I agree they cant miss what theynever had, but they will always wonder. my son was 4 when his dad left and he remembers so he feels abandoned and is sensitive for it while my daughter never knew her dad and she isnt as emotional about it but has alot of un aswered questions. I never knew my dad either so I understand but your rite, there is a reason for everything and I am very proud of how well my children have turned out so far! my son is 12 and daughter is 16 and both on honer roll and well behaved! I got lucky I guess

some times they just don't get it how much "there" kids need them my dad walked away when i was 4 and i wished for the first 3 years of my daughters life her dad would walk away then i took a 6 hour class called "for the sake of the children" and it some how made me see how i felt about my dad and mom and all the stuff i went through with them not getting along and every thing i don't want my child 20 years form now to fell like shes the rope for a game of tug a war and shes being pulled back and forth. it has been 20 years for my parents devoice and i still at 24 years old feel like a rope and moms on one are and dad on the other i swear if the pull any harder i am going to snap.

TRUE! it's too bad though that poeple "moms or dads" can put them selfs before the needs of there own children! I think it's even harder on your kids that the mom is in and out of there life and not consistant :( it is so confusing for them

glad you 2 can make it work! it's all about whats best for the kids! I have never bad mouth my kids dad to them all I have said was that sometimes adults dont make the rite choices and that I love them and love to spend time with them. I dont want them to think they arnt worth being loved or that they did anytnhing to deserve being abandond

You know you can ship him here anytime..just be sure to ship yourself here as well

my daughters dad and i are getting along better now than before just wish my sons father and i could do the same thing but its only been 4 months sence we split up so am sure in time things well be okay and we well agree on so visits for him its a little hared to let my son go to his dad were hes a baby (well 17month old but still my baby) and his dad is 3 hours away from me.

with me just like everyday.....thank god couldnt imagine xmas without them.

Luckily my ex is Mexican, so they celebrate on Christmas Eve while I celebrate Christmas Day. Everybody wins.

Christmas is at the Ex's house, that is where my children have spent the majority of their time. I didn't want to do the here for this, there for that, same with Thanksgiving, Easter....
This year is a bit different since the oldest lives with me. We will go the the Ex's house for Christmas day, and for dinner.
But Christmas Eve they both will be with me for a while, the youngest will spend the night in her own home, in her own bed.
We live close by, its not like anyone has to travel more than 10 miles.
When they both are on their own, they can make their own decisions where they want to spend the Holidays.

I never knew my dad, he split when he found out my mom was pregnant and she never saw or heard from him again. I spent every year with my mom for christmas.

Please don't feel sorry for me since I never knew him I don't know what I missed. I feel no regret or remorse for not missing a man i never knew.

I am very happy with my life, my mom did her best to raise me on her own and I turned out pretty well.

Getting through the holidays as a single parent is much like getting through the holidays when the kids fly the coop to move on with their adult lives. It is really all about planning and being flexible.

Tradition is fun but trying new ideas and includeing new people in celebrateing can make holidays a lot of fun. Remembering Christmas is a season and not just a day gives perspective.

When my kids were small and I was solo I planned things with other single parents and traded off some of the "gender" specific stuff.

Kids are off with the other side then plan a little luxery time with great munchies, self improvement, or posh recreation. It is not required to be home alone you can have a mini vacation at a hotel, spa, or staying with friends or relatives of your own having a best buddies moment.

Volunteering to be with those who do not have loved ones can make your empty moments feel very full.

wish this was so for me it did not feel like christmas to me to day i missed my little girl so much today cant wait till tomorrow when she comes home so she can open her gifts and we can spend some time together

ITs important for kids to have both parents in their life wherever possible. My oldest lives with me in las vegas and visits with his dad in the summer in columbus. My youngest,,her dad is a non resident alien that immigration wont let in the country(visa denied), so Im not sure she will ever get the chance to know him other thant through letters and phone calls.