Community > Posts By > mykeymyx

 
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Sun 08/24/08 09:46 PM
Damn .. I`m not sure how this damn game works.

mykeymyx's photo
Sun 08/24/08 09:40 PM
titilating

mykeymyx's photo
Sun 08/24/08 09:19 PM
I'm sitting in my room, when my mom and my dad came in. they pulled up a chair and they sat down. They go “mike, we need to talk to you.” And I go “ok, whats the matter?” They go “me and your mom, we've noticed that lately you've been having a lot of problems, and you've been going off for no reason, and we're afraid you're going to hurt somebody, and we're afraid you're going to hurt yourself. So we decided that it would be in you're best interest if we put you somewhere where you could get the help that you need.” And I go “wait, what are you talking about, WE decided? MY best interests? How do you know what MY best interest is? How can you say what MY best interest is? What are you trying to say? I'M crazy? When I went to YOU'RE schools, I went to YOU'RE churches, I went to YOU'RE institutional learning facilities. So how can you say I'M crazy?”


Suicidal Tendencies

mykeymyx's photo
Sun 08/24/08 08:47 PM
Rehab Sittin at a bar

mykeymyx's photo
Sun 08/24/08 08:43 PM
pondering

mykeymyx's photo
Sun 08/24/08 07:38 PM
HasidicEnforcer gets a gold

mykeymyx's photo
Sun 08/24/08 07:28 PM
Against me Thrash unreal

mykeymyx's photo
Sun 08/24/08 07:19 PM


I'm too friggin tired to go out and get some, but I'm desperately in need.


I remember saying that once & it wasn`t about Dorritos ...

mykeymyx's photo
Sun 08/24/08 06:43 PM
I noticed that ... so i went out to the trees ... & as you can see there`s not always women around ... sometimes it`s just trees when you go there

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Sun 08/24/08 01:01 AM
"I'm sorry, sir, but you'll have to stand in line for that, too."


"I'm sorry, sir, but not only is that prohibited by my employer. you seem as incapable of that as getting on the flight you want. Please find the end of the line as i`m sure you are familiar with being that low of a priority. "

mykeymyx's photo
Sun 08/24/08 12:51 AM
I always know someone isn`t gonna be into me when her mom likes me

mykeymyx's photo
Sun 08/24/08 12:48 AM
Viens a moi, ladies, means 'come to me' in French.’
Nancy takes another sniff, then offers her arm to Kathy again, and remarks,
‘That doesn't smell like come to me. Does that smell like come to you?


i`m not sure who`d wanna wear Viens a moi

mykeymyx's photo
Sun 08/24/08 12:18 AM
lesbian went over~board with @nal? ..

Staysasauras

mykeymyx's photo
Sun 08/24/08 12:16 AM
Edited by mykeymyx on Sun 08/24/08 12:17 AM
why are lesbians so thin? ..

they don`t eat d!ck

mykeymyx's photo
Sun 08/24/08 12:14 AM
Edited by mykeymyx on Sun 08/24/08 12:15 AM
lesbophobic men ask why dykes use dildos, when such a toy is shaped like the organ they chose to avoid ... a wise stand up comedian once said,"they made their choice!"

mykeymyx's photo
Sun 08/24/08 12:05 AM
well have u ever tried to suck ur own tit? about impossible.


i know i can`t ... but some of the girls i know can ... & it`s almost as much fun to watch as it is to do ... ALMOST ... :S

mykeymyx's photo
Sun 08/24/08 12:01 AM
After a stunned silence, the whole class burst out laughing. The poor
girl's face turned bright red, and as she realized exactly what she had
inadvertently said (or rather implied)


the best stories involve this sort of moment

mykeymyx's photo
Sat 08/23/08 11:19 PM
2. AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH THE FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT BY USING THE SINK.


.. she was in the shower gettin ready for work ... good thing you can adjust the "flush" on a sink so teh water temp don`t change.

5. IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL BE AFRAID TO COUGH.


in the event of no laxatives : substitute your evening meal with a bottle of whiskey ... you`ll have a new problem in the morning ")

mykeymyx's photo
Sat 08/23/08 11:00 PM
Edited by mykeymyx on Sat 08/23/08 11:05 PM
Grandma used to set her hot baked apple pies on the window sill to cool -Her
granddaughters set theirs on the window sill to thaw.


I was havin a convo with this tight lil 19-21yr old at work today ... & when i realized besides being smart, sexy, calm under pressure, she had the ability to pull some sense out of the jibberish i was spewing ... since it was the workplace I didn`t say why i was asking ... but I asked if she liked to cook. so she mentioned it`s a means to an end... I understand that theory but i wonder why cooking has become such a rare talent .. i`m almost thinking it`s a new strategy in the gender rights movement ... "Create a generation of women that can`t cook, but can bring in an income to pay people to prepare food. Not only are you making a striking blow to the previously stereotypical male who posesses the same lack of culinary tallent +PLUS+ you have a 50-50 chance of dominating a man to serve her a (hopefully tasty) meal. beware useless males ... your moms apron strings are being tied into your noose :0

mykeymyx's photo
Sat 08/23/08 10:44 PM
Well I was just remembering a limmerick.

There once was a woman who was quite begat. She had three babies named Nat, Pat, and Tat. She said it was fun in the breeding, but found it was hell in the feeding when she saw there was no tit for Tat.

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