Community > Posts By > barney2

 
barney2's photo
Fri 01/12/07 06:43 PM
Now I am beginning to understand, why they call a "whore house" a fish
market !

barney2's photo
Fri 01/12/07 06:41 PM
Absolutely marvellous....

Don't just join up a forum just because you have to, or you are coaxed
into it by circumstances or you are searchin for somethin

If need be, just borrow any discussion you liked, and a discussion you
hated and list it in any other forum [in your own way] and you would get
a much more clearer view of things... This ofcourse is only for those
guys who are one of those searchin for another half, or game/ control
junkies

Just enjoy yourself and leave..... that's it... and let the rest take
its course.

barney2's photo
Fri 01/12/07 06:24 PM
Basically, no women driver would ever give up that stick.. besides they
handle it better than any man..

and any man driver would only oblige giving his gear-stick to any
woman..

Hate these automatic come-ons. Its one pull and that's the end ot it !!

barney2's photo
Fri 01/12/07 06:20 PM
Funny, when a chick says that.....

Wishing there were more hot chicks like these.... the studs would never
be idle...

Bless these grand canyons

barney2's photo
Fri 01/12/07 07:45 AM
All it takes is right positioning, a good cameraman and a quite
incredible theme, and you can make anyone a hunk or a hottie [not that
the picture suggests that... it is the imagination]

Ofcourse most of you know that the stretch is to reduce the fat and
wrinkles, and at the same time balance the theme.....for the bottle
below...

So that's all to it.....

The rest is imagination

barney2's photo
Fri 01/12/07 05:50 AM
That was nice..... but it may not go well with some of themm

Nonetheless, just check these out.......

What's the definition of confusion?
Twenty blind lesbians in a fish market.

What do you call an open can of tuna on a lesbians coffee table??
Potpourri

Well.... if not for the lesbians, how else can we make them laugh and
still not feel bad !

barney2's photo
Thu 01/11/07 07:31 PM

OOOOOOOOOOPS.............

The title should be ...

100 Reason's Why It's Great To Be A "MAN"


Well.....why worry...... make that the [101st reason !!]

Ta da

barney2's photo
Thu 01/11/07 07:26 PM
1. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

2. Movie nudity is virtually always female.

3. You know stuff about cars.

4. A five day vacation requires only one suitcase.

5. Monday Night Football.

6. You don't have to monitor your friends sex lives.

7. Your bathroom lines are 80% shorter.

8. You can open all your own jars.

9. Old friends don't give you crap if you've lost or gained weight.

10. Dry cleaners and haircutter's don't rob you blind.

11. When clicking through the channel, you don't have to stall on every
shot of someone crying.

12. Your ass is never a factor in a job interview.

13. All your orgasms are real.

14. A beer gut does not make you invisible to the opposite sex.

15. Guys in hockey masks don't attack you.

16. You don't have to lug a bag of useful stuff around everywhere you
go.

17. You understand why Stripes is funny.

18. You can go to the bathroom with out a support group.

19. Your last name stays put.

20. You can leave a hotel bed unmade.

21. When your work is criticized, you don't have to panic that everyone
secretly hates you.

22. You can kill your own food.

23. The garage is all yours.

24. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

25. You see the humor in Terms of Endearment.

26. Nobody secretly wonders if you swallow.

27. You never have to clean the toilet.

28. You can be showered and ready in 10 minutes.

29. Sex means never worrying about your reputation.

30. Wedding plans take care of themselves.

31. If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still
be your friend.

32. Your underwear is $10 for a three pack.

33. The National College Cheerleading Championship

34. None of your co-workers have the power to make you cry.

35. You don't have to shave below your neck.

36. You don't have to curl up next to a hairy ass every nite.

37. If you're 40 and single nobody notices.

38. You can write your name in the snow.

39. You can get into a nontrivial pissing contest.

40. Everything on your face stays its original color.

41. Chocolate is just another snack.

42. You can be president.

43. You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger seat.

44. Flowers fix everything.

45. You never have to worry about other people's feelings.

46. You get to think about sex 90% of your waking hours.

47. You can wear a white shirt to a water park.

48. Three pair of shoes are more than enough.

49. You can eat a banana in a hardware store.

50. You can say anything and not worry about what people think.

51. Foreplay is optional.

52. Michael Bolton doesn't live in your universe.

53. Nobody stops telling a good dirty joke when you walk into the room.

54. You can whip your shirt off on a hot day.

55. You don't have to clean your apartment if the meter reader is coming
by.

56. You never feel compelled to stop a pal from getting laid.

57. Car mechanics tell you the truth.

58. You don't give a rat's ass if someone notices your new haircut.

59. You can watch a game in silence with you buddy for hours without
even thinking (He must be mad at me)

60. The world is your urinal.

61. You never misconstrue innocuous statements to mean your lover is
about to leave you.

62. You get to jump up and slap stuff.

63. Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.

64. One mood, all the time.

65. You can admire Clint Eastwood without starving yourself to look like
him.

66. You never have to drive to another gas station because this one's
just too yucky.

67. You know at least 20 ways to open a beer bottle.

68. You can sit with your knees apart no matter what you are wearing.

69. Same work....more pay.

70. Gray hair and wrinkles add character.

71. You don't have to leave the room to make emergency crotch
adjustments.

72. Wedding Dress $2000; Tux rental $100.

73. You don't care if someone is talking about you behind your back.

74. With 400 million sperm per shot, you could double the earth's
population in 15 tries, at least in theory.

75. You don't mooch off others' desserts.

76. If you retain water, it's in a canteen.

77. The remote is yours and yours alone.

78. People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them.

79. ESPN's sports center.

80. You can drop by to see a friend without bringing a little gift.

81. Bachelor parties whip ass over bridal showers.

82. You have a normal and healthy relationship with your mother.

83. You can buy condoms without the shopkeeper imagining you naked.

84. You needn't pretend you're "freshening up" to go to the bathroom.

85. If you don't call your buddy when you say you will, he won't tell
your friends you've changed.

86. Someday you'll be a dirty old man.

87. You can rationalize any behavior with the handy phrase "F_ck it!"

88. If an other guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you might
become lifelong buddies.

89. Princess Di's death was almost just another obituary.

90. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.

91. You never have to miss a sexual opportunity because you're not in
the mood.

92. You think the idea of punting a small dog is funny.

93. If something mechanical didn't work, you can bash it with a hammer
and throw it across the room.

94. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

95. Porn movies are designed with your mind in mind.

96. You don't have to remember everyone's birthdays and anniversaries.

97. Not liking a person does not preclude having great sex with them.

98. Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with: "So, notice
anything different?"

99. Baywatch

100. There is always a game on somewhere





PS..... [Please don't take this personally].....

barney2's photo
Thu 01/11/07 07:22 PM

1.Free drinks.

2.Free dinners.

3.Free movies (you get the point).

4.You can hug your friend without wondering if she thinks you're gay.

5.You can hug your friend without wondering if YOU'RE gay.

6.You know The Truth about whether size matters.

7.Speeding ticket? What's that?

8.New lipstick gives you a whole new lease on life.

9.You never had to walk down the hall with your binder strategically
positioned in high school.

10.If you have sex with someone and don't call them the next day, you're
not the devil.

11.Condoms make no significant difference in your enjoyment of sex.

12.If you have to be home in time for Melrose Place, you can say so, out
loud.

13.It's possible to live your whole life without ever taking a group
shower.

14.Brad Pitt.

15.You don't have to fart to amuse yourself.

16.If you cheat on your spouse, people assume it's because you're being
emotionally neglected.

17.You'll never have to decide where to hide your nose-hair clipper.

18.No one passes out when you take off your shoes.

19.If you forget to shave, no one has to know.

20.You can congratulate your teammate without ever touching her butt.

21.If you have a zit, you can conceal it.

22.You never have to reach down every so often to make sure your
privates are still there.

23.If you're dumb, some people will find it cute.

24.You don't have to memorize Caddyshack or Fletch to fit in.

25.You have the ability to dress yourself.

26.You have an excuse to be a total ***** at least once a month.

27.You can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture
them naked.

28.If you're wearing cologne, you don't have to pretend it's aftershave.

29.You'll probably never see someone you know while peeing in an alley.

30.You'll never have to punch a hole through anything with your fist.

31.You can quickly end any fight by crying.

32.There are times when chocolate really Can solve all your problems.

33.You've never had a goatee.

34.Gay waiters don't make you uncomfortable.

35.You'll never regret piercing your ears.

36.You can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.

37.You don't have hair on your back.

38.You know which glass was yours by the lipstick mark.

barney2's photo
Thu 01/11/07 05:37 AM
Marvellous !

Dogs seem to have all the fun..

So what do the other dogs do now ?

They look at each other .... a'right if that's what you want..... So
they remove their cameras and say to each other

before v liver .... just ask her to say "cheese" so that we can tell
other we "shot" her !



barney2's photo
Wed 01/10/07 09:40 AM
Mighty funny pardner....

barney2's photo
Sun 01/07/07 10:04 PM


Doc: Name ???
Patient: Abu Dalah Sarafi
Doc: Sex ?
Patient: Four times a week
Doc: No, no, no male or female ?
Patient : Male, Female... sometimes camel...

barney2's photo
Sun 01/07/07 10:02 PM
That was fantastic.....

Allow me to put in my two cents worth....

A 93 year old woman decided that she'd seen and done everything, and the
time had come to depart from this world.

After considering various methods of doing away with herself, she came
to the conclusion that the quickest and surest way method would be to
shoot herself through the heart.

The trouble was, she was uncertain about exactly where her heart was, so
she phoned her doctor and asked him. He told her that her heart was
located two inches below her left nipple.

So she shot herself in the left kneecap.


Once again, the stroke bit was just too good.....ha !

barney2's photo
Sun 01/07/07 09:55 PM
In the beginning, God created the Earth and rested.

Then God created Man and rested.

Then God created Woman.


Since then, neither God, nor Man has rested.
(The only reason why man has not rested is because, he has yet to prove
himself to the woman.)

There you go! Right back at ya!


PS.. You have to solve the problem !! [no offense]

barney2's photo
Sat 01/06/07 11:19 PM
Come on guys.....

Blondes ain't all below.... they have left some at the top as well...

Just that most of us .... can't distinguish the difference between the
lips !!

barney2's photo
Sat 01/06/07 11:17 PM
Hi

Have a free trampoline..... wanna try it ??

Kiddin

Welcome

barney2's photo
Sat 01/06/07 11:15 PM
Welcome aboard...

As a newbie.... i heard that if you are from canada... they provide you
with a free mount.. as long you are the horse dude..

Check it out.....

barney2's photo
Sat 01/06/07 11:13 PM
Dude...... your thread gotta run like..... just searchin for that one,
so that the right one may not find out....

Well.... better get searchin dude

barney2's photo
Sat 01/06/07 11:12 PM
Hi dude...... welcome to the garden of eden .......


PS. You reply to this.. you get an apple for free !!!

barney2's photo
Sat 01/06/07 11:10 PM
It takes some to assess the mood, mind set and the usual games present
in any place..... So apologies for not replyin earlier

Once again, thanks for the great welcome....


PS...

Regardin the photo.... shall send anyone who needs a copy !!!!
And as advised, have taken it off and put the real thing instead !