Topic: Why are people so bent on finding their soulmate
mrmotivator1234's photo
Fri 09/30/16 07:57 PM
I think soulmate is a silly word, Why not just be happy with true love. I seems that everybody is looking for their so called soulmate. what happens you love breaks apart does that mean you have made a mistake.

no photo
Sat 10/01/16 11:18 AM
Why are people so bent on finding their soulmate

Why are people so bent on caring what other people do
Especially on the internet where 99% of the population are those you will never meet in person, and most likely never know existed

I think soulmate is a silly word

And that might also (along with the bent on caring what other people do) be part of the answer.
Unsolicited you felt compelled to find other people to make sure they know you think "soulmate" is a silly word.
Not just anybody, people on a dating site.

Life just wasn't good enough without going out and finding people to know how you felt and what you thought.

And if you reply to my post? If you read what I type and have any kind of desire to respond to what I say? Whether it's to agree or disagree?

Then you are looking for a specific individual to make sure that one person understands you, knows how you feel, validates your thoughts and feelings. Some kind of connection. Dominance is still a type of connection, "I think he's a jerk/wrong/idiot and I'm going to give them a piece of my mind!"

That feeling that compels you to give a crap what some nameless, faceless, stranger you will never know, never meet, never understand how they exist somewhere out in the universe, is part of the same impetus that drives people to find someone they actually care about to know their name, their face, to share their existence somewhere out in the universe, with a desire for that to be reciprocated.

Most people are selfish and just want. "I want you to understand me! I want you to know me! I want you to listen to me! I just want to be happy! I just want to be loved! I want I want I want. I am just fine with this, that, and the other so I should get it because good enough isn't asking for too much."

Some people are either unselfish, or a little more practical.
"I want you to understand me, and I want to understand you! I want you to know me, and I want to know you! I want you to listen to me, and I want to listen to you! I want to be happy and realize happy is doing, so I want to make you happy and thereby get you to want to make me happy. I want I want I want, and either I care what you want too, or I simply want but believe I have to care what you want in order to most effectively get what I want. And I don't want it to be difficult."

That is ultimately a soul mate.

Why not just be happy with true love.

Many people equate true love to finding their soul mate.
So...unless you explicitly define what you mean by true love and soulmate separately, showing how they're different, there's nothing to say people aren't happy with true love.

Because it seems it would be more appropriate to ask "why not just be happy with settling for good enough, or a disparate relationship where someone loves you (truly) more than you love them."

what happens you love breaks apart does that mean you have made a mistake.

Only if you don't value the love you had, or you were under the misapprehension that love is like a light switch; if you can just find it in the dark and turn it on then it'll shine brightly forever and solve all, or any, problems. Constantly providing warmth and security.


Other than that, maybe this will mean something.
People don't grow up. Adults are not children that enter a chrysalis at 18 and transform into completely new creatures with all new habits and ideas.

Adults, people, are just children with a lot more experience and information. Same needs, same desires, same appetites, just greater understanding (to different degrees) of the consequences of the choices made to fulfill those needs, desires, and appetites, and different levels of willingness to accept the consequences of their choices.

You ever try to get a kid to eat something it doesn't want?
Perceived need of hunger. They want hot dogs and potato chips and coke and you keep trying to get them to want carrots.
"Why not just be happy with basic necessary nutrition. I seems that everybody is looking for their so called soul food. what happens you eat something like hot dogs, chips, and soda for 30 years and your body breaks apart does that mean you have made a mistake."

Is it a mistake to live how other people constantly think you should (especially when they're being driven by their own self interest), or to live chasing what you think, or know, will make you happiest, cause the least, or relieve the most, amount of stress/unhappiness.

Is it a bigger mistake to love something and have it break apart, to constantly seek something to love even though it might break apart, or to try and become "everybody's" parent and wonder why they aren't clamoring for carrots.



Dodo_David's photo
Sat 10/01/16 11:22 AM

I think soulmate is a silly word, Why not just be happy with true love.



tmh1063's photo
Sat 10/01/16 11:50 AM
I don't put too much stock in the words Soul Mate and True Love because we are all looking for the same thing. In my opinion, some people simply romanticize it more by calling it a Soul Mate or True Love. We are all basically looking for the same thing. Someone who loves us and accepts us for who we are, someone who can be our best friend and companion. Someone who understands us and will stand by us through thick and thin. Someone who will stand at our side when the going gets tough and help us through it. Someone who can become "family" to us.

The exception is someone who is looking for a meal ticket aka financial security and those people we call scammers. Unfortunately for us there are a lot of them on this site. If they can live without love, good luck to them. I don't choose to live that way and I am not taken in by all their BS.

no photo
Sat 10/01/16 12:11 PM
Where's my BAE


msharmony's photo
Sat 10/01/16 03:50 PM
Edited by msharmony on Sat 10/01/16 03:52 PM
am I looking for a soulmate or a feeling Im told soulmates provide?


msharmony's photo
Sat 10/01/16 03:50 PM
am I looking for a soulmate or a feeling Im told soulmates provide?


sparkyae5's photo
Sat 10/01/16 03:52 PM
Edited by sparkyae5 on Sat 10/01/16 03:58 PM


its a fact most people pick there emotional opposite.........


social intercourse can get real complicated, with all the noise....the problem

is to give or ''get true love'' ''soul mate'' you have to be able to commit to

the the well being of another....the key word is ''commit''...few are willing....

and they end up starving to feel connected.........the first person we need to

commit our well being is to ourselves then its much easier to commit to others...

IgorFrankensteen's photo
Sat 10/01/16 04:20 PM
Oh, it's just one of the fad names for the same thing everyone has wanted since forever.

Someone who feels right to be with through thick and thin.

The unusual people, are the ones who think it doesn't matter who they are with, and who will therefore sleep with anything that happens by.

tanyaann's photo
Sat 10/01/16 07:55 PM

Where's my BAE




I am here, darling! Sorry I have been gone so long! flowerforyou

BreakingGood's photo
Sun 10/02/16 09:16 PM
Edited by BreakingGood on Sun 10/02/16 09:18 PM
I thought people were hell bent on the Soul Man.


no photo
Sun 10/02/16 09:20 PM
Why are people so bent on caring what other people do
Especially on the internet where 99% of the population are those you will never meet in person, and most likely never know existed


lol