Topic: is sex really necessary in a relationship?
Dodo_David's photo
Tue 04/09/13 08:55 PM

I kind of think implying that a relationship without sex was therefore only a 'friendship' is kind of minimizing those relationships between people who choose to not have sex but do have an intimate romantic relationship

the point is that SEX is not the only type of intimacy,, and intimacy is the line between friendship and relationship,, not SEX....


:thumbsup:

FearandLoathing's photo
Tue 04/09/13 09:12 PM


DD, if a case could be made for F&L to have been belittling ANYONE in his post, it would be women. I'm a woman, and I don't see it as belittling.


Let me use an analogy. Is it possible for a person to run one mile in less than 4 minutes?

Answer: Yes.

It is true that very few people are capable of running a mile in less than 4 minutes, but the inability of most people to run that fast doesn't mean that it's impossible for anyone to run that fast.

Now, suppose that you personally were able to run a mile in less than 4 minutes. How would you respond if another person were to tell you to stop running that fast because the other person can't run that fast? Would it be proper for the other person to tell you to slow down even though the two of you aren't running together?

No, it would not be proper for the other person to tell you to slow down. If you enjoy running a mile in less than 4 minutes, then what gives anyone the right to tell you not to do that?

Likewise, if a single woman says that she wants a romance, but that she doesn't want sexual intercourse, then what gives a man the right to tell the woman to stop advertising for a romance because she doesn't want sexual intercourse?

Like it or not, it is possible for two single adults to have a romance that doesn't include sexual intercourse (just as it is possible for a person to run a mile in less than 4 minutes).

If two single adults do have such romance, then it is an error to claim that their romance isn't a romance but a friendship instead.

If a romance for you personally requires sexual intercourse, then so be it, and I wish you well.

If a romance for you personally doesn't require sexual intercourse, then so be it, and I wish you well.

Meanwhile, I see no sense in criticizing a person for acknowledging or defending the existence of both kinds of romance.









I didn't criticize.

Learn to read.

no photo
Tue 04/09/13 09:43 PM
Holy smokes, is there someone out there actually asking this question?

no photo
Tue 04/09/13 09:44 PM
It can be fun when you're not in love too lol.

no photo
Tue 04/09/13 09:45 PM

Sex when you are in love with someone is AMAZING!

So, yes...sex is important.

It can be fun when you're not in love too lol.

BiRomance's photo
Tue 04/09/13 10:57 PM
On Topic.

Platonic Love still can exist.

However, I like to consider Sex as a celebration of a couples Love.

Yes, Sex without Love exists too, all too frequent in our day and age.

Yet, it is never as good as when it is shared by two hearts in love with one another. <3

TawtStrat's photo
Wed 04/10/13 09:58 AM


DD, if a case could be made for F&L to have been belittling ANYONE in his post, it would be women. I'm a woman, and I don't see it as belittling.


Let me use an analogy. Is it possible for a person to run one mile in less than 4 minutes?

Answer: Yes.

It is true that very few people are capable of running a mile in less than 4 minutes, but the inability of most people to run that fast doesn't mean that it's impossible for anyone to run that fast.

Now, suppose that you personally were able to run a mile in less than 4 minutes. How would you respond if another person were to tell you to stop running that fast because the other person can't run that fast? Would it be proper for the other person to tell you to slow down even though the two of you aren't running together?

No, it would not be proper for the other person to tell you to slow down. If you enjoy running a mile in less than 4 minutes, then what gives anyone the right to tell you not to do that?

Likewise, if a single woman says that she wants a romance, but that she doesn't want sexual intercourse, then what gives a man the right to tell the woman to stop advertising for a romance because she doesn't want sexual intercourse?

Like it or not, it is possible for two single adults to have a romance that doesn't include sexual intercourse (just as it is possible for a person to run a mile in less than 4 minutes).

If two single adults do have such romance, then it is an error to claim that their romance isn't a romance but a friendship instead.

If a romance for you personally requires sexual intercourse, then so be it, and I wish you well.

If a romance for you personally doesn't require sexual intercourse, then so be it, and I wish you well.

Meanwhile, I see no sense in criticizing a person for acknowledging or defending the existence of both kinds of romance.

The intimacy and even sexual intercourse often doesn't make it qualify as a relationship for some people. You saying that just holding hands and being really friendly counts as a relationship is not that different from someone telling me that we are just friends even though we are having sex and going out together and all of that other stuff.

Can a pair of schoolkids that are going out together be said to be in a "relationship" or are they just a pair of kids that are going out with each other? Well, some would say yes and some would say no because they are just kids or because they aren't sleeping together. Do you think then that it's patronising to say that two adults doing the same thing aren't really in a proper relationship either? Is that your problem with this? At the end of the day, if you want to call that a relationship that's up to you but you can't stop other people from having an opinion about it.





RainbowTrout's photo
Thu 04/11/13 03:20 PM
I don't think it is really necessary. It may be desirable.

no photo
Thu 04/11/13 03:46 PM
Edited by KiK2me on Thu 04/11/13 03:53 PM
Isn't the root of love between couples ATTRACTION ?
Sex and desire should be the ultimate sharing of that love to me
It makes that love a special part of togetherness
And the fact that we humans are intellectual beings
Is the only reason we even make this choice...
In fact i think LOVE is the unnecessary part of a relationship
Of these two....If i had to pick one
Look at all the others of our brethren here on earth
"Animals" for the most part simply MATE for instinctive procreation
The DEEP instinctive need to survive for the sake of our species !
Given there ARE a few who mate for life...
But this thing called "LOVE" is a complexity we humans throw into life's equation in courtship and mating...
Thank you
JMHO
flowerforyou

So "no sex"
=no relationship
for MOST !
:wink:


"SEX is EVIL
SEX is SIN
SINS are FORGIVEN
So SEX is IN" !

-unknown Author-

ronny1968's photo
Thu 04/11/13 08:20 PM
Your a 22 year old female so i think your question really is how do i get what i want out of a relationship without having sex! The answer is "you can not!" unless your open and honest! seek friends and other relationships to fullfill your needs. just dont pretend to be something your not or unhappiness will follow.

no photo
Fri 04/12/13 12:01 AM
love

salilkaran's photo
Sun 04/14/13 04:39 PM
Do u think sex is the key insterest in a relationship ?

no photo
Sun 04/14/13 04:49 PM
Absolutely!

vanvica's photo
Mon 04/15/13 06:24 AM

Yes, sex is REALLY necessary in a romantic, monogamous relationship.
Sex can be shared in various forms.
But sex does help to open up ways to communicate effectively with your partner and I believe that most of us understand how important that is to the survival of a relationship
i believe you.

msharmony's photo
Mon 04/15/13 06:32 AM
sex is in the mind, intercourse is just one way the body manifests it,,,


Im going to start a movement to legalize same person marriage, for those whoc choose to commit to themself and receive the same tax breaks as same sex and opposite sex marriages,,,,





no photo
Mon 04/15/13 06:37 AM
Its a mans obligation to stick his boneration in a womens separation; this sort of penetration will increase the population of the younger generation. :banana:

TawtStrat's photo
Mon 04/15/13 07:45 AM

sex is in the mind, intercourse is just one way the body manifests it,,,


Yeah and food is in the mind and eating is just one way that the body manifests it. It's also fine for people to starve themselves and to deny food to the people that they claim to care about.

But you say that this is a bad analogy because you need to eat to survive and it is possible to go without sex, even though you might want it. Saying that you do want it but that you choose to abstain means that you are trying to deny your own nature. It isn't really plausible to take a stand like that without implying something about people that do have sex, whatever you might say about not judging. Saying that only "He" has the right to judge is a piece of disingenuous sophistry.

gyanu4u's photo
Mon 04/15/13 02:07 PM
depends upon the interest and trust between couples....it is the magical love making style who binds both in relationship stronglydrinks drinks :heart: :heart: waving

gyanu4u's photo
Mon 04/15/13 02:10 PM
depends upon the interest and trust between couples....it is the magical love making style who binds both in relationship stronglydrinks drinks :heart: :heart: waving

no photo
Mon 04/15/13 07:15 PM
Well, whether it is necessary or not, I notice it sure seems that for many it is the only thing.

Sex is just one small part of a (hopefully) progressive relationship, yet for some it just seems to be the only reason to bother being in one.

Very backwards.