Topic: What is the biblical action to this?
Ladywind7's photo
Sat 09/19/15 09:10 AM
You are married. You discover he/she has a heavy drug or alcohol dependance that they have sneakily been hiding from you.
It has been two years since you discovered this addiction and therapy, christian counseling, rehab has been tried and your spouse still uses/drinks.
The marriage is in shreds because your spouse has lied so much, all trust is gone.
As a believer what would you do with a spouse who is in the throws of addiction?

Dodo_David's photo
Sun 09/20/15 02:21 AM

You are married. You discover he/she has a heavy drug or alcohol dependance that they have sneakily been hiding from you.
It has been two years since you discovered this addiction and therapy, christian counseling, rehab has been tried and your spouse still uses/drinks.
The marriage is in shreds because your spouse has lied so much, all trust is gone.
As a believer what would you do with a spouse who is in the throws of addiction?



Try Al-Anon.

Annierooroo's photo
Sun 09/20/15 02:39 AM
Pray and wait till you hear from God.
If your life and the life of your children are in danger get out.

That's a hard question as every situation is different. Only you know in your heart what the Lord is tellingyou what to do

Ladywind7's photo
Sun 09/20/15 01:54 PM
Edited by Ladywind7 on Sun 09/20/15 01:54 PM


You are married. You discover he/she has a heavy drug or alcohol dependance that they have sneakily been hiding from you.
It has been two years since you discovered this addiction and therapy, christian counseling, rehab has been tried and your spouse still uses/drinks.
The marriage is in shreds because your spouse has lied so much, all trust is gone.
As a believer what would you do with a spouse who is in the throws of addiction?



Try Al-Anon.


Great suggestion but is Al Anon run by people who would have the biblical answer to this? :smile:

Ladywind7's photo
Sun 09/20/15 01:55 PM

Pray and wait till you hear from God.
If your life and the life of your children are in danger get out.

That's a hard question as every situation is different. Only you know in your heart what the Lord is telling you what to do


That is good advice for the person affected.

dreamerana's photo
Sun 09/20/15 02:14 PM

You are married. You discover he/she has a heavy drug or alcohol dependance that they have sneakily been hiding from you.
It has been two years since you discovered this addiction and therapy, christian counseling, rehab has been tried and your spouse still uses/drinks.
The marriage is in shreds because your spouse has lied so much, all trust is gone.
As a believer what would you do with a spouse who is in the throws of addiction?



it's important to consider the safety of your children as well as yourself.
you talk in your post about Christian counseling. I'm definitely not an expert but I would say talk to your spiritual leader and pray for guidance.

at the same time I would seek help in the lsyman world.

only you know what your particular faith says about divorce and separation.
some marriages can be annulled if it can be shown the marriage took place under deceitful circumstances.
some if you're married by the church, you can get divorced under civil law but remain married under God's law.
your church leader would be the one who can best answer your questions.
praying for the best for you

Ladywind7's photo
Sun 09/20/15 02:19 PM
Aw thanks, I will pass that info on. My understanding is Ministers/spiritual leaders differ in viewpoint though. So hearing from God personally is best.

metalwing's photo
Sun 09/20/15 02:26 PM



You are married. You discover he/she has a heavy drug or alcohol dependance that they have sneakily been hiding from you.
It has been two years since you discovered this addiction and therapy, christian counseling, rehab has been tried and your spouse still uses/drinks.
The marriage is in shreds because your spouse has lied so much, all trust is gone.
As a believer what would you do with a spouse who is in the throws of addiction?



Try Al-Anon.


Great suggestion but is Al Anon run by people who would have the biblical answer to this? :smile:


Yes. Al Anon is a Church supported activity. Here is a list of examples.

http://www.ar.al-anon.alateen.org/alanonmeetings.htm

TMommy's photo
Sun 09/20/15 02:33 PM
depends on your definition of dependency
if you define alcoholism as a disease
then it would fall under til death due us part, for better or for worse, in sickness and in health

however, there is more to consider than just this spouse's substance abuse
for you must also consider the mental/emotional health of those around him or her..


here I know we have certified Christian counselors and I would encourage this person to talk to one and explore some options of what may be the best answer for them

no photo
Wed 09/23/15 04:32 AM
Seperation until the spouse sorts it out. If he does not, you are entitled to divorce him for neglect and abandonment. In the Torah divorce was permitted for neglect.
The lady above this post is correct that your mental health and any childrens are at stake.
Peace be with you.

joyfulsoundofpeace's photo
Sat 10/10/15 03:22 PM
I would recommend picking up the book Biblical Foundations of Freedom.

"Our battle is not against flesh and blood but against principalities, powers, princes, and rulers of darkness" Ephesians 6:11
The enemy(satan) wants to lie, kill, and destroy. He will do everything to speak lies to you, kill your joy and peace, and destroy relationships.
It's time to get in the war room and do spiritual warfare. Make sure you declare and out your armor on every day! Christians aren't doing this and in the spiritual realm they see Christians running around naked on the battlefield.

A lot of our battles, such as this one mentioned comes from some form of brokenness in the heart or mind. I have been through deliverance and inner healing and have sat in on things and have seen God do miraculous works.
Principalities- come in a form of unforgiveness, rejection, fear, doubt, the occult, bitterness, etc. these strongholds actually can cause diseases and disorders. It just all goes back to the basics of confessing our sins- which could include the negative emotions we go into, asking for repentance and asking for forgiveness. Then asking the Lord to cancel Satan's authority over you in that issue.

Also I have been around people who are demon possessed, even Christians who had open doors such as drugs and alcohol. Every time you sin you are opening a door to the enemy and giving them legal right to be in your body.

missionary57's photo
Sat 10/10/15 04:11 PM
:angel: Great answer!.

We cannot look at the person's physical problem alone because this is also a spiritual problem.

Time to tell the devil to back off!!

She should not do it alone either. It's ok to ask for help. Get a pray team together and begin to intercede for his freedom.