Lately, I’ve been in a strange mood and have even whined about it to a few people. I know part of it has to do with confusion over some new emotions I don’t know how to deal with, but there’s also been this underlying thing that I just couldn’t seem to put my finger on.

I think I’ve finally figured it out. Music is sort of a therapy for me and I am known to listen to a song over and over for hours on end until I feel the message has sunk in. I listen to songs as reinforcement for how I feel about things (Eaten By the Monster of Love by The Sparks as a reminder of what to avoid), for a positive outlook (All Fired Up by Pat Benetar as a reminder things happen for a reason and for the best), etc. as well as the usual reasons (need good cleaning music, need to just cry it out, want to dance my tushy off, etc.). Sometimes, though, I’ll find myself listening to something repeatedly without consciously choosing it.

Anyway, for the past week I’ve been so preoccupied with trying to figure out the other “thing” that I hadn’t paid much attention to what I’ve been listening to. That changed when my sister said, “For crying out loud, just go find someone!” I had no idea what she was talking about until she pointed out that she was ready to slit my wrists for me if I didn’t “stop playing that damned song”.

Here’s the kicker… I am surrounded by people at work, I go hang out with different friends almost daily, and I talk to a few people fairly regularly on here. But I guess I’m still lonely. Go figure! I always say I feel alone around most people because most people I know view things so different from me, but I’ve never really felt ‘lonely’ before.

Has anyone else gone through this? How do you make it go away?

I’m out for the evening, but considering how people have responded to the other two times I whined about something on here, I’m guessing that by the time I come back on again this one will have some responses as well. Most likely, most will be sarcastic and funny, but I’m hoping for some helpful advice.

Oh, by the way, the song I’ve been wearing out is “I’m With You”. It's not one of my favorites and I actually didn't care for it the first time I heard it. I guess you never know what your subconscious will choose.

I’m With You - Avril Lavigne

I’m standing on the bridge
I’m waiting in the dark
I thought that you’d be here by now
There’s nothing but the rain
No footsteps on the ground
I’m listening, but there’s no sound

CHORUS:
Isn’t anyone trying to find me?
Won’t somebody come take me home
It’s a damn cold night
Trying figure out this life
Wont you, take me by the hand, take me somewhere new
I don’t know who you are but I, I’m with you
I’m with you

I’m looking for a place
I’m searching for a face
Is anybody here I know
‘Cause nothing’s going right and
Everything’s a mess
And no one likes to be alone

(Repeat CHORUS)

Oh, why is everything so confusing
Maybe I’m just out of my mind
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah
Yeah

It’s a damn cold night
Trying to figure out this life
Won’t you, take me by the hand, take me somewhere new
I don’t know who you are but I, I’m with you
I’m with you

Take me by the hand, take me somewhere new
I don’t know who you are but I, I’m with you
I’m with you

Take me by the hand, take me somewhere new
I don’t know who you are but I, I’m with you
I’m with you
I’m with you.

everyone feels that way at one time or another. I actually feel good lately. I have a great family (except the step dad....that's a whole jerry springer show) and great friends.

Yes. I've basically been going through the exact same thing since last August.



I haven't got the vaguest hint of a trace of an inkling of a clue. I suspect it's permanent.

i can honestly say i don't get lonely

You need a date, a partner, not more friends.

your profile says you are looking for activity partners and I've read your previous saying, that how you are looking for someone to go hiking, play sports etc.
That's what friends for, and if you think you got enough friends and still feel lonely, you need to find that particular person who will be with you, even when the friends go home.

I don't know. Isn't that kind of like saying you're not happy and expecting that all to change when you start dating someone?

Take the time to get to know yourself and you will never be lonely because you will always be with your best friend.

good advice. I used to think someone had to make me happy (when I was younger) but I learned to be happy with myself...I even argue with myself too

dis appear go somewhere new away from everyone you have sent most of your time with

i think if ya got money they call it a sabbatical

if ya can do it for a month or too you will reboot you brian and things will not look so gloomy

at least it worked for me

who's brian????

Yes I'm lonely

and Yes - I love that song!

i am not sure honestly

dr stien, frank n, dug it up somewhere

he really is a great surgeon

i was lonlier in my marriage than i ever could be now.

Tried that -- I've basically been in seclusion since the car accident in Feb. -- and while it's true I've managed to avoid having to deal with most of the people I knew from "before," nothing has really improved at all.

She says, she got friends and surrounded by people and go out having fun with them. Obviously, that's not enough after a while if she still feels lonely.

Yes I agree, we tend to forget that in our previous marriage we were lonelier than ever! So if that is the case than marriage not the answer? So what do we need to do to prevent that from happening again because being single can be the same way! sooo

thru my experiences with age aha

I have been married once
lived with partner and not married
thought I found my soul mate

back to being single again

only this time I am more independent, confident and free to travel places I never thought of doing before

so it does get better

but the question still is , where do we look for that one person to spend the rest of your life with that our forefathers were so successfull at doing? Please tell me!

i'm sooo sorry.

It might be depression, you might want to look into
counseling if it keeps up. Usually getting out with friends
or family will stop the loneliness. Sometimes we have to learn how
to live with ourselves, rather than hoping someone else will
make it better for us. Hope you feel better soon. It is normal
for all of us to get lonely once and awhile. Guess its a
matter of how we handle that loneliness that is important.
I have been single a really long time, and had to learn to
enjoy myself for me. When I waited for someone to come into
my life to correct that loneliness- I was miserable.
I have since learned to enjoy myself, even when I feel lonely.
When and if someone else comes into my life, will just be an
extra bonus when the time comes.
(((Hug)))