Years ago I was told in the dating world you want to be sure you use the right bait to get the catch you want.

Do you think that is true of internet dating or do you just throw yourself in the lake and hope to get enough bites before you get water logged and drown?

What would be the best bait for you to use or see? Would it change over time?

At the risk of being an anachronism i suggest an honest narrative with specific interests and minimal requirements coupled with at least six photos which present an accurate visual representation so as to be accurate and fair as all too often women are deceptive with head shots alone and euphemisms such as "a little extra" "curvy" and the most vague " average" where great deception is easily found. Furthermore the longer one invests before actually meeting in a public place the greater the chance for emotions to create a connection based on needs and lonliness and not on honest connection. The sooner one is able to have a short quick and meet the better the chance for emotions to be held and an accurate meet can occur otherwise the level of expectation is greater and the initial meeting can be quite traumatic as the expectations many have run rampant causing greater disappointment than had a quicker meeting been arranged...

I can remember when I first came to the internet I posted all kinds of pictures, glamorized, fishing, all seasons, right down to a bikini pic that one came off quickly ...I had this long report on who I was and what I was looking for. I must have had 100 interests on my profile. Horrible Bait

So through the years my profile which I consider free advertising of me.. Has changed, describing who and what I am.. I look at my profile as a taste to see if the" bait" I am using will pull someone in that actually wants to know more and if we can converse.


When I came back to Mingle after being gone doing my thing..I put up the profile I have now and meant it. I wasn't looking, I was so content in my own life that I honestly didn't think I would make the effort. Pancho and I started over my sending an email telling him, I loved his style in that thread. Never expected to hear from him again,6 months later we are closer and stronger than ever..And the funny thing is neither one of us did any baiting. Neither was really looking for anything.


Does the bait change over time hopefully since we change..

I'm sure there's a good joke to be told regarding using a big enough worm but I aint gonna tell it.....nope nope nope

Heyyyy I said I wouldnt tell it!


And sorry, Ms PacificStar, for going off topic

I'm sure it's true. It's like going for a job interview, u only speak of what is relevant to that particular job. I personally use various baits. But my tagline works just the way i wanted it too.

Well all I can say is this, despite a rather descriptive profile of what I am looking for, that no one reads, I am going to stick with just a photo of leaves or something to weed out all the wrong fish.

Justme, they will still want to roll around in your leaves.



Lately, I'm not putting anything on my hook. For heaven's sake, I say I have cancer and colostomy and it does not seem to register with them. I don't even think I would date me. I know, I got issues. Where's my psychiatrist?

for me.

Ure so tall dear

The truth. What you see is what you get. If I have to" make the sale so to speak" where will that get me? I want someone who wants me for who I am. so I try to be as honest as possible...Side note@ to tulip I don't think you need a psychiatrist, your posts are always funny and upbeat and I hope your feeling good today.

and of course this rules out the right one as your focus is on the negative ones making them important rather than ignoring them and giving men a genuine visual representation...

Thanks, Jack. I'm starting to feel better and laughing a bit.

Somewhat, but not really.

As a general description it's true of internet dating.
In order to find someone attracted to you, you need to be someone they are attracted to. That's the general equivalent.

When you start making it subjective and anecdotal it's where it loses it's truth. People seem to believe they can control themselves as the bait. They can't. From the perspective of others, you are who you are.

The more subjective you internalize the saying it becomes apropos to use the other fishing analogy regarding the need to cast your line 1,000 times before you get a nibble.
Also, if you want to catch a fish, go where the fish are.

Too many people neglect those.
They focus on the bait, and when it's not immediately successful they, on some level, think there is either something wrong with the fish, or with themselves, the bait, and pretend that changing their profile actually changes the bait.


Yes and no?
I've thrown myself in the lake.
But I've never worried about "enough bites" or becoming "water logged" or drowning.


Something that from my perspective denotes I would be attracted to them and desire to have a conversation with them?


Sure.
Year to year, month to month, week to week, day to day, mood to mood, interest to interest.

Did you read my profile? Please let me know (in a pm) what is negative other than stating I will not participate in a LDR. Because from what you infer, having that on my profile will bring in everyone but someone local.

Did I get that correct?

Interesting posts.

I am finding the things I would have considered "bait" years ago sure are different than what would attract me now.

Once upon a time a co-parent was very important but now my sons are grown and independent for years I don't really see someone who would be a co-parent as terribly important.

Once upon the time I would have entertained gallivanting to Timbucktu and now I am more selective to where I even want to vacation.

I built the dream house, sprawling yard, and had all the stuff now I would like comfortable digs but more and more the patio garden where I don't dig weeds sounds good. If I was a golf cart community more the better since I would rather have a root cannel than deal with the DMV or figure out why all the gizmo's on a car have to be in tune.

Upon reading all the comments, i think i believe u all think of "bait" as a bad thing, a dirty word. Who says putting a bait isn't being urself? And u don't sell urself? At all? I sell myself, my personality everyday. It is the nature of my career. I'd get no where without selling myself

I don't know what other people consider the word bait as but then I was NOT suggesting a "Bait and switch" but as a fishing metaphor where bait has a lot to do with what kind of fish you will be able to catch. Good bait will help but then the person still has to have some other skills.

I think the terminology for me anyway comes from sites like plenty of fish. I know when I started over there it was called fishing well if you are fishing you better bait the hook.

I believe in all honesty the bait better be good or there is gonna be some stink fish happening and the ripple effects of that stuff can be felt for miles around.

I also agree that the actual " bait" is you and of course on the internet you are your best spokesperson on who and what you are.. And what you are looking for. So absolutely promote yourself the best you can as long as it is honest. Because lies have away of coming out and biting you in the backside

True true
I go fishing daily
Kikiki