For those of you who have lost somebody, whether it's a family member, friend, girlfriend, boyfriend, spouse, how long is considered "normal" for coping with loss?

you just have to cope one day at a time
and think of all the good memories that you had cherished
as for how long for you to cope with a loss well the love you have for that person is a lifetime but you also need to go forward
i have a uncle his wife died im thinking about 30yrs ago and he met his 2nd wife shortly she died last yr.. she claimed his children as her
i had a ex bf that died about 4yrs ago
i still talk to his family every now and then and i have a mp3 that he made for me and so when i want to here his voice i play the mp3
i know that he has been around me in spirit
the week that he had died i sware that i played that mp3 more than 50times

I don't think there is a "normal" period of time. It depends upon the relationship with that person. There are some losses that I have dealt with pretty well. My grandmother passed 25 years ago and I am still grieving.

my grandmother died 28yrs ago
she died 2weeks after i found out i was pg with my daughter
my daughter had her 2nd child 17yrs later that same time i had found out i was pg with my daughter and the same month that my grandmother had died

my grandma spirit is always in our home

when we almost lost my son 3yrs ago
he had a nde and he saw my grandmother and she told him to go back and live with your grandma

You should not worry about what is "normal." Don't try to live up to what others might expect of you.

I've seen people grieve for a spouse for an unreasonable time (5 years) not coping at all well with the loss.

I have a friend who accepted the loss quite quickly and going on with living her life, not wanting to waste a lot of time.

Time is all you have in this world, and it is limited. How you chose to spend it is your decision.

These responses make me feel better. A lot times I feel weird, thinking that I should have let things go a long time ago, other times I'm told that my loss is fairly recent.

Edit: To give this thread some context, today is the two year anniversary of my mom's death.

you know my grandmother birthday was april 11th
and i had thought a few days before wouldnt it had been cool
just to send a balloon with a red rose up in the sky to let her know we had been thinking of her
but we always do any how and she know that
my mom has a pic of my grandparents in her room
and there great memories

buy a balloon and a her fav flower and send it in the sky

I am very close to my mom and I care for her and my dad. Of all the people in my life today, my mom's death would probably hit me the hardest. But she is old and sometimes she talks like she thinks she should die. If I lost my sister that would be very very hard too. She lives next door and helps me with mom and dad.

I think you just have to accept what is and that there is nothing you can do about it but go on living. I'm sure that is what she would want you to do.

Awwwww...I am so sorry. Forever may not be long enough...never let anyone tell you that you should stop grieving...that belongs to you in your own way...in your own time.

I totally get that, and in a lot of ways I feel the same. At the same time, I dunno how long it is unreasonable to feel like this effects me.

That's everyone.

{quote]how long is considered "normal" for coping with loss?
It's life long.

I don't think there's a time limit on when to stop grieving. Taking it one day at a time, in baby steps, and just allow yourself to go through the motions.

It is never unreasonable to miss those that you love. It will have an effect on you for the rest of your life, but with each passing memory, comes a heart full of joy in knowing that you had them in your life and through love and remembrance, they remain with you....always. I try to remember that my grandmother would never leave me and although I can't see her...I know she is with me....as your mother is still with you. I hope that your heart heals and please know that we are all here for you if you need us.

I lost my son 3 weeks ago due to illness...It's the hardest thing in this world to live with..I have yet any "good" days..sometimes I feel as though I'll never get over it..Parents are suppose to outlive their chidren...it's been very difficult to say the least..The pain in unbearable....

wow im sorry
i almost lost my son 3yrs ago
he had been sick a week before xmas and shortly after my mom had taken hi to the doc where he was admited in the hospitol with phunmonia he was in pedicatrics and they rushed him into icu where he went into cardiac arrest they had 3 doc that had to revive him
not only did he have phumonia but issue with his lungs heart and his only kidney
we had found a few yrs prior he only had one kidney
my son is 24yrs old but has a mind capcity of a 12yr old
hes my baby and pride njoy


when i was 2yrs old
my grandfather had died and a few days after my cousin that was 2moths old had died there funeral was on the same day
my aunt didnt know how to deal with it and she admited herself in the state hospitol for 6months