GIRL'S THAT DON'T PUT OUT

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE:

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me.

I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!'

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...

'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.

We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck.


I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.

Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier.

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel like it.

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, 'WHAT?'

I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, 'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?'

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that b*tch knows I'm smarter than her.

OK.. So we "can't find illegal imigrants" and yet in this article I saw on msn.. They are interviewed.. Does the news just say hey are you illegal? Can we interview you? Because if that's the case.. Couldn't the government walk up ask if they were illegal and deport them?? Now don't get me wrong. I have no problem, if people come here legally. But, if they are here illegally they are breaking the law and we are just allowing it.. Why? Here's the article if your interested


http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26513677

I agree

Gets as far away from the train as humanly possibly lmao

Cause the beauty of this state lies with the U.P. Eh?

LMFAO nice. just gotta edit it so it doesnt repeat itself. Unless its supposed to and it doesnt make sense lol

Yeah.. This chick reminds me of someone I met on here for coffee... YEAH... Glad she doesnt know where I live cause this would've been a story in Wyoming, MI lol.. She was WAY off her rocker.. Could rival this one.

That's too bad mirror.. Don't park your car in random garages? You never know whats gonna happen to you or your car haha. Yeah.. This chick reminds me of someone I met on here for coffee... YEAH... Glad she doesnt know where I live cause this would've been a story in Wyoming, MI lol.. She was WAY off her rocker.. Could rival this one.

On mingle2 haha

HAHA I mean DAM! That is like effin crazy times 10 hahhaahha

Not sure if this is general discussion. But, yeah read this article I saw on msn about crazy people met on dating sites lol.. Thought I'd share..


http://tech.msn.com/news/articlecnet.aspx?cp-documentid=9805544&GT1=40000


This has to be the weirdest and saddest crime-of-virtual-passion story I've come across.

Kimberly Jernigan -- a 33-year-old woman from North Carolina -- was apparently distraught after her online relationship with a 52-year-old man from Claymont, Del., came to an end.

The pair apparently met through the online community Second Life and began a virtual relationship. The two finally met in reality several months ago, and the alleged victim ended the relationship, sending Jernigan into a downward spiral.

In early August, Jernigan allegedly drove to the victim's Pennsylvania workplace and attempted to kidnap him at gunpoint, according to local news station CBS3.com. When she was unsuccessful, according to the report, she returned two weeks later to track down the victim's Delaware address, and posed as a postal worker to do so. After four days of searching, authorities said she found the man's residence in the Whitney Presidential Towers on the 7100 block of Society Drive in Claymont.


On August 21, police said, Jernigan broke into the unnamed victim's apartment with a Taser, a pair of handcuffs, a BB gun, her dog, and a roll of duct tape. He wasn't there, so she waited. When the virtual ex arrived home he saw what looked like a laser beam projecting on his chest. He immediately fled the apartment and contacted the Newcastle County Police.

Police said that when they arrived, they found Jernigan's dog, Gogi, bound with duct tape in the victim's bathtub. Jernigan's reason for gagging her pooch -- "he was making too much noise." The dog was said to be uninjured, but the ASPCA is looking into possible charges of animal cruelty.

Approximately an hour after the incident, authorities in Maryland spotted Jernigan's vehicle at a rest stop on I-95. She was taken into custody after a brief struggle. Jernigan is currently facing charges of attempted kidnapping, burglary, and aggravated menacing, CBS3 said.

What's the lesson here, kiddies? Keep your virtual relationships virtual and don't bring it into the real world or some innocent animal may be harmed in the process ...

oh god.. I have to teach 72 women how to have sex? Damn... Couldn't I have 72 whores instead? And, no one ever said they were women.. Until now.. The only way I'd willingly die.. Is if I knew they were women haha

Thankfully its only the IE.. Otherwise I'd of sold it back to HP as soon as I got it. It's just irritating to have vista tell me when there is something wrong with a perfectly good site and causes IE to shut down and restart. If I so much as click the x to fast *if I have 2 tabs open* or even one if I try to go to a differant site it freezes tells me there is something wrong with it and restarts

Hmm I dunno what I did when I got this computer *probably tried to make it more like XP* but now that I did that reset.. My IE is flying in between pages lol

Pretty much.. I'd love to. But heard that it was dam near impossible, and that it was basically useless because they are going to stop making patches and what not for XP

LOL eh I was thinkin worse like the dude from.. Fall out boy? HAHAHA. Sex pistols aren't bad I don't think idk. I dont listen to punk.. I just know that either way.. Johnny Rotten, or Johnny Cash.. LOL if saint anger wasn't mainstream... Well u can call me the man in black haha

Ok.. So I grew up using windows. I've been using windows since.. Hell pre 95.. And, I buy this laptop a few months back.. Of course it has vista.. So, I'm used to the "real" windows.. The one if there is a problem you have to manually fix it. Hey if the OS isn't broken don't fix it bill. Anyways, I was wondering if there is a way to over ride the automatically restart Internet Explorer when ever there is "a problem." If anyone knows how to get rid of this STUPID feature.. PLEASE let me know. I can't take it anymore

Also pi$$ed me off when they killed napster.. And, free music as we knew it.. Damn man.. Does anyone really need a gold toilet? A 50 million dollar house 30 lambos and 15 vactation homes.. C'mon people

LMFAO no worries man. I know the feeling. They need to just fess up.. If saint anger wasnt mainstream.. Then my name is... Wtf is that guys name from that really punk band? Ah hell you get the point.