I cannot be ready for a friend then I suppose. Curious..are you a qualified Psychiatrist?

but let me ask you a question; What would lead me to believe getting in a relationship of any sort other than professional with a separated women would lead to long term? Cause if she can just throw away a period of her life like nothing ever happened and blame it all on the other person not taking any ownership or time to reflect. In my mind it will only be a matter of time before I am the next statistic on her list.

I can easily throw away an abusive alchoholic who I lived with for 15yrs and tried everyway to make it work. I was only allowed to go to work then from work to home-period. My pay check was taken from me and not to mention all my friends. My children were not even allowed to visit me in my own home. So YES it was neccessary for me to walk away. I have reflected too many years that I have wasted on a man a never saw sober 1 day in 15yrs. Now that I am starting a new life, I have my friends...I have found who I am, and I like the new me. Should I explain more??

I don't think anyone was asking you to give details. Each person has ownership to what went wrong. I think Caam was stating the hypothetical male side. You seem a bit defensive. I'm sorry you do not like our answers.

One of my two hard and fast rules about dating is making sure the ink is dry. This was not an arbitrary decision. It was based on observation and experience. It is a difficult topic to explain briefly, but here I go

There is ALWAYS, in my experience, too much baggage, too much bitterness, and too close a connection for my comfort level.

Because and ill put it this way. Men/Women are not always honest with themselves and drag that person through hell because that don't know what they want. ill say it's most likely 95% that most people that are getting a divorce are not ready to let there other half go.

Details were necessary, when someone would assume you are throwing away any part of your life. Anyone -- would be defensive if they thought you or anyone else was "throwing away" a part of your life..when it is aways going to be a part no matter what. Sorry it seems we have gotten alittle off track here. This was not a question of whos to blame or not to blame and where it went wrong....I just wanted to know why SOME men don't want to go out with women who are separted and vice vera. That was the question to begin with.. I got my answers. Thank you all.

here was the origanal question.

I apologize if you took this personal. by no means was I condeming or condoning I was trying to give you some perspective on how I think

No need to apologize. Thanks