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| Topic: Dating with a serious illness | |
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Edited by
mg1959
on
Sat 10/26/13 09:09 PM
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I think threads like these are pretty great to have on mingle. It helps us see a very important side to each other. Illnesses for example brings out the real us, whether we are the one ill or not. Izzy, sorry for no answer, not sure I got the question. It almost sounded like you were asking me if a do mercy sex, but maybe that's not where you were going with it. I know the scene you were talking about in fight club and found it sad even though the twist the movie put on it was pretty interesting. great movie, with all of it's darkness yet deeper meaning You could call it mercy sex if you wanted. I guess it wouldn't be to far off from that. But I was going for someone who is on the verge of death and looks really bad vs getting into a relationship with a perfectly healthy person who is also very attractive. Maybe I should have put it this way. If you had a supermodel and someone who looked like they just came out of a Nazi concentration camp. Could you really honestly say that you would give both an equal chance to win your heart? It is human nature to seek out healthy people. It gives the best chance of offspring. I don't think it has anything to do with being shallow. Its about the biological need to procreate and the best chance of doing that is with healthier people. That's probably why I personally am not attracted to people who look like walking skeletons who should be staring on the walking dead. lol Hi Izzy got ya this time. Thanks for clearing up. Well my wife was a model so I guess that's the answer, but I think we met because of us both being in the entertainment biz. When I did relief work I was attracted to a different type, and on I think it goes for me. I believe I'm probably more attracted to someone I find interesting or have a bond with somehow, more than I am looking at them. Example, a jazz signer who I was seeing and a designer (in a wheel chair BTW). I can think of many more women who grabbed my attention and it had nothing to do with looks. I say that but to me they were very good looking. A question for you. Ever be sitting somewhere and a woman who you don't see walks behind you and you get a smell and a vibe from her? You can feel her presence and it makes you turn around? That to me is attractive. Ever do some hard labor type (like I helped in this earthquake) thing and was working side by side with these women. They were spanish and didn't know english well. While working with them we ate and slept and showered all in very close quarters. Even in the middle of that I found myself extremely attracted to this one gal. There was something in your voice and the way she carried herself that drove me crazy. You've never had this? Lastly, there was a lady (from mingle) who emailed me and asked me if I liked younger women. She told me her story and it wasn't a pretty one, and she showed me pics and I could see she was for real. We talked on the phone often. This gal would be either in a chair or need serious theropy for the rest of her life. She also would have had to go through some very serious mental stuff to make it through, but even with that I went pretty much head over heels for her, and very likely if she would have been able to over come her situation of dealing with men again I probably would have hopped on the plane. You haven't experienced anything like this before? Maybe I'm weird but there's something about the heartbeat of potentual love that makes me go blind, and I feel bad even saying that because the truth is I think all these women and a great deal more are absolutely beautiful. I see girls on hear everyday that I think are absolutely stuning. I don't want to put them on the spot but I think, are the guys blind or what. To me I see them give an answer and it makes me take notice. I think "I would love to spend my time talking to someone like that the rest of my life". I believe that the soul of a woman goes way past her physical apperance or health. Everyone has a story, a history and a special gift. You know there may be someone close to you right now that you would look at as an ugly duckling through the wrong eyes, but put on the corrective vision and you may find them to be the godess you've always been looking for. I don't make this up as I go, it's just the way I see it. I'm not looking at a girl for offspring, if you are that's you. I'm not looking for a girl for sex. Sex is easy. I'm not sure I'm even looking for a girl period except for the fact that when we do meet my hands get sweaty and I'll be at a loss of words all over again. But do I look at a girls medical record? maybe on the 3rd date (just kidding) Oh BTW, would I marry a girl with HIV? Does she mind if my feet get smelly is a bigger question. You know cancer was the no no at one time, and so was TB, and now there is AIDs Oh and lets not forget "fat" and count them. Does this mean that we are to cut off our heartbeats? Sorry, let me add this. Do I have any idea who I'm going to fall in love with? No clue. |
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Well I spent most of my school days being teased to the point that I would rather see those people dead or at least is prison getting rape by their cell mates.
I'm not a very social person because of my history and I'm not a very trusting person. I'm not here to find my wife and I didn't say I would simply reject a person for being sick. But I'm not going to eat poison for love. Get what I mean by that? I can be a friend to just about anyone as long as their not retarded. I'm not talking about being handicapped either. I mean if you're really stupid then you're going to get on my nerves and I'm going to wonder how you survived for so long. I remember once sitting in a van and some girl walked by and I could smell her perfume from inside the van. I liked the smell. but if I could smell it that well from inside I would have to imagine that it would have been suffocating if I had been outside the van. It may have made me nauseated. I've been attracted to different types of girls. Some because of their physical looks and some because of talking to them. On here I look at 2KidsMom and Jesusprincessmt to be my friends. But I am here to play with scammers if I find them. But I can't seem to find vary many of them on here. Maybe they're smarter then I think they are and they actually do go through the forums and read the things I say about them being stupid so they don't want to play with me. If I make friends of any sort on here then that's fine with me. If I find a woman who despite my faults wants to be with me and I want to be with her. That would fine too. lol |
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You never know who's going to sneak in and steal your heart. We might think we have a handle on this then bamm. Someone comes by that makes us forget about our shopping list of why's and why not's.
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That is true. But if you want to talk about picky. You should meet my cousin. He won't seriously talk to a girl unless she's got blond hair and he's got a bigger desire to get married then I do. That doesn't mean I want to be single. But I know there are worse things than dying alone. Marrying someone who is simply evil is one of those things.
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You never know who's going to sneak in and steal your heart. We might think we have a handle on this then bamm. Someone comes by that makes us forget about our shopping list of why's and why not's. 
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wow it's amazing how many people are saying "Crazy" I didn't say it's a mental illness.. I have Multiple Sclerosis. It has slowed my life down. I'm in pain every day.. I haven't really dated since I got my diagnosis because I've felt that with having a serious disease like MS most men would rather be with someone who is healthy and fit and able to go out and paint the town red.
I tend to enjoy just cuddling up and watching a movie or a tv show. I tossed that question out there because I'm not sure if I should keep my profile on here. I'm starting to think it's pointless. |
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wow it's amazing how many people are saying "Crazy" I didn't say it's a mental illness.. I have Multiple Sclerosis. It has slowed my life down. I'm in pain every day.. I haven't really dated since I got my diagnosis because I've felt that with having a serious disease like MS most men would rather be with someone who is healthy and fit and able to go out and paint the town red. I tend to enjoy just cuddling up and watching a movie or a tv show. I tossed that question out there because I'm not sure if I should keep my profile on here. I'm starting to think it's pointless. Leave your profile here  ...Connections happen when you least expect them ....Participate!...Let people get to know you ...Nothing ventured, nothing gained... |
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I think threads like these are pretty great to have on mingle. It helps us see a very important side to each other. Illnesses for example brings out the real us, whether we are the one ill or not. Izzy, sorry for no answer, not sure I got the question. It almost sounded like you were asking me if a do mercy sex, but maybe that's not where you were going with it. I know the scene you were talking about in fight club and found it sad even though the twist the movie put on it was pretty interesting. great movie, with all of it's darkness yet deeper meaning You could call it mercy sex if you wanted. I guess it wouldn't be to far off from that. But I was going for someone who is on the verge of death and looks really bad vs getting into a relationship with a perfectly healthy person who is also very attractive. Maybe I should have put it this way. If you had a supermodel and someone who looked like they just came out of a Nazi concentration camp. Could you really honestly say that you would give both an equal chance to win your heart? It is human nature to seek out healthy people. It gives the best chance of offspring. I don't think it has anything to do with being shallow. Its about the biological need to procreate and the best chance of doing that is with healthier people. That's probably why I personally am not attracted to people who look like walking skeletons who should be staring on the walking dead. lol Hi Izzy got ya this time. Thanks for clearing up. Well my wife was a model so I guess that's the answer, but I think we met because of us both being in the entertainment biz. When I did relief work I was attracted to a different type, and on I think it goes for me. I believe I'm probably more attracted to someone I find interesting or have a bond with somehow, more than I am looking at them. Example, a jazz signer who I was seeing and a designer (in a wheel chair BTW). I can think of many more women who grabbed my attention and it had nothing to do with looks. I say that but to me they were very good looking. A question for you. Ever be sitting somewhere and a woman who you don't see walks behind you and you get a smell and a vibe from her? You can feel her presence and it makes you turn around? That to me is attractive. Ever do some hard labor type (like I helped in this earthquake) thing and was working side by side with these women. They were spanish and didn't know english well. While working with them we ate and slept and showered all in very close quarters. Even in the middle of that I found myself extremely attracted to this one gal. There was something in your voice and the way she carried herself that drove me crazy. You've never had this? Lastly, there was a lady (from mingle) who emailed me and asked me if I liked younger women. She told me her story and it wasn't a pretty one, and she showed me pics and I could see she was for real. We talked on the phone often. This gal would be either in a chair or need serious theropy for the rest of her life. She also would have had to go through some very serious mental stuff to make it through, but even with that I went pretty much head over heels for her, and very likely if she would have been able to over come her situation of dealing with men again I probably would have hopped on the plane. You haven't experienced anything like this before? Maybe I'm weird but there's something about the heartbeat of potentual love that makes me go blind, and I feel bad even saying that because the truth is I think all these women and a great deal more are absolutely beautiful. I see girls on hear everyday that I think are absolutely stuning. I don't want to put them on the spot but I think, are the guys blind or what. To me I see them give an answer and it makes me take notice. I think "I would love to spend my time talking to someone like that the rest of my life". I believe that the soul of a woman goes way past her physical apperance or health. Everyone has a story, a history and a special gift. You know there may be someone close to you right now that you would look at as an ugly duckling through the wrong eyes, but put on the corrective vision and you may find them to be the godess you've always been looking for. I don't make this up as I go, it's just the way I see it. I'm not looking at a girl for offspring, if you are that's you. I'm not looking for a girl for sex. Sex is easy. I'm not sure I'm even looking for a girl period except for the fact that when we do meet my hands get sweaty and I'll be at a loss of words all over again. But do I look at a girls medical record? maybe on the 3rd date (just kidding) Oh BTW, would I marry a girl with HIV? Does she mind if my feet get smelly is a bigger question. You know cancer was the no no at one time, and so was TB, and now there is AIDs Oh and lets not forget "fat" and count them. Does this mean that we are to cut off our heartbeats? Sorry, let me add this. Do I have any idea who I'm going to fall in love with? No clue. Here Here MG!  Jennwren Stay, we'll share a laugh or two... all of us together, the sick, the healthy, the morons and the compassionate. We'll share our views and opinions, post a powerful or sexy pictures. We can help one another cope with life... no matter what kind of life you're living at this time. Everything is in constant state of change... Join us! |
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wow it's amazing how many people are saying "Crazy" I didn't say it's a mental illness.. I have Multiple Sclerosis. It has slowed my life down. I'm in pain every day.. I haven't really dated since I got my diagnosis because I've felt that with having a serious disease like MS most men would rather be with someone who is healthy and fit and able to go out and paint the town red. I tend to enjoy just cuddling up and watching a movie or a tv show. I tossed that question out there because I'm not sure if I should keep my profile on here. I'm starting to think it's pointless. There is different types of illness honey. I thought of both physical and mental. You may have been thinking of physical because of what you have. But that doesn't mean you can't find someone to be with. Not everyone wan't to go out, get drunk and wake up in a drunk tank. You never know what you may find by leaving your profile up. But I know you won't find anything by taking it down. At least you won't find anything here by take it down. |
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I've fell in love with quite a variety over the years. Some were quiet, some were loud, some were ill with different things, some were "ugly ducklings", some were "hot as hell", one was in a wheelchair. So, never say never. lol. You never think whether someone could have an illness, when you first meet. All I know is when I want a guy, I fall REALLY deeply in love with that person. My love for a guy always feels pretty huge.
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Edited by
ridewytepony
on
Wed 10/30/13 11:16 PM
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I've fell in love with quite a variety over the years. Some were quiet, some were loud, some were ill with different things, some were "ugly ducklings", some were "hot as hell", one was in a wheelchair. So, never say never. lol. You never think whether someone could have an illness, when you first meet. All I know is when I want a guy, I fall REALLY deeply in love with that person. My love for a guy always feels pretty huge. I also fall deep in love and have always been loyal and sexually content but have had a string full of woman with alcoholism,drugs mental illness ranging from bi-polar 'victim' syndrome emotional trauma, mentally, physically and sexually abuse. This is mentally stressful and require a strong man,but your never the man in the end you were in the beginning. These are all precursors, that cause an end to the relationship. Medications seemed it was never the right stuff or combinations.? Non of them could stay functional in the work force. I just don't want to raise an adult that can never be raised, as things can revert so quickly. I refuse to float somebody's boat that thinks life's a fight and/or a party.. I can't take the aggravation day in day out. one day I hear "I love you,please be careful at work";to "I hope you get squished by a tree today. Now I haven't been with someone with physician limitations,so that would come down to compatibility and attraction,as the norm. If they are drooling in their soup then that's not attractive. some people can be home care workers and some just don't have the parts...and that's just how we are built. I don't believe that it positively makes them shallow. Not to many men can obtain the skills and mentally focus in a timely fashion to stay safe and produce a quota in a highly physically demanding environment either, but it doesn't make then a p u s s y! Ps: srry Rawrr, hows life? I started with your quote then it just blended in to other things I read on here. its like my poems...I never no where they're going to go.  is that normal? do you write like that? like you start and it just comes to you, or often you have a good idea?  I know jokes are almost instant,after reading something or writing they come as I write.  |
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All I know is when I want a guy, I fall REALLY deeply in love with that person. My love for a guy always feels pretty huge. Same here, it sort of sucks...(for me) |
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Anyone who is really honest knows that there is something wrong with all of us.
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Anyone who is really honest knows that there is something wrong with all of us. 
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I wouldn't say it's pointless, you could be perfectly healthy and not be able to find anyone on here. So you never know.
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I don't know, Izzy I think you are kind of mean. I just don't think you understand about illness...I have been sick for over 13 years now and I think I have dealt with it pretty good. I do not have any mental issues it is all physical, I had cancer and I survived that. Now I have migraines and that makes my life a MAYBE LIFE!!!
I think before you judge each person, you should get to know something about their illness and not be afraid. Lets face it, we all are going to die one day..we just do not know when. MG...I think you are a man with class. It is a shame that more people do not feel the same about the human race like you do. Kudo's to you my friend JENN...never give up on finding love, someone that is a true gentleman will love you for YOU. Welcome to Mingle btw! As for me...I think I have said enough...have a good weekend everyone!!
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Wow all I can say is literally MILIONS of people with various disabilities, conditions, and illness not only date, fall in love, and marry every day so this question makes me a little crazy.
Read my Lips LIFE HAPPENS. PLAY THE CARDS YOU ARE DELT TO WIN. If I would have just given up and quit when at 19 years old had a room full of doctors and military officer's (that to me at the time were pretty much God) told me that they thought I might have Multiple Sclerosis but they really were not sure looked like I should go home and quickly get my affairs in order. That is code for whatever life you thought you were going to have they don't think you are going to have. Well Guess what I had that life! I found a boyfriend, got married, had a child, had a home, had businesses, got a divorce, did the single Mom thing, fell in love again, married, moved all over the country, was widowed, got my kids educated, married, done the Grandma thing, and have taken care of many in my family. So what at times it was in a wheelchair or on braces and crutches, sometimes blind, in and out of hospitals and so many doctors offices and support groups that some folks think I am a human resource directory or a pin cushion. lol. Was it always easy? Nope. Did I have to recruit help? You bet. Was it a great life YES. And I plan on sticking around another twenty years and enjoying the heck out of retirement, with great friends, and likely an awesome man I can just love to pieces. I certainly have the experience and still have the physical ability that often wears people thirty my junior out. I am NOT telling you this to brag because I can find a hundred people who have done the same thing. So my question is why not you? |
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Edited by
jacktrades
on
Sat 11/02/13 09:36 PM
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Real love is compassion,and looks past all problems, the mental and the physical. Never give up your desire to be in love because out there is someone for you. God bless you.
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I have had to deal with relationships who are mentally unstable in various aspects, as well as physically disabled, but my compassion and care for them as persons went beyond what I felt I could handle initially. If you trust in your own compassion for others, the strength will be there to handle what needs to be handled because of your unselfish love for another human being. Believe it or not, it will also enhance your own understanding of truly loving someone. That, to me, is the quintessential description of what true love is all about. It's not how handsome or beautiful they are outside that makes them a person. A person is the beauty which is within, and despite what we look like on the outside, everyone has some kind of appreciable beauty within. For those who are trying to decide to keep their profiles up or not, my statement is this--Keep your profile up, your special person may be just around the corner! JMHO. Best wishes to every person out there!
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