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| Topic: values anyone? | |
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OK seriously though, why is it that people who do not drink or smoke put themselves up on a moral pedestal?.... maybe that's why you're alone.
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I have noticed that i am alone because i have morals and values that other ppl have lost over the years. For example, i dont drink, or smoke pot, or do drugs of any kind, and i expect that of anyone i bring into my life (and my daughters life as well). Is anyone else facing this issue? It is not fun. I deal with it everywere I go, including Church and Family. My Sister has been wanting me to drink at least one beer. A friend of mine said he wished he was in my shoes, and I could not figure that one out. I am in the same boat, Its like life aint hard enough, but friends and family feel the need to pressure us as well.. |
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OK seriously though, why is it that people who do not drink or smoke put themselves up on a moral pedestal?.... maybe that's why you're alone. I dont feel its a moral pedestal.. just because we are a minority in todays society and we are just trying to find like minded ppl to include in our lives.. i dont have anything against you for drinking or doin drugs.. i just know its not for me, and its not to be around my kid.. beleive me in most ppls eyes i am a fuddy duddy and a goody too shoes.. and thats not even the case.. i am as crazy as anyone else.. but i just dont need alcohol or drugs to get me there. |
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OK seriously though, why is it that people who do not drink or smoke put themselves up on a moral pedestal?.... maybe that's why you're alone. I dont feel its a moral pedestal.. just because we are a minority in todays society and we are just trying to find like minded ppl to include in our lives.. i dont have anything against you for drinking or doin drugs.. i just know its not for me, and its not to be around my kid.. beleive me in most ppls eyes i am a fuddy duddy and a goody too shoes.. and thats not even the case.. i am as crazy as anyone else.. but i just dont need alcohol or drugs to get me there. lol, are u sure you arent my twin,, ditto |
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OK seriously though, why is it that people who do not drink or smoke put themselves up on a moral pedestal?.... maybe that's why you're alone. I personally don't like to use the term "morals" here, because of the religious overtones. But I don't drink or smoke and I have never seen myself as being on a "pedestal" for that (for other reasons, certainly, but not for that). It's really very simple -- when you've seen as many people kill themselves via drugs and alcohol as I have, you understand that it's simply not a good idea to get too attached to people who willfully engage in self-destructive behaviors of that sort. Call it a defense mechanism, if you like. It isn't pedestal-based; it's really no different from my choosing not to get involved with someone who enjoys sky-diving without a parachute. The long-term prognosis for that relationship is not very bright, and one learns (hopefully) which behaviors to avoid -- and that means avoiding the people who engage in those behaviors. |
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OK seriously though, why is it that people who do not drink or smoke put themselves up on a moral pedestal?.... maybe that's why you're alone. I dont feel its a moral pedestal.. just because we are a minority in todays society and we are just trying to find like minded ppl to include in our lives.. i dont have anything against you for drinking or doin drugs.. i just know its not for me, and its not to be around my kid.. beleive me in most ppls eyes i am a fuddy duddy and a goody too shoes.. and thats not even the case.. i am as crazy as anyone else.. but i just dont need alcohol or drugs to get me there. I respect that, my brother is the same way.... high on life as I like to call it. Sometimes people who are overly one way like straight laced or religious can come across as thinking they are better than others. Those are the people I can't handle.... live and let live. Drugs are a completely different beast but alcohol and cigs are legal . |
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OK seriously though, why is it that people who do not drink or smoke put themselves up on a moral pedestal?.... maybe that's why you're alone. I personally don't like to use the term "morals" here, because of the religious overtones. But I don't drink or smoke and I have never seen myself as being on a "pedestal" for that (for other reasons, certainly, but not for that). It's really very simple -- when you've seen as many people kill themselves via drugs and alcohol as I have, you understand that it's simply not a good idea to get too attached to people who willfully engage in self-destructive behaviors of that sort. Call it a defense mechanism, if you like. It isn't pedestal-based; it's really no different from my choosing not to get involved with someone who enjoys sky-diving without a parachute. The long-term prognosis for that relationship is not very bright, and one learns (hopefully) which behaviors to avoid -- and that means avoiding the people who engage in those behaviors. I understand that as well, my father drank himself to death but I don 't see that as a sign for me to never have a drink. He made his choices and I will make mine; I will certainly never end up like him. |
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Edited by
Unknow
on
Tue 07/06/10 05:43 PM
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OK seriously though, why is it that people who do not drink or smoke put themselves up on a moral pedestal?.... maybe that's why you're alone. I personally don't like to use the term "morals" here, because of the religious overtones. But I don't drink or smoke and I have never seen myself as being on a "pedestal" for that (for other reasons, certainly, but not for that). It's really very simple -- when you've seen as many people kill themselves via drugs and alcohol as I have, you understand that it's simply not a good idea to get too attached to people who willfully engage in self-destructive behaviors of that sort. Call it a defense mechanism, if you like. It isn't pedestal-based; it's really no different from my choosing not to get involved with someone who enjoys sky-diving without a parachute. The long-term prognosis for that relationship is not very bright, and one learns (hopefully) which behaviors to avoid -- and that means avoiding the people who engage in those behaviors. I understand that as well, my father drank himself to death but I don 't see that as a sign for me to never have a drink. He made his choices and I will make mine; I will certainly never end up like him. I had a friend who said almost those same exact words 35 years ago. He died last year. He bled out from the liver. |
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OK seriously though, why is it that people who do not drink or smoke put themselves up on a moral pedestal?.... maybe that's why you're alone. I personally don't like to use the term "morals" here, because of the religious overtones. But I don't drink or smoke and I have never seen myself as being on a "pedestal" for that (for other reasons, certainly, but not for that). It's really very simple -- when you've seen as many people kill themselves via drugs and alcohol as I have, you understand that it's simply not a good idea to get too attached to people who willfully engage in self-destructive behaviors of that sort. Call it a defense mechanism, if you like. It isn't pedestal-based; it's really no different from my choosing not to get involved with someone who enjoys sky-diving without a parachute. The long-term prognosis for that relationship is not very bright, and one learns (hopefully) which behaviors to avoid -- and that means avoiding the people who engage in those behaviors. Thank you, you said that perfectly.. I dont see the need in persuing a relationship with an expiration date on it |
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Edited by
msmyka
on
Tue 07/06/10 05:45 PM
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OK seriously though, why is it that people who do not drink or smoke put themselves up on a moral pedestal?.... maybe that's why you're alone. I personally don't like to use the term "morals" here, because of the religious overtones. But I don't drink or smoke and I have never seen myself as being on a "pedestal" for that (for other reasons, certainly, but not for that). It's really very simple -- when you've seen as many people kill themselves via drugs and alcohol as I have, you understand that it's simply not a good idea to get too attached to people who willfully engage in self-destructive behaviors of that sort. Call it a defense mechanism, if you like. It isn't pedestal-based; it's really no different from my choosing not to get involved with someone who enjoys sky-diving without a parachute. The long-term prognosis for that relationship is not very bright, and one learns (hopefully) which behaviors to avoid -- and that means avoiding the people who engage in those behaviors. I understand that as well, my father drank himself to death but I don 't see that as a sign for me to never have a drink. He made his choices and I will make mine; I will certainly never end up like him. I had a friend who said almost those same exact words 35 years ago. He died last year. He bled out from the liver. Not sure what kind of response you expected to incite from me but sorry about your friend. |
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OK seriously though, why is it that people who do not drink or smoke put themselves up on a moral pedestal?.... maybe that's why you're alone. I personally don't like to use the term "morals" here, because of the religious overtones. But I don't drink or smoke and I have never seen myself as being on a "pedestal" for that (for other reasons, certainly, but not for that). It's really very simple -- when you've seen as many people kill themselves via drugs and alcohol as I have, you understand that it's simply not a good idea to get too attached to people who willfully engage in self-destructive behaviors of that sort. Call it a defense mechanism, if you like. It isn't pedestal-based; it's really no different from my choosing not to get involved with someone who enjoys sky-diving without a parachute. The long-term prognosis for that relationship is not very bright, and one learns (hopefully) which behaviors to avoid -- and that means avoiding the people who engage in those behaviors. I understand that as well, my father drank himself to death but I don 't see that as a sign for me to never have a drink. He made his choices and I will make mine; I will certainly never end up like him. I don't know your situation, so I can't comment on that, but most of the people I used to know, the ones I mentioned above -- the ones who killed themselves with alcohol -- said "I will never end up like [insert name of current or deceased alcoholic here]." The very assertion alone speaks volumes.... |
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Maybe it is standards.. but there is no one around me that shares the same views on life.. be it standards or values.. its kinda frustrating. It is rare to find a match in those areas. That is why we reach out to the Internet. |
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Once again sorry about your lost love ones but really I don't need lectures. I've been through it.
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OK seriously though, why is it that people who do not drink or smoke put themselves up on a moral pedestal?.... maybe that's why you're alone. I personally don't like to use the term "morals" here, because of the religious overtones. But I don't drink or smoke and I have never seen myself as being on a "pedestal" for that (for other reasons, certainly, but not for that). It's really very simple -- when you've seen as many people kill themselves via drugs and alcohol as I have, you understand that it's simply not a good idea to get too attached to people who willfully engage in self-destructive behaviors of that sort. Call it a defense mechanism, if you like. It isn't pedestal-based; it's really no different from my choosing not to get involved with someone who enjoys sky-diving without a parachute. The long-term prognosis for that relationship is not very bright, and one learns (hopefully) which behaviors to avoid -- and that means avoiding the people who engage in those behaviors. I understand that as well, my father drank himself to death but I don 't see that as a sign for me to never have a drink. He made his choices and I will make mine; I will certainly never end up like him. I had a friend who said almost those same exact words 35 years ago. He died last year. He bled out from the liver. Not sure what kind of response you expected to incite from me but sorry about your friend. I was not expecting any response. Your words struck me is all... Thanks for the sympathy. 
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I don't know your situation, so I can't comment on that, but most of the people I used to know, the ones I mentioned above -- the ones who killed themselves with alcohol -- said "I will never end up like [insert name of current or deceased alcoholic here]." The very assertion alone speaks volumes.... Pedestal |
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its not just ,,,hobbies, like drinking or whatever
I see a decline in things like self respect, respect of others, honesty, integrity, loyalty(but not blind loyalty), empathy, consideration, respect for authority or elders,,,,,etc,,etc,,, its just seems to be a growing one size fits all type of 'do and act however you want, as long as YOU are happy'....its like everything is self centered and nothing is about the UNIT anymore (the family unit, the neighborhood, the community,,,etc,,,) |
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its not just ,,,hobbies, like drinking or whatever I see a decline in things like self respect, respect of others, honesty, integrity, loyalty(but not blind loyalty), empathy, consideration, respect for authority or elders,,,,,etc,,etc,,, its just seems to be a growing one size fits all type of 'do and act however you want, as long as YOU are happy'....its like everything is self centered and nothing is about the UNIT anymore (the family unit, the neighborhood, the community,,,etc,,,) I agree, use to ppl actually spent time with there families without a holiday, and if someone needed something, it wasnt a "favor" to someone, it was just everyday life.. I realize those times are gone, but i am trying to teach my daughter how it was at least, so she can choose to keep some of those things alive in her life. |
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its not just ,,,hobbies, like drinking or whatever I see a decline in things like self respect, respect of others, honesty, integrity, loyalty(but not blind loyalty), empathy, consideration, respect for authority or elders,,,,,etc,,etc,,, its just seems to be a growing one size fits all type of 'do and act however you want, as long as YOU are happy'....its like everything is self centered and nothing is about the UNIT anymore (the family unit, the neighborhood, the community,,,etc,,,) I agree, use to ppl actually spent time with there families without a holiday, and if someone needed something, it wasnt a "favor" to someone, it was just everyday life.. I realize those times are gone, but i am trying to teach my daughter how it was at least, so she can choose to keep some of those things alive in her life. I have often thought about setting up a community if I got rich, where the like minded could raise old fashioned families again,,,just a fantasy,, but cool to think about |
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In my best Rodney Dangerfield!!!!
I get NO RESPECT!!!!!!!  THATS what its really ALL ABOUT.... The NEED for MORE,(DRUGS, BOOZE),in MOST,,,is because THEY HAVE LOST MUCH OF THEIR ""OWN"" RESPECT FOR THEM SELVES......  Its ALL in WHERE you look and with WHO your looking AT...?? And MORALS,,,truly are leaving the face of most people,,as we USE TO KNOW THEM,,to be.. |
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