I wish I could take credit for this, but I got it in an email so I am just going to post it and watch the fur fly

1. You have to be against capital punishment, but support abortion on demand as a means of birth control.

2. You have to believe that businesses create oppression and governments create prosperity.

3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding citizens are more of a threat than nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Iran or Chinese and North Korean communists.

4. You have to believe that there was no art before federal funding.

5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical changes in the earth's climate and more affected by soccer moms driving SUV'S.

6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial, but being homosexual is natural.

7. You have to believe that the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.

8. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th-graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.

9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but PETA activists do.

10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.

11. You have to believe the NRA is bad because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.

12. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.

13. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, George Washington, or Abraham Lincoln.

14. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides are not.

15. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried is because the right people haven't been in charge.

16. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag queens and transvestites should be constitutionally protected, and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.

17. You have to believe that this message is a part of a vast, right-wing conspiracy.

GOD BLESS AMERICA!
Oops, can't do that either!

... thats about the size of it. you forgot the part about how you can worship any body or thing you want unless its Jesus.

i consider myself a liberal but i don't agree with any of it.lol so either i'm wrong or you're full of ****. lol

Shouldn't that be under jokes and funny stories?????

What You Need To Believe In To Be A Good Bush Conserative



1. Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.
2. Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him, and a bad guy when Bush desperately needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.
3. Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is Communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.
4. The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.
5. A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multi-national corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.
6. The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches, while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.
7. If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.
8. A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our long-time allies, then demand their cooperation and money.
9. Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy, but providing health care to all Americans is socialism. HMOs and insurance companies have the best interests of the public at heart.
10. Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.
11. A president lying about an extramarital affair is a impeachable offense, but a president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.
12. Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.
13. The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's driving record is none of our business.
14. Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.
15. Supporting "Executive Privilege" for every Republican ever born, who will be born or who might be born (in perpetuity).
16. What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the '80s is irrelevant.
17. Support for hunters who shoot their friends and blame them for wearing orange vests similar to those worn by the quail.

I agree with some on the list, and theres I don't. I guess that makes me a moderate liberal, aka, an uninformed voter who should not be allowed to vote

I heard that on the radio today, its one of those "you vote the way I tell you or your WRONG!

liberal=democrat?

gardenforge,

I love your post, but the public has spoken. You only got one indifferent, but I got five indifferents. That means I won, right? Or wait, is more better or worse? I'm not sure, I can't find any threads about it and there is nothing about it in the Bible. I don't know what to think, I guess I'll call Rush Limbaugh tomorrow and see if he can tell me what to think about the indifferent rating system.

Yup, it's all about winning!

Hmmmmmmm I don't do "labels" well......what liberal is any or all of these things??? But since you like to put us in a neat little box.......then I can honestly say Im a "Individual"

garden's post was an email...sent as a spoof...it has nothing to do with what honestly defines a liberal...

it could be funnier...but it was obviously a joke


now Kerry's post on the other hand...that had some substance

ya.......kerry's did have alot of substance!!!!

Now.......if we could only get kerry to cut his hair....

I agree with Kingbreeze about Forge's list. Very few apply to how I feel.

KerryO's list, however, hit the nail squarely on the head.

Well the title was 17 ways to be a good liberal, if it doesn't apply and you are a Liberal, then logic dictates you just aren't a GOOD Liberal.

Logically speaking of course...

Gypsy,

Do you know how some men won't take no for an answer and make unsolicited comments about certain attributes in private email that tread the line? Even after you drop some pretty heavy hints in the interest of 'being nice'?

I find your obsession with the length of my hair and your seeming impulsive need to make these sort of remarks similarly creepy. Take the hint, eh?

-Kerry O.

i like long hair. my sister has long hair. my mother has long hair too. yup.

I wish I had long hair

i think your logic is backwards joshyfox. if i represented those types of qualities i would be a ignorant and hypocritical liberal.

I think Garden's post was amusing even if it stretched the party liberal line just a little. It was largely correct.

Kerry's post on the other hand was wrong on many counts and deviated from reality in many respects, in my opinion. So since this is clearly vague I'll take the items to task individually.

1. I don't actually believe that Republicans hate homosexuals, even though Democrats love to say that they do. Even Hillary is not so much hated as her policies are opposed. Not all Republicans are Christians or even believe in God. Probably much like Democrats in that regard.
2. That's just hype. People love to repeat unsubstantiated rumor and exaggerate events to support their position.
3. Cuba stole property belonging to Americans in particular and has been told that resuming relations would depend on restoring that property to their rightful owners.
4. Not all Republicans think we should get out of the UN. Huge numbers in fact support membership. Not all want to enforce the UN sanctions against Iran, some would rather bomb the hell out of them.
5. Some people simply see abortion as something horrible to do to a baby. You can't fault them for their empathy. Multinational companies are always criticized when they do wrong things, both by Republicans and Democrats. Look for instance at the DuPont tragedy in India. Everyone condemned that. Second example, lead in paint on toys from China. Nothing partisan about that uproar.
6. I had been the Democrats that have been slashing military budgets, not the Republicans. I might mention here they also slash national intelligence budgets as well.
7. Keeping Condoms out of schools is not going to prevent sex, but giving them out in school might be seen as promoting sex, so what?
8. Looks like a reference to France. Even France rejected that leader. Clearly he was complicit in some issues regarding Iran anyway.
9. The claim that HMOs and Insurance companies have the best interests of the public at heart is not the point made by the Republican support for the current health care system. The accepted line is that the method of payment supports the system in such a way that our health care system profits and research is supported so that advances in health care can continue. The issue is more complicated than a one-line quip in a post.
10. As far as I know no Republicans support the view that Tobacco's link to cancer is junk science. The global warming gets propaganda on both sides, be your own judge. Creationism in school has been advanced as something to be shown as an opinion held by some, not to be taught without the opposing Darwinian perspective. In that form it is probably a nonissue.
11. People love to say Bush lied, when in fact his statements were backed up by intelligence reports. Nobody mentions that The Plane's created several lies in their opposition with the investigative trip to Nigeria, overlooking some facts and stretching others, clearly with a liberal agenda. Say someone lied enough and some people will believe you. I hardly thing Bush was callous to the death of American soldiers, and obviously there were other issues driving the war against Iraq. As for whether Clinton's offense was impeachable, who gives a damn, It seems he should have known better than to lie about it though. At some point you have to own up to such things if you ever want them to go away. His choice there was kind of stupid.
12. I'm getting tired of this. Censuring might be one of those things covered by the constitution. The final choice here will rest with the Supreme Court. Those guys have a history of being somewhat indifferent to politics, even after being supported for political reasons, one of the good things about our constitution.
13. Who cares about either one.
14. Wasn't it largely the liberals who hijacked Imus and his broadcast career for his simple gaff. Hypocrisy crosses the aisles apparently.
15. I don;t know where that came from. Executive privilege has been supported by every president since WW2.
16. See number 13.
17. Someone has a hunting accident and you want to twist it into some sort of movement? I think this one is rather callous.

Finally, Reference to Gypsy. I thought she was being nice, giving Kerry a compliment for his politics while also showing her preference for a different hair style. Get a grip Kerry, Lots of people have different tastes. Personally I think that hair style went out about a hundred years ago but what do I know.