Topic: Real love? or Crazy?
Socalwoman74's photo
Sat 09/07/13 09:37 PM
I just had a relationship end. In the beginning it was great. Had some bumps in the road than we got married and it lasted 2 months if that. and some abuse was going on..Well it was over that quick and things just got really bad and it ended. The fact that we got married and said our vows I was willing to work on it for better or worse. He on the other hand wasn't willing to change or work on himself. Am I crazy because I wanted him back even though their was abuse physical and mental? my heart is broke so I don't know if I am thinking right lol

no photo
Sat 09/07/13 09:39 PM
Edited by 2KidsMom on Sat 09/07/13 09:40 PM
Crazy...
Some people you have to love from a distance.
Jmo


I have been in a mentally and physically abusive relationship
Alsoflowerforyou

KinBarrie's photo
Sat 09/07/13 09:45 PM
You don't need someone who will abuse you! Find
a man who will treat you right, and get over
that guy, who isn't even worth thinking about.

Too many women have ended up with guys like
that. Neither partner should end up abusing
one another. Toxic, violent relationships are
a waste of time.

All the best of luck!:smile:

no photo
Sat 09/07/13 10:03 PM

I just had a relationship end. In the beginning it was great. Had some bumps in the road than we got married and it lasted 2 months if that. and some abuse was going on..Well it was over that quick and things just got really bad and it ended. The fact that we got married and said our vows I was willing to work on it for better or worse. He on the other hand wasn't willing to change or work on himself. Am I crazy because I wanted him back even though their was abuse physical and mental? my heart is broke so I don't know if I am thinking right lol


You really loved him, and that love was betrayed and misused. I don't think you are crazy, because sadly love does that to people. All you can do now is use this as a lesson, you have that sort of love in your heart, and you now need to put it towards finding someone more deserving of it who will gladly give it back.

A one sided love is not a mutual love, but a heartbreaking one.

no photo
Sat 09/07/13 10:07 PM


I just had a relationship end. In the beginning it was great. Had some bumps in the road than we got married and it lasted 2 months if that. and some abuse was going on..Well it was over that quick and things just got really bad and it ended. The fact that we got married and said our vows I was willing to work on it for better or worse. He on the other hand wasn't willing to change or work on himself. Am I crazy because I wanted him back even though their was abuse physical and mental? my heart is broke so I don't know if I am thinking right lol


You really loved him, and that love was betrayed and misused. I don't think you are crazy, because sadly love does that to people. All you can do now is use this as a lesson, you have that sort of love in your heart, and you now need to put it towards finding someone more deserving of it who will gladly give it back.

A one sided love is not a mutual love, but a heartbreaking one.



Well said

no photo
Sat 09/07/13 10:17 PM
Hey girl ;) I completely understand. I've been there myself. I think you need to let go of any respect (the part that's tricking you into wanting him no matter what) that you have for him. It's clear you still like him, because if you didn't, then I doubt you'd be asking for advice on this. I attended group therapy. It helped quite a bit. You get to make new friends while there, because you all bond when telling each other your problems. It helps bring the whole class together. You don't have to, but it can go a long way in carving out a new life for yourself. Cut off all communication ties with him. And tell your family and friends not to talk about him infront of you. It will go away very gradually, because love normally does. Good luck m'dear :flower:

unsure's photo
Sat 09/07/13 10:34 PM
I am sure that you have heard the saying that love should never have to hurt. I am sure that you are IN love with him BUT if he is abusing you, that is NOT love. If this man is in love with you, he is suppose to be your protector. The sad thing is he is the one that you need protected from.
I would walk away from the situation because it can become deadly. In the end IF you would stay with him, you would end up hating him and maybe someone could get really hurt.
I believe that when women stay with someone that abuses them, they don't feel like they deserve to be loved. I actually wrote a paper on this in Psychology. You have to understand that it will be hard for you to realize that walking away is the best thing for you, but this is one relationship that should never continue!!
I wish you the strength to stay away from this man and realize that you do deserve more. If you find someone that truly loves you, it will be amazing and he will worship you NOT abuse you!!! It never hurts to seek counseling to try to figure out why you want to stay with someone like this!
Good luck and God Bless flowerforyou

pkh's photo
Sun 09/08/13 02:59 AM

Hey girl ;) I completely understand. I've been there myself. I think you need to let go of any respect (the part that's tricking you into wanting him no matter what) that you have for him. It's clear you still like him, because if you didn't, then I doubt you'd be asking for advice on this. I attended group therapy. It helped quite a bit. You get to make new friends while there, because you all bond when telling each other your problems. It helps bring the whole class together. You don't have to, but it can go a long way in carving out a new life for yourself. Cut off all communication ties with him. And tell your family and friends not to talk about him infront of you. It will go away very gradually, because love normally does. Good luck m'dear :flower:
very true I stayed to long and it was close I finally left. Best wishes

SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Sun 09/08/13 05:39 AM
Not crazy, but not real love either. It's a trick of the brain, as you don't want to feel this pain.
I been there as well, abusive relationship. Turned out he was a narcissist (personality disorder). Recently found out there are truckloads of narcissists out there, so chances of ending up with one are quite high, many women become victim of these fruitcakes. (Narcissist are predominantly male).

Anyway, if you find it difficult to work through on your own, it could indeed help to attend group therapy. That way you may also learn why you fell for a man like that, so it won't happen again in the future.

flowerforyou

Rizajune's photo
Sun 09/08/13 05:57 AM
Hi :) You're not crazy, you just love the wrong man who doesnt appreciate your love and effort to fight for your relationship as a couple.

Give more love to yourself!

He's too blind not seeing how lucky he was to have you.

no photo
Sun 09/08/13 06:50 AM
Hi