It really has come to the stage where i have made my profile so limited for contact..

Why can some people not just respect a profile quit the abuse and stop hassling people for sex.

These are mainly men from over seas..

my profile is now least limit for messaging so my peace is restored at last.

I relate . I think people like that enjoy a , Thats why they disregard boundaries

well it might be all in how ya word your profile


for instance...I think mine is down right friendly



hahaha...it's cut down on the sheer amount rather nicely

Same thing you complained about a while back ...

ANd like I told you a while back: It's mostly because of your own vibe and profile text.
The screaming chit DON"T DO THIS AND DON'T DO THAT
and
I WILL NOT DO THIS AND I WILL NOT DO THAT

somehow attract the A-holes...
That's not something I'm making up, that's something that experts tell you. And I did experiment with it, although I never saw the point OF SCREAMING BECAUSE IT"S SO AGGRESSIVE AND RUDE!!
But I can say it indeed works. If you are aggressive and rude, what do you expect to attract?

Also a photo that shows a happier you will likely work. People that look sad come across as being vulnerable -and your profile style underwrites this- and A-holes prey on vulnerable women, NOT on strong, positive women.

So instead of whining -sorry to be so blunt-, maybe experiment with better ways and try to find something that does work without being so aggressive.
Because you know ...
The NICE men will NOT approach you with this profile either. So then you can ask yourself: why even bother being on a dating site?

I go thru these...cycles...ya we'll call em that


times when I am pretty positive, light hearted...upbeat

when I am in that kind of mood my profile is usually chipper
and pleasant...might even be funny


and then...after awhile I get fed up with the bull sheeeet

and that frustration and aggravation begins to show
I'll start listing things left and right
that I will not tolerate


oooooooooooh I got a Looooooooong list
hahahaa

however, I have noticed this tends to tick guys off
and they will let you know it

I used to make 'lists' of what I didn't want. But then you're focused on the negative, which is wrong if you want to attract a nice bloke.
So once I found out (by doing some research online) I stopped doing that.
And indeed, I got far fewer hassling emails from men, whether it is here or on other sites.

Since I've been on the forums here, some 2,5 years now, I think I've had maybe 2 sex mails. Maybe just the 1. And once a mail from a guy who was showing his lunch packet in his profile photo.
Same on other sites, I get a lot of interest, but hardly ever the "I want to sexercise you, let's meat!" kind of messages.
So it does work.

Hiya T Mommy,

I had to read your profile again,
to see how it's done...

I have found the more positive your profile is the less annoying contacts you get. A nice smiling lead photo and a photo array that shows interests attracts the nice people as well as the trolls but the delete button takes a second and then you have the nice ones to get to know.

Why waste valuable profile real estate talking to someone you don't want? And sounding like you do not know how to handle trolls which arguing with them really is showing.

My routine to respond to mail is to look at the profile first before I even read the mail and if it does not meet my criteria I just delete it. Out of country, inappropriate age, No photo(S), semi nude photos, no text, I will tell you later, kids at home; End of story.

They clearly haven't read my profile why should I bother to even read their mail? They are clearly operating from the "throw it at any female in the crowd and see who will pay attention to me so I can have someone to punish for my lousy life". So I know why waste my energy positive or negative? Often I put them on block. I don't abide/reward stupid or hard headed well and I really don't like repeating myself which many who "try anyway" will be. Goes back to the theory you don't feed a wolf. For some negative attention is just what they are seeking.

Scammers are a bit of a different story because they work from the theory of raw numbers and if you make their profile as a possible target; on line during social times, home alone, disabled, retired, angry, whiners, and previous victims draw them like flies. Just responding to them in your profile is a tell that you can't manage their "charms" and they have gotten to you because you have drawn a big target on your back.

Generally writing a profile that lists some of your date worthy interests and that you are/were a stable employee in some field besides popping out kids tends to attract the working guys who have something going for them even if they are not that big on gabbing. If you give them something polite to contact you about besides your physical characteristics you are way more likely to get a civil note of shared interest than just Hi or you are so pretty.

Being on line is not something to take to serious most of the time. You see someone interesting in a profile or forum a short note can lead to a conversation. And hopefully a meet and greet in the real world. Al the others who want to know everything but your shoe size before they ever offer to get off the computer or put their clothes you pretty much know are going to be a wanker in private chat or on the phone.