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Topic: is love dead?
no photo
Thu 07/25/13 01:56 AM
close to 80 percent of marriages end in divorce or some kind of separation. if there truly is love cant something be worked out? even relationships that kicks off wonderful and sweet often ends with heart breaks, infidelity...why why why?

sparkyae5's photo
Thu 07/25/13 07:30 AM
read the book called GETTING THE LOVE YOU WANT and you will find out why.....:smile:

izzyphoto1977's photo
Thu 07/25/13 07:43 AM
Selfishness and basically not willing to work things out. Immaturity is probably another one. So many people get married because they feel pressured to do so. Perhaps getting married to young or for the wrong reasons.

Shy_Emo_chick's photo
Thu 07/25/13 07:48 AM
Not everyone ends up with the lover they want, maybe somewhere close to. Then again, I also see the sense in not settling for less.

If it was as easy as picking your favourite sweets, it would happen more often.

ridewytepony's photo
Thu 07/25/13 08:18 AM
Edited by ridewytepony on Thu 07/25/13 08:19 AM
"cha cha cha changes...turn and face the strange
cha cha cha changes...
time may change me but I can't trace time"
we are like transformers, we form but forever change
i do believe the stats on 80% are based on, within
the first two years of marriage.
people show more of themselves in time as well,
I've often noticed that, the first month is great
then behaviours start comming out, I call it
false advertising.

change is enviable, its just a matter or which
one will be unhappy first.
It seems with some woman, its just like accomplishing
a goal they desperately wanted, then they feel
stagnant in their lives and start looking for the
next conquest.so I think this my apply more to
females that aren't career oriented, or with responsibilities.
(kids) ect
like the ones I usually end up with, as its convenient, when I'm
around.

uche9aa's photo
Thu 07/25/13 09:25 AM
the answer to your question is simple.ungodliness.anybody who doesnt fear God wouldnt respect vows.many mistake lust for love

no photo
Thu 07/25/13 09:31 AM
love takes two...

ohwell

izzyphoto1977's photo
Thu 07/25/13 09:32 AM
I don't fear god. I fear the unknown more than I fear god. But I do respect vows and promises. My word is my bond and god has little to nothing to do with that. Teaching kids to hold up to their end of deals is what needs to be done. Not to fear god. If you fear any one it should be the devil. lol

isaac_dede's photo
Thu 07/25/13 09:36 AM

.... Teaching kids to hold up to their end of deals is what needs to be done.....

Can you explain what you mean by the above, and what it has to do with remaining married/in love?

msmyka's photo
Thu 07/25/13 09:43 AM
80%? Did you just make that up or what?

izzyphoto1977's photo
Thu 07/25/13 09:46 AM


.... Teaching kids to hold up to their end of deals is what needs to be done.....

Can you explain what you mean by the above, and what it has to do with remaining married/in love?


The one dude said something about having to fear god to respect vows. Vows are like a verbal contract. But if a person is taught that they don't have to honor anything when they are young. Why should they think they would have to honor anything as an adult.

I also meant to add that in cases where someone marries a heartless prick that this would not apply. No one should be forced to stay married to a heartless prick.

ridewytepony's photo
Thu 07/25/13 10:32 AM
Edited by ridewytepony on Thu 07/25/13 10:35 AM

80%? Did you just make that up or what?


obviously that is not a stat for the whole world as there are many governments
that won't give out stats like this especially infidelity stats.

however that was the stats that 50% of marriages failed

but 80 % of those 50 % fail within the first two years

that is my memory from aprox 9 years ago.

but I can't tell you if thats North American or just one Country

I now USA is documents on many poles as the highes in infidelity

and Sweden is right there with them, most of easten Europe

is bad also & Russia as it seems there is a big shortage of

men...so thats where all the cougars are, except they call em

Tigeresses ?

I realize that's not your question but...hey ..its free:smile:

isaac_dede's photo
Thu 07/25/13 03:10 PM



.... Teaching kids to hold up to their end of deals is what needs to be done.....

Can you explain what you mean by the above, and what it has to do with remaining married/in love?


The one dude said something about having to fear god to respect vows. Vows are like a verbal contract. But if a person is taught that they don't have to honor anything when they are young. Why should they think they would have to honor anything as an adult.

I also meant to add that in cases where someone marries a heartless prick that this would not apply. No one should be forced to stay married to a heartless prick.

I almost totally agree with you I agree about kids needing to value their word and vows...but then that last part completely negated the argument. What is one's definition of a "heartless prick" or the opposite which would be "heartless biatch" varies widely.
So basically what you are saying is that someone should honor their word, then make a judgement call on when not to honor it...isn't that what we do now?

Who is defining what is and is not heartless?

Is the guy who is never home, always away at his job, however, sends money home, and disappears for weeks on end, and then comes home heartless? only to disappear again for many more weeks? and then comes home?




izzyphoto1977's photo
Thu 07/25/13 04:33 PM




.... Teaching kids to hold up to their end of deals is what needs to be done.....

Can you explain what you mean by the above, and what it has to do with remaining married/in love?


The one dude said something about having to fear god to respect vows. Vows are like a verbal contract. But if a person is taught that they don't have to honor anything when they are young. Why should they think they would have to honor anything as an adult.

I also meant to add that in cases where someone marries a heartless prick that this would not apply. No one should be forced to stay married to a heartless prick.

I almost totally agree with you I agree about kids needing to value their word and vows...but then that last part completely negated the argument. What is one's definition of a "heartless prick" or the opposite which would be "heartless biatch" varies widely.
So basically what you are saying is that someone should honor their word, then make a judgement call on when not to honor it...isn't that what we do now?

Who is defining what is and is not heartless?

Is the guy who is never home, always away at his job, however, sends money home, and disappears for weeks on end, and then comes home heartless? only to disappear again for many more weeks? and then comes home?






Well when I said heartless prick I was meaning for it to be both male and female. Also I was considering heartless prick to be people who are abusive or psycho. Like the girl Dave Foley married who has some disorder where she manipulates people to benefit herself even if it means tearing other people apart. It's a disorder common more so in women and if you watch the show deadly women they mention it a lot on that show.

sociopaths and psychopaths are pretty similar and they might all fit under the umbrella of anti social personality disorders. Not all people with these disorders are evil mind you, meaning violent. But they are people you probably don't want to mess with.

Obviously with men such as the alcoholic who comes home and beats his wife because he has a small dick and is insecure would be a prick that no one should have to stay married to.

I personally think that you are just over thinking and intentionally using a much broader definition on the term heartless prick to make this something more than it is. Trying to cast a wider net perhaps because you feel guilty about how you treated someone in your past. If that is so then that's a demon you have to face on your own or in therapy. I'm done arguing with you over this silliness.

jaded72's photo
Thu 07/25/13 05:29 PM

close to 80 percent of marriages end in divorce or some kind of separation. if there truly is love cant something be worked out? even relationships that kicks off wonderful and sweet often ends with heart breaks, infidelity...why why why?


Please cite your source, and the context of your statement. Thank you.

isaac_dede's photo
Thu 07/25/13 05:30 PM





.... Teaching kids to hold up to their end of deals is what needs to be done.....

Can you explain what you mean by the above, and what it has to do with remaining married/in love?


The one dude said something about having to fear god to respect vows. Vows are like a verbal contract. But if a person is taught that they don't have to honor anything when they are young. Why should they think they would have to honor anything as an adult.

I also meant to add that in cases where someone marries a heartless prick that this would not apply. No one should be forced to stay married to a heartless prick.

I almost totally agree with you I agree about kids needing to value their word and vows...but then that last part completely negated the argument. What is one's definition of a "heartless prick" or the opposite which would be "heartless biatch" varies widely.
So basically what you are saying is that someone should honor their word, then make a judgement call on when not to honor it...isn't that what we do now?

Who is defining what is and is not heartless?

Is the guy who is never home, always away at his job, however, sends money home, and disappears for weeks on end, and then comes home heartless? only to disappear again for many more weeks? and then comes home?






Well when I said heartless prick I was meaning for it to be both male and female. Also I was considering heartless prick to be people who are abusive or psycho. Like the girl Dave Foley married who has some disorder where she manipulates people to benefit herself even if it means tearing other people apart. It's a disorder common more so in women and if you watch the show deadly women they mention it a lot on that show.

sociopaths and psychopaths are pretty similar and they might all fit under the umbrella of anti social personality disorders. Not all people with these disorders are evil mind you, meaning violent. But they are people you probably don't want to mess with.

Obviously with men such as the alcoholic who comes home and beats his wife because he has a small dick and is insecure would be a prick that no one should have to stay married to.

I personally think that you are just over thinking and intentionally using a much broader definition on the term heartless prick to make this something more than it is. Trying to cast a wider net perhaps because you feel guilty about how you treated someone in your past. If that is so then that's a demon you have to face on your own or in therapy. I'm done arguing with you over this silliness.

I'm not over-thinking nor arguing, just pointing out that what your definition of heartless prick is, may differ from someone else's definition(as you just proved) What one person is willing to put up with, is different from what someone else is willing to put up with. Granted I think to many couples give up too quickly and think that the "grass is greener on the other side" and jump right into divorce when the marriage could have been saved, but there are a number of divorces that I do agree with, for various reasons. Some that probably would not fit under what your definition of heartless prick is, but would fit under mine.

SimplicityAtItsBest's photo
Thu 07/25/13 07:15 PM

close to 80 percent of marriages end in divorce or some kind of separation. if there truly is love cant something be worked out? even relationships that kicks off wonderful and sweet often ends with heart breaks, infidelity...why why why?


'That's just the way it is...' - Tupac
sad

bastet126's photo
Thu 07/25/13 07:22 PM
no, but i think the art of courtship, getting to really know someone, has fizzled. people end
up with people who aren't right for them, and more and more relationships come to an end.
love isn't dead. so many have just lost the reasons it should exist in the first place. .

no photo
Thu 07/25/13 07:33 PM
You guys are totally reaffirming my decision to leave my marriage. As if it needed any affirmation.

izzyphoto1977's photo
Thu 07/25/13 08:15 PM
Is love dead? Of course it is. I buried it in my backyard. Or was that a cat? hahaha

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