got messages from men.
setting things clear from the start that I just want to be friends. they agreed. then you tell stories to get to know each other. After several exchanges, topics of wanting a relationship from you gets in. Then remind him of the purpose of conversing, and telling him not to be disrespectful and that he can't control me and push his way.
Then, all of a sudden, he tells you "you have high standard."

Really... i don't think so.

I just don't believe that you can fall easily to someone you hardly know. Trust and respect should be the foundation of any relationship..just saying..

That's because unfortunately lots of men think about dating sites as a kind of market where a woman offer herself. So they perceive normal things as "high standards'.

quote]
That's because unfortunately lots of men think about dating sites as a kind of market where a woman offer herself. So they perceive normal things as "high standards'.



I guess they're used to girls who easily say yes

Good job sticking to what you want... Lol and it the same for us guys.

I personally don't think your standards are high...

I guess they're used to girls who easily say yes


More along the line of girls who say they are looking for friendship, but 4th message in are making wedding plans.

I know, right.

I guess they're used to girls who easily say yes



they are gonna push your boundaries to see if you really mean what you say you do


then you have to decide if you want to continue talking to this person

I don't think this is even as deep or rational as that the guys in question are "used to girls giving in."

It reads more like the most common way that immature people react to being told no: with petty petulance.

Here, that's vague.
Guys, people, can easily interpret that as "friends first, and then more" or, "it can be more as soon as you start having friendly feelings towards me, you get to decide when that is, but you then have to prove it."

That dictum, the whole "friends first" bs people believe in is just creating hoops, usually as a means of circumventing healthy communication.
That is ultimately a "game." Once you start playing games, so do they.


So basically you try to emotionally bond with them.


You can "fall easily to someone you hardly know" when it's based on fantasy.

And that's what happens online.

Since it's not in person, you don't get the majority of communication necessary to all relationships. Indirect, body language, facial expressions, voice tone, physical expression, interaction with an environment.

You get black and white text and have to fill in the rest via your own imagination and bias.

You can fall easily when 90% of what you believe about someone is based on your own assumptions and imagination.
You fall for an idea of a person, which is made up of mostly ideas about yourself and how you think the world "should" be.



Other than that, I'd be curious to know (as a fly on the wall as opposed to any response on the forums which would be pointless since I could never trust your answer):
What if one guy was your "just friend" online, you told stories to get to know each other, you were conversing.
And then you wanted more than to be "just friends."
But he said "sorry, you said you just wanted to be a friend, you set that boundary. I will not break the boundaries of the relationship you defined in the beginning no matter what."
I wonder what you'd do then.

I agree with the comments here. Some men are excited by the challenge of turning a woman's no into a yes. And they often get resentful and petty after their efforts fail and the no remains firm.

Along with the high standards comment, prepare yourself for other tantrum outbursts.

"That' s why you're still single!"
' I bet you're frigid"
You think you are all that! I never liked you anyway :)

" be prepared to be alone"

no worries I am

Either that or "you're gonna die alone!"

Why would I care about dying alone?

Won't I be too dead to notice ?

Dear all persons not same here, hope you will find then post that still have good heart in this world. Best Regards.