Oh you thought this was one of those

"uhhh, derrr, hey yo, hot sexy philadelphia ladies hit me up huh huh huh"

Rest assured that's just not my style. I just wanted to take the time to tell you all about this wonderful, amazing, city that I live in.

The cuisine must be great, it's made the list at number 2 for america's fattest city. Woohooo, time to celebrate with slabs of beef, covered in cheese, smothered in cheese whiz (the name of which not so coincidentally sounds like a block of cheddar took a piss on your sandwhich).

Philly recently was named Ugliest City in Leisure magazine. Now they're not talking about the wonderful bouquet that smells like a garbage can had a love affair with a urinal. They mean that the people of philly have mugs not even your blind mother could love. Well, I plan on leaving so that should bump us up a few notches. Our city mascot is now the manatee (also known as the butt of the sea)

Philadelphia has one of the highest crime rates among large city. Only Detroit people bust more caps in more asses than the citizens of the city of brotherly love. Incidently those numbers are largely filled by one brother shooting another brother.

Philly is the worst sports city EVER. We got the Eagles, Sixers, Phillies and Flyers. and zero winners.

We say we're tough, resilient, we don't give up. Actually we just get the image of our city persona from a movie that came out in the 70's about a retarded boxer.


So there you have it, a tourist brochure of Philly written by one of it's own. We're fat, we're ugly, we kill each other at alarming rates, we don't win, and we like watching the mentally handicapped engage in the pugilistic arts. Come here, it'll make you feel better about yourself and your life.

Appears to be the wrong forum.....

Rocky isn't retarded and wan't fictional detective Virgil Tibbs from philly