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Topic: Funny insults
Dan99 Joined Sat 08/23/08 Posts: 14941	Thu 04/30/09 06:49 PM
Got any? I need some quick, funny one-liners. I need them for my best man speech, but you can contribute any even if they wouldnt be suitable for that. Here are a few which im considering using.. - He has got the face of a saint. A Saint Bernard. - Thats what they mean when they use the phrase 'dark and handsome' about him. When its dark, he's handsome. - He loves nature, despite what it did to him - I have seen more life in a down and outs vest

Beachfarmer Joined Tue 04/17/07 Posts: 24661	Thu 04/30/09 06:50 PM
Seen more personality in speed bump ran over by a Ford Pinto with no engine.

moofooga Joined Thu 01/31/08 Posts: 25515	Thu 04/30/09 06:51 PM
- Yo' mama's like a bus... people be gittin' on and offa her all day! - Yo' mama's so fat... everytime she wears orange, she looks like a cheeseburger!

Beachfarmer Joined Tue 04/17/07 Posts: 24661	Thu 04/30/09 06:53 PM
I'll bet you can really roll with things....and I'll bet the rectal cranial inversion helps.

MAKE_ME_GIGGLE Joined Thu 02/07/08 Posts: 5376	Thu 04/30/09 06:57 PM
If I wanted to hear from an A$$hole, I'd fart!!!

Beachfarmer Joined Tue 04/17/07 Posts: 24661	Thu 04/30/09 06:58 PM
You should invest in a headband to keep the foreskin out of your eyes.

MAKE_ME_GIGGLE Joined Thu 02/07/08 Posts: 5376	Thu 04/30/09 06:58 PM
You should invest in a headband to keep the foreskin out of your eyes. LOL thats funny right there!!

LordCole Joined Tue 03/31/09 Posts: 735	Thu 04/30/09 06:58 PM Edited by LordCole on Thu 04/30/09 07:00 PM
To any thing he says to you say back: Nuh uh... Your a doody head!

darkowl1 Joined Sat 01/12/08 Posts: 13060	Thu 04/30/09 07:00 PM
I-I-II-I...I-II-I'M T-TOO DUMB TOO DOO THIS......

Poetrywriter Joined Sun 10/14/07 Posts: 22675	Thu 04/30/09 07:01 PM
Well, well, all dressed up and no face to go!

darkowl1 Joined Sat 01/12/08 Posts: 13060	Thu 04/30/09 07:01 PM
You should invest in a headband to keep the foreskin out of your eyes. VERRY FUNNY!!!

Dan99 Joined Sat 08/23/08 Posts: 14941	Thu 04/30/09 07:03 PM
Good stuff, keep 'em coming folks!

Beachfarmer Joined Tue 04/17/07 Posts: 24661	Thu 04/30/09 07:04 PM
You should invest in a headband to keep the foreskin out of your eyes. VERRY FUNNY!!! Suddenly lost my desire to insult... HEYA BRO! Thanks MMGiggle! Now back to our regularly scheduled Scathery

quiet_2008 Joined Sat 08/30/08 Posts: 11138	Thu 04/30/09 07:05 PM
you look like your face caught on fire and someone put it out with a wet chain

robert1652 Joined Wed 11/14/07 Posts: 8447	Thu 04/30/09 07:08 PM
once someone who actually had a beard and a mustache annoyed me so much that I said "I bet your face bleeds every month" another time an employee who was consistently late to report to work in reply to his good morning I said "Too early for tomorrow" in another occasion to a heckler with a large nose while I was on stage I said " Do you have a twin brother? cause you pair will make a nice pick axe side by side" I think that is enough for now

darkowl1 Joined Sat 01/12/08 Posts: 13060	Thu 04/30/09 07:08 PM
can i pull your teeth out? your face will look softer.... hey beach! doin ok? i know ya miss cali....i miss it and i don't live there, lol.

Poetrywriter Joined Sun 10/14/07 Posts: 22675	Thu 04/30/09 07:08 PM
I picked up that book that you wanted me to get for you, you know the "Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Sex But Were Afraid To Ask" book?

darkowl1 Joined Sat 01/12/08 Posts: 13060	Thu 04/30/09 07:13 PM
well, there's always this............dammit! you stupid sh!t!!!!! NOW LOOK WHAT YOU DID!!!!! AND COVERING IT UP!!!! DO YOU THINK I WAS BORN NEXT MONTH??!!!???!!!

Beachfarmer Joined Tue 04/17/07 Posts: 24661	Thu 04/30/09 07:16 PM
and one from the master Thou sham'st the music of sweet news By playing it to me with so sour a face. W.S.

DTHRomeo Joined Wed 06/20/07 Posts: 43387	Thu 04/30/09 07:26 PM
So what's your problem ... besides your face?