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Topic: just started dating again
stevenpwis's photo
Sun 11/11/07 01:39 PM
I am actually just starting this dating thing again, just got out of a 6 year relationship a few months ago, so I don't remember how to date. I just started dating a girl, we went out for coffee and a drink last week, we hit it off, I really enjoyed her. She asked me for the second date out to dinner, we went out to dinner then got some coffee and then we went up to her place so she could show me some paintings she drew, which were absolutely beautiful. We sat on the couch, talked and cuddled. She later asked me if just cuddling was ok, she said she was a virgin at 25. At the end of the night I tried for a good night kiss and she just put her face in my chest, is she just not ready for our first kiss? Another question I have is I asked her if she wanted to do anything today, but she said no, but then she said she wants to see me again, is she just saying that or does she really want to see me again? I really like this girl and I believe she probably likes me as well. One more question, I emailed her thanking her for the date and left a message on her voice mail thanking her, is that too much?

dragonyosh's photo
Sun 11/11/07 01:41 PM
slow down and take your time she pprobably thinks it is going to fast and is trying to slow it down

Queene123's photo
Sun 11/11/07 01:41 PM
leaving her a message and a email wanting to see her again... thats not to much, and you were being yourself...... if she cant accept that then go forward:smile:

Holly Dolly's photo
Sun 11/11/07 01:46 PM
Sounds like she was sending some mixed signals which is definitly confusing!
She might not really know what she wants yet, so if you really like her, I would let her take the lead on what happens next.
I don't think the email and voicemail is too much. If she is interested she will give you a call back!

dhutch9's photo
Sun 11/11/07 01:47 PM
You seem like a thoughtful guy. At this point, I'd wait it out and let her return the call. If she's a virgin, a good night kiss might be rushing it for her. Good luck.

no photo
Sun 11/11/07 01:49 PM
wow I think you should give up all together .... i mean you posted this same post earlier.. said the exact same thing ... quit seeking attention that is my advice

stevenpwis's photo
Sun 11/11/07 01:50 PM
thanks, I really appreciate everyones thoughts. I can't believe how fast people reply on here.

stevenpwis's photo
Sun 11/11/07 01:53 PM
if you didn't want to read it again soldier you didn't have to

TongueKISS's photo
Sun 11/11/07 01:54 PM
I think she did not go for the kiss because some men try to go for sex with kissing and she did not want you to get the wrong idea. As far as her rejecting the date she wants to see what kind of man you are... It was cute to leave a msg, it either made her smile or made her realize that maybe she could give you a chance. seems to me she wants to make sure you are not trying to be her first before she is ready. A vigin at 25 means she is waiting for marriage.

no photo
Sun 11/11/07 01:54 PM
I have no problems reading it again...... I just think you are pitty seeking to be posting it again.... just voicing my opinion...

stevenpwis's photo
Sun 11/11/07 01:57 PM
yeah tonguekiss, she actually told me that she wants an actual white wedding because she has seen weddings where the brides have kids and she doesn't want that

UWannaBSpontaneous's photo
Sun 11/11/07 01:58 PM
I switch strickly to phone after I've been out with the person. I find the internet impersonal for a person I'm into.

I won't say slow but pacing and timing is good....

If she says she wants to see you again just accept that. I never ask if a person wants to go out again because you can tell generally if their level of interest matches yours. That's the real key... Some people like to be hooked at the hips and some like to have some space.

I'd wait until she responds first from here out.

J


stevenpwis's photo
Sun 11/11/07 02:05 PM
thanks j

MicheleNC's photo
Sun 11/11/07 03:26 PM
Ahhhh, Steven, you did no wrong. An email and phone call is acceptable. Don't keep calling and emailing though. Give her some time to breathe.

If she said no, maybe she had other plans. If she said she does want to see you again, leave her at her word. If she really wants to see you again, she will be in touch.

As for the kissing, I agree with Tonguekiss. If she is chaste, she will want to stay that way and sometimes one thing leads to another. If this does work, realize that you will be taking it very very slow.

Take care and let us know what happens, M


mbcasey's photo
Sun 11/11/07 03:31 PM
She told you she was a virgin...that is very special if you think about it. She cannot be rushed and if you like her alot, take things very slow and careful.

It's not like she seems like the type to "step out" on a guy she is interested in. So respect her space, be patient and good luck!!

unsure's photo
Sun 11/11/07 03:34 PM
Aww Steven, I think it was really nice of you to call her and send the email. I agree about the kiss...maybe she just wanted to wait. To be honest, a lot of women do not kiss on the first date...I don't feel comfortable kissing on the first date. A hug is fine but a kiss is left for later on.
I think what you need to do now is just wait for her to respond and leave it all up to her. Let her get ahold of you, you just don't want to seem to pushy. A pushy guy is a big turn off...just be patient and see what happens!!
Good luck and keep being a gentleman flowerforyou

stevenpwis's photo
Sun 11/11/07 06:10 PM
thank you all for the great advice, I just have to wait for her call, hopefully I will get that soon.

PJ1987's photo
Sun 11/11/07 06:14 PM
Don't feel bad Steven, I just got out of a 5 year relationship and he never took me on a date, so we're in the same boat, lol.ohwell

Duffy's photo
Sun 11/11/07 06:14 PM
he wants information and feedback. ball is in her court. see which way it bounces.

stevenpwis's photo
Sun 11/11/07 06:26 PM
I believe she had a good time with me, so I just have to wait it out, especially since she did say she wants to see me again.

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