Topic: Opinions please
Dragoness's photo
Mon 04/13/09 02:42 PM
My best friend is currently in a (in my opinion sick) relationship with a guy who has a drug problem so she is currently keeping his money and doling it out to him when she feels he needs it.

I told her she is in a relationship with a boy, in my opinion, not a man. I asked her if she likes it better this way than if he was manly and kept his own business straight, she said she did not know.


The opinions I would like are, given this situation would women consider this sick mothering and from the mans side, would this be acceptable at any level to you.

Just curious.


I have been trying to work with her but she needs counseling and refuses to go. I cannot really help her it seems but I am trying to be a friend still and be honest with how I feel about stuff.

motowndowntown's photo
Mon 04/13/09 02:46 PM
Yes she is mothering him. She is also acting as an enabler. He is a drug addict. They both need help.

AZAR09's photo
Mon 04/13/09 02:46 PM
You have done all that you can, the rest is up to her. All you can do now is be there if and when she falls.

Winx's photo
Mon 04/13/09 02:50 PM
Dragoness,

She's enabling him. Many people with addicts in their lives (parents included) feel like they are protecting the addict but he needs to see the consequences of his actions. Maybe suggest that she goes to a Nar-Anon meeting.

MirrorMirror's photo
Mon 04/13/09 02:51 PM
flowerforyou I no longer have high expectations about people.flowerforyou

flowerforyou I expect people to be people.flowerforyou

no photo
Mon 04/13/09 02:51 PM

Yes she is mothering him. She is also acting as an enabler. He is a drug addict. They both need help.



DITTO DITTO DITTO.

tngxl65's photo
Mon 04/13/09 02:56 PM
To the question, no I wouldn't like it and wouldn't allow it. But I do have to agree with the others regarding enabling. I'm not saying he will be better off without her, but I don't think he'll make a change for himself if she keeps this up. I also think it's very unhealthy for her.