Topic: Is this wrong?
ShagnaC's photo
Sun 03/11/07 06:07 PM
OK I met a couple of men online and I have been dating one for about 2
months now, He was kind of boring for me but I wanted to see if he would
grow on me. He was very nice and always put my feelings into
consideration. He wasnt the typical player as a lot of the bad boys I
have dated.
Anyway I wanted to see how much he was really a nice guy or not so I set
a ploy up and emailed him as a single women to see if he would respond.
He did. My friend said I was trying to find a excuse to sabatoge the
start of a relatinship as I wasnt really into it anyway.
Do you think it is wrong for women to set up ploys to see if the man is
honest or not?
LOOSER!!!!!!!!!!!!
I will nock his **** in the dirt in a few days but right now I still
want to play a little hahah! Shame on me

jeanc200358's photo
Sun 03/11/07 06:11 PM
If some other man had emailed you, would you have responded?

Yes, I do think it's wrong to set people up, for any reason.

However, having said that, I can understand why you did it.

BillRoot's photo
Sun 03/11/07 06:14 PM
Think if you feel something wrong with the relationship, investigate.

hosea1's photo
Sun 03/11/07 06:15 PM
yes, it defintely wrogn to set up someone you are dating, that just
shows a sign of distrust. and if there inst trust then you shouldnt be
with him

LadyOfMagic's photo
Sun 03/11/07 06:16 PM
No..I don't think its wrong at all..I think people need to know what
they are getting themselves into before they are fully in it..that way
you can stop it before it goes too far and you get hurt emotionally
and/or jailed for hurting him physically..lol

ShagnaC's photo
Sun 03/11/07 06:22 PM
Trust takes time to build and it has only been a month, that is the time
to get to know someone and build that foundation. I didnt think it was
going to go anywhere as I was pretty bored all the time, but again like
I said I wanted to give it a try. I am glad I did the ploy now I will
not waste anymore time on a LOOSER!!

TxsGal3333's photo
Sun 03/11/07 06:23 PM
Well ya know it all depends on what you said and what his response is
also you said your not really into him. Humm do you not think that maybe
he can sense that and figure what would the harm be to talk to someone
else also just as you are you said you have met a couple of guys so why
is it wrong for him to be doing the same thing you are doing keeping the
options open. What is good for one is good for the other.bigsmile

ShagnaC's photo
Sun 03/11/07 06:25 PM
NO I didnt meet anyone since I started dating him, We talked about
keeping it one on one to build the relationship.
I sent a email saying I saw his profile and wanted to know if he was
seeing anyone. He said NO he was not seeing anyone and was single.

unsure's photo
Sun 03/11/07 06:26 PM
I do think its wrong that you made up a fake lady but sometimes women
feel the need to be a little sneaky! I myself think its better just to
leave the relationship if you are feeling the need to go that far!
My question to you is, how would you feel if he did that to you? Did you
tell him what you did or will you tell him? You think that hes not being
honest with you by replying to this "other lady" but then again, you are
really not being honest by creating this "other lady"
I think when you start playing games like that, sooner or later you are
the one who will end up getting hurt~~so be careful!!

ShagnaC's photo
Sun 03/11/07 06:32 PM
Good point unsure. But how do you gain trust with someone you dont know
very well?
Dont we all try and find things out about a person to see if they are
the one we want to be with. I know we all question things about the men
we have been with, maybe some of us have not been sneaky. Yes I know it
probally was not a nice thing to do but what if I would of stayed fell
in love and he was a asshole all along?

julieluv's photo
Sun 03/11/07 06:34 PM
Games wow I was falsely accused of playing games like this from someone
that I trusted once. He just was very far from the truth. I just happen
to be really busy and was not playing games at all. I honestly felt we
could have hit that relationship out of the park if he had just trusted
me. I feel we should be honest with each other and just come right out
and ask about what we want to know. Games set ups things of that sort
are we not to old for such things?

TxsGal3333's photo
Sun 03/11/07 06:36 PM
Ohh misunderstood the post thought you meant you were seeing a couple at
the same time or talking to another while with this one. But maybe he
felt like the relantionship was not going anywhere either. But ..... I
do understand I actaully go online with one once that I was seeing just
talking under a differnt name all was kewl till he started talking about
my size out of the clear blue and I had not asked questions of the sort
he just felt free to dish me and did not know he was talking to me
hummmmmmmmm needless to say that is no more but I never told him about
that just told him that he and I had differnt things we were looking for
in life and parted as friends. bigsmile

unsure's photo
Sun 03/11/07 06:36 PM
Thats the bad thing about this internet stuff~~who can we really trust??
Honestly, you don't know if he is going to be an a**hole, but do we know
that about anyone we date?
I would say that you had trust issues with this man all along or you
would have never done that? I would say its time to move on and find a
guy that you have fun with...life is way to short to spend it on someone
that you don't trust!!
Happy hunting flowerforyou

no photo
Sun 03/11/07 06:41 PM
life is short play hard he should have told the truth and say he met
someone but its in the early stages keep her info so if it did not work
out with you he would contact her

Morena350's photo
Sun 03/11/07 09:45 PM
Shagna, if you liked him and wanted a serious relationship with him
you wouldn't have done it, because when we really want to have something
with a person that your really interested in, you don't wanna
know,,,,the heart doesn't want to see or hear nothing that will hurt
that relationship, unless your already together and you know he is doing
something wrong then we do investigate, and sometimes we make believe
all is well, feelings can play a trick on us, and we have to be aware
of what is it that we are feeling
your friend was right. You want to find something wrong with him and I
really think that is why you did it girly!!

ShagnaC's photo
Sun 03/11/07 09:49 PM
Well I found it but I am ok with it, Time to move on. I am happy being
single or with someone. BOB is always there in the time of need
hahahah!!
Thank you M