. How about that!

StillWinning's photo
Tue 11/27/18 06:17 AM
Excellent thread and an excellent read. Thank you everyone for your input!

My own two cents: It is entirely circumstantial. There is a time and a place for everything. Dually, there are times when being chased just isn't kosher.

I am actually one of those rare cases who's been raped at the hands of a woman. Without going too deeply into it but for point sake, I was managing a tanning salon and I had a client that was showing a solid interest. Given the nature of my job it is a conflict of interest to date or solicit patrons thus I was professional as I always am.

Thing is, she was indeed "chasing me" and was for lack of better words, "throwing herself at me"... if this was the OP's original inquiry?

Of course it was flattering but she started showing up after hours to intercept me as I was leaving at the end of each work day. It was both intriguing AND a drain on my energy at the same time. Needless to say on one evening I obliged and followed her to her house.

*I amn't making this rape story out of an inquiry but the point is; That, she was stronger than I was(because, let's face it, she was on a women's hockey team), and I was indeed being pursued and she indeed got what she wanted whether I was enjoying it or not.

The back side is, I have also been pursued under the right circumstances and it can make for an amazing rendezvous and a relationship of spice and romance! It can be ecstasy when pursued by the right person under the right circumstances. People can and do meet some of the richest experiences in their lives under conditions of spontaneity.




StillWinning's photo
Mon 11/26/18 08:31 AM
Having never married I've dated and found myself in attractions with multiple years difference. Every situation is unique. You can't put an age on attraction but you can put an age on common decency.

If you're male the tide is already against you on all levels dating anything more than a four year spread and here's the psychology behind this: When you were in high school you were exposed to four different age groups. It isn't uncommon to see high school seniors dating freshmen and vice versa. So rule of thumb would be to avoid anything more than a high school age spread in years.

*There are always exceptions to the rule!

My last lover was 12 years older and we had fabulous chemistry. I have also dated a 22 when I was 30 years old and we were genuinely in-love. We had known each other for years and had a foundation between us and that's why it worked.

But, because this IS the internet: And, because this is a haven for stalkers and sick people with ulterior motives I would say that your best bet is to keep your interactions with those of like age in general.

The key words above being that in the above relationship we had a relationship with an age difference but we "had known each other for years", which, is very likely NOT going to be the case with online dating platforms.

Keep it clean.