I think one could say there's two forms that could take:
1 Open relationship because you want sex with others too
2 Open relationship not based on lust and sex, but more on love

Nr 1 is never an option for me.
Nr 2, I fully understand the concept, and in a way agree with it as I do think lifelong monogamy is BS.
Be honest, if you've been in a really long term, like 15-35 yrs, have you never thought of wanting to be with someone else? Never had those butterfly feelings for someone else?
I think anyone who says "no" to that is either lying or semi-dead. We are trained by society -read "church"- to only stick to one partner, so we suppress those feelings if at all possible.
But what is actually wrong with loving someone else apart from your partner? Nothing really, except for the fact that ppl's egos cannot handle it.
If you have a beautiful loving thing with someone else, it doesn't diminish the love for your partner. Nor does it mean you now want to share your life -as in get married- with that person.
You can be totally devoted and in love with your wife/husband and have loving feelings for and with another, share intimacy with them and so on.
It's a different kind of love.

Human beings are not limited to loving just one person. That's what religion and patriarchal society has made us believe, but it is not true.
If it were true, we could never love a new partner either after a divorce or losing a spouse another way.
We wouldn't be able to love more than 1 child either.
Our hearts are big, we can love many people, it's just all different forms and levels of love.

Never noticed that you loved one partner more than another? Not that you loved that one less, it was just another form of love. A different level or tier. With one you may have a very deep soul connection, not so much with the other.
Yet, you loved them both, spent part of your life with both.
It's similar with having more partners.
And with this 'philosophy' it's not about lust and sex, it's also not that you are deliberately looking for another person. It's just that if you happen to meet someone, like a colleague for instance, and there is some click and chemistry -not just lust!!!!-, then what the heck is wrong with it?
If you take religion, patriarchal brainwashing out of the equation, the answer is:
NOTHING.

Personally I cannot handle it, ego... But on a higher level I can understand it and to be honest wished I COULD handle it, because that would mean I could live and feel and be unconditional love. Free from ego.

For *me*, as an INTJ..I can't focus on more than one person.
meanimng, if I find someone I like, have a lot in common with, enjoy spending time with, my brain just doesn't go "hmm...wonder what else is out there?"
It's focused on the person i am with, and the experiences we share..

IF someone *can* focus on more than one person, and that is what they want..I have no problem with it...not *my* thing, but..I don't live with them, i am not involved with them, so..no skin off my nose.

Also, i guess i am (by your opinion) semi-dead, and have been since i was a teenager.
I don't do serial dating...I never "slept around"..
Ifi go out woth someone, and find it isn't what i want, thren I make that plain, and try again with someone else..not keep themon a string *while* looking for someone else..

Its about "focus"...
Like some people can multi-task with ease....

Me, if *I* get too spread out among too many different things/ task..I lose focus, and NONE of them are done well, and saome don't get done at all...

So, *I* know I function best by focusing one *one* thing at a time.

The open marriage has worked for Wil Smith and Jada Pinkett-Smith, but their kids are a mess.

I couldn't do it. My grandma always said "don't date someone you wouldn't want to marry" and she's right. I may have admiration for other people but not love enough to want to go loving somebody else the same way I love my husband. Matrimonial love is different than lust, the love for a child, the love for nature, the love for a best friend. The bond of marriage has a repesct factor that goes along with it and I couldn't cross it. Previous husbands...felt differently.

I want kids that are messed up so I am all for an open marriage. But seriously, what is the point of being married if it is going to be an open one? What is the definition of an open marriage? It is an agreement between the husband and wife to permit one or both of them to have sexual relationships with other people. So I ask again what is the point of being married then? I am a one woman man and I would give my devotion and attention to that one woman, to abide by the wedding vows made before God. I could go to any bar and pick up a woman for sexual relations. Don't need to be married for that. So I am totally against the idea. Unfortunately my ex felt differently so that is why she is an ex.

Senseless. Bad for a family.

swinging is fun and exciting

ive always wanted to dabble in the swingers scene

If a marriage is open to look for other people, you're not married.

Hi Damien 92 - I am old but I'm not dead ! you have NO interests listed. NO information. now not even the most desperate woman is going to just look at your cool photo and contact you. If you want to start meeting people, take 20 minutes and fill out the form...
for example, read MY profile. no i am not asking to be your friend or date you, but it will give you an idea of what kind of things to write.
good luck.

u agree so I agree

Why marry then !! Just date !

????????????

IMO/IME they are little different than dating single moms with children that are waaaay too old to be living at home.

My thoughts are I'm thankful I've never deluded myself to the point I thought they were a good idea.


Usually people with "more to give" turn to philanthropy rather than philandery.
To open a "marriage" to other individuals rather than going out as partners to "spread the extra love" in the community seems selfish, narcissistic, to me.