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Topic: who else is getting frustrated about not getting any message
no photo
Thu 08/04/16 04:11 PM
Edited by Two on Thu 08/04/16 04:43 PM
I can't mention names but there is a young forum poster that wants you to ask about her, so go find her and ask away if you want conversation...

BreakingGood's photo
Thu 08/04/16 07:19 PM
Edited by BreakingGood on Thu 08/04/16 07:20 PM

Link12hh, you sound just like me. I feel exactly as you feel. I've had no luck messaging women here. The best I can hope for is they'll look at my profile and not reply. Ever. Like you, I'm unemployed, on disability and completely lacking the means to get around. Nobody hits on me. The city I live in is worthless for dating or jobs. I've gotten to the point where I've stopped believing there to be any woman for me. I'm almost dead certain there isn't an Asian woman for me otherwise I would have met her by now. I've given up on there being any future for me, there just isn't one. And I get so mad when I see the "celebrities" and their lives, how "madly in love" they are with some other celebrity. I'm terminally ill from all the times the Kardashians end up in the news.

I don't know what to tell you...I'm in no better a position than you and I find it difficult to believe in "love" and "romance". To me, those only happen in books and movies. They never seem to happen in real life because the only thing women want is money, college education and job. They don't care about "love" or finding the man they want to be with. If a guy doesn't have a job, college degrees or money, he is most likely to be ignored by ALL women. And that's where I am. That's why I don't have anyone. And, yeah, I'm a loner, a shut-in for all time. What the f**k else am I supposed to do? There's no job, no opportunity for one. Women are virtually extinct. What would you like for me to do about it? I guarantee, whatever you ask I'll find it undoable. I always do.


Sounds like a perfect time to move. Sounds like you need to get to a big city. There are so many groups that you can join and meets others.

YOU ARE ONLY ALONE IF YOU WANT TO BE, YOU ARE LAZY, OR YOU ARE MENTALLY CHALLENGED!

I had a neighbor in WAY worse condition then you and older. For over 2 years he had a girlfriend. She would drive him all over the place because he didn't have a car. Eventually she gave him a car.

It all about taking charge of your life!

Nobody else will do it for you!

If you believe you are worthless and nobody wants you then you are.

adivorcedone's photo
Thu 08/04/16 07:44 PM
Only scammers want you to go off site right away....something to do with less security and monitoring, I think......so u are an easy target, and more likely to part with your hard earned money....and yes, there is a real Akeem in Nigeria or whatever waiting to get his paws on it...

no photo
Thu 08/04/16 08:45 PM

Only scammers want you to go off site right away....something to do with less security and monitoring, I think......so u are an easy target, and more likely to part with your hard earned money....and yes, there is a real Akeem in Nigeria or whatever waiting to get his paws on it...


Protect yourself!


no photo
Mon 08/08/16 03:49 PM


Link12hh, you sound just like me. I feel exactly as you feel. I've had no luck messaging women here. The best I can hope for is they'll look at my profile and not reply. Ever. Like you, I'm unemployed, on disability and completely lacking the means to get around. Nobody hits on me. The city I live in is worthless for dating or jobs. I've gotten to the point where I've stopped believing there to be any woman for me. I'm almost dead certain there isn't an Asian woman for me otherwise I would have met her by now. I've given up on there being any future for me, there just isn't one. And I get so mad when I see the "celebrities" and their lives, how "madly in love" they are with some other celebrity. I'm terminally ill from all the times the Kardashians end up in the news.

I don't know what to tell you...I'm in no better a position than you and I find it difficult to believe in "love" and "romance". To me, those only happen in books and movies. They never seem to happen in real life because the only thing women want is money, college education and job. They don't care about "love" or finding the man they want to be with. If a guy doesn't have a job, college degrees or money, he is most likely to be ignored by ALL women. And that's where I am. That's why I don't have anyone. And, yeah, I'm a loner, a shut-in for all time. What the f**k else am I supposed to do? There's no job, no opportunity for one. Women are virtually extinct. What would you like for me to do about it? I guarantee, whatever you ask I'll find it undoable. I always do.


Sounds like a perfect time to move. Sounds like you need to get to a big city. There are so many groups that you can join and meets others.

YOU ARE ONLY ALONE IF YOU WANT TO BE, YOU ARE LAZY, OR YOU ARE MENTALLY CHALLENGED!

I had a neighbor in WAY worse condition then you and older. For over 2 years he had a girlfriend. She would drive him all over the place because he didn't have a car. Eventually she gave him a car.

It all about taking charge of your life!

Nobody else will do it for you!

If you believe you are worthless and nobody wants you then you are.


Except, BreakingGood, I CAN'T move. How am I going to move out to another city when I have no money or transportation? I'm not living in the same situation as this neighbor of yours. I don't have anyone to depend on beyond my parents. And they can't help in this case because of their own needs. I don't have a girlfriend that would "give me a car". If only it were that easy.

no photo
Fri 08/26/16 09:08 PM


how far are you willing to go to spend time with someone?
I had a friend from mingle who lived over an hour away. we would take turns making the drive. I got to know his corner of the world, he got to know more about the area around here.

also, you're young and a musician. you meet all kinds of people through music (or hobby or professional interests).
good luck on your search.
in the meantime, enjoy life. you're young and have time to build your future


thanks for the advice
that sounds like great advice and all but unfortunately i'm limited on places i can go, i get around using my bicycle which means i'm stuck going between a 20 mile radius as i have no drivers license, driving experience, or even a car

and i'm currently unemployed,
and given the lack of education that i was deprived of by my teachers back in high school i don't have much employment options either and doubt i would get hired given that most skills
i know were self taught and most places want a degree to prove that my skills mean anything although i wouldn't know if they would make an exception considering i've never actually went in for a job application considering the job applications found online state about having a degree.

most of my skills were self taught or
i learned from observing others and could replicate the task immediately

soldering(self taught)
as well as plumbing repairs(self taught)
electronics repair(self taught), computer repair(self taught)
as well as electrical due to knowledge of color coding(self taught)

i'm also told by others that i have a vast knowledge in physics and quantum physics but that doesn't mean anything to me since i have very little math skills to go along with it.


Sounds to me like it's time for you to get up and get at it. Get your priorities in order. I'm not meaning to be hateful or mean. Just honest. You shouldn't even be thinking about women at this point. You should be thinking about bettering yourself. Getting yourself into a better place. If you have just the basic knowledge of computers, get into a trade school.

Yes, Ride your bicycle to the nearest trade school. And better yourself. You have nothing to offer a prospective relationship. If you want a relationship with a woman, first you need to prove yourself a bread winner. Right now you can't do that. I'm sorry, but this sounds like whining to me. Poor ole pitiful me. Women don't want me. What do you expect? You have no job. No means of transportation and no future.

I'm not trying to brow beat you. I'm trying to motivate you. You can find a way to get it done. It's all in how badly you want it. I've been where you are and worse. If I had to walk to a job at 4:30 in the morning, shoveling horse pucky. If all it did was make me enough money to buy a used moped that would get me to school and back, even if I had to ride it in the dead of winter, I would do it. If that's what it took to get me out of whatever mess I was in. By the way, Women will admire that. Women tend to admire a man that will go after what he wants. And will not stop till he gets it. Especially bettering yourself.

no photo
Fri 08/26/16 09:47 PM

honestly I don't think there's anyone in Bakersfield that's my age that would give me a chance.



I came here looking for something
I couldn't find anywhere else
Hey, I'm not trying to be nobody
I just want a chance to be myself

I've spent a thousand miles of thumbin'
Yes I've worn blisters on my heels
Trying to find me something better
Here on the streets of Bakersfield

Hey you don't know me, but you don't like me
You say you care less how I feel
But how many of you that sit and judge me
Have ever walked the streets of Bakersfield?

Towbar88's photo
Fri 08/26/16 09:54 PM
I don't know about you guys but I use online dating as a tool, one thing I learned if you want to meet people you have to get out in the real world. depending on online dating is not going to help you, you have to really get out there remember you got to get through nods before you get to the yeses. I don't know what the deal is I've met several nice women here and actually went out on dates with them.still seeing a few of them now, but I also get out there and flirt around too in the real world. I just use online dating to increase my chances. and working in a place where there's always a lot of and woman helps too.

Towbar88's photo
Fri 08/26/16 10:20 PM
by the way I don't have a car either but I do have a electric bike, but like one of the guys said here earlier I met lots of women who had cars who did not mind driving me around. or sometimes even spending their hard-earned money on me, you just got to show them that you are worth it.

no photo
Fri 08/26/16 10:36 PM
Wow Towbar I wish I had your powers. Cowboy up and get serious about yourselves. Some good advice here.

no photo
Fri 08/26/16 10:39 PM
In fact I'm thinking about moving where you are.

no photo
Fri 08/26/16 10:41 PM
So what's going on in this thread now? Been too busy with messages to keep up....shocked laugh

Towbar88's photo
Fri 08/26/16 10:50 PM
well buddy I'm in Chicago and I work at a Home Depot in the paint department. more women come to that department than any other department in the store, it's easy work meet lots of women and getting paid for it is a bonus for me.lol

sybariticguy's photo
Fri 08/26/16 11:27 PM

honestly i do try to ask that person something about them specifically but it's kind of difficult when most of the profiles i've been sending messages to actually are left blank which is why is ask simple questions
otherwise i try ask questions in relation to what they said on thier profile,
as for the "what are your hobbies" question
i genuinely do want to know what they like to do in their spare time so as to know if there is something in common that i can relate to
is that so much to ask? i mean i'm just trying to find some common ground i can share with someone

it's not like i'm asking them for their home address or asking them what they do behind closed doors
which would be an a-hole thing to do by the way.
If you are primarily responding to women who don't have much narrative that should be a good indicator that they are not likely going to get in touch as they did not do their job and write a narrative that would elicit the response that would actually work ..The less said the less is there... sorry but photos are used here quite often for nefarious purposes the least of which is to actually meet and greet. I would not suggest limiting my social life to this format and would take a class at Leisure Learning on how to be more assertive and/or also take a class doing something you enjoy and meet others who share your interest and this can lead to a better response opportunity.. regards

Twintidbits24's photo
Sat 08/27/16 05:39 AM



how far are you willing to go to spend time with someone?
I had a friend from mingle who lived over an hour away. we would take turns making the drive. I got to know his corner of the world, he got to know more about the area around here.

also, you're young and a musician. you meet all kinds of people through music (or hobby or professional interests).
good luck on your search.
in the meantime, enjoy life. you're young and have time to build your future


thanks for the advice
that sounds like great advice and all but unfortunately i'm limited on places i can go, i get around using my bicycle which means i'm stuck going between a 20 mile radius as i have no drivers license, driving experience, or even a car

and i'm currently unemployed,
and given the lack of education that i was deprived of by my teachers back in high school i don't have much employment options either and doubt i would get hired given that most skills
i know were self taught and most places want a degree to prove that my skills mean anything although i wouldn't know if they would make an exception considering i've never actually went in for a job application considering the job applications found online state about having a degree.

most of my skills were self taught or
i learned from observing others and could replicate the task immediately

soldering(self taught)
as well as plumbing repairs(self taught)
electronics repair(self taught), computer repair(self taught)
as well as electrical due to knowledge of color coding(self taught)

i'm also told by others that i have a vast knowledge in physics and quantum physics but that doesn't mean anything to me since i have very little math skills to go along with it.


Sounds to me like it's time for you to get up and get at it. Get your priorities in order. I'm not meaning to be hateful or mean. Just honest. You shouldn't even be thinking about women at this point. You should be thinking about bettering yourself. Getting yourself into a better place. If you have just the basic knowledge of computers, get into a trade school.

Yes, Ride your bicycle to the nearest trade school. And better yourself. You have nothing to offer a prospective relationship. If you want a relationship with a woman, first you need to prove yourself a bread winner. Right now you can't do that. I'm sorry, but this sounds like whining to me. Poor ole pitiful me. Women don't want me. What do you expect? You have no job. No means of transportation and no future.

I'm not trying to brow beat you. I'm trying to motivate you. You can find a way to get it done. It's all in how badly you want it. I've been where you are and worse. If I had to walk to a job at 4:30 in the morning, shoveling horse pucky. If all it did was make me enough money to buy a used moped that would get me to school and back, even if I had to ride it in the dead of winter, I would do it. If that's what it took to get me out of whatever mess I was in. By the way, Women will admire that. Women tend to admire a man that will go after what he wants. And will not stop till he gets it. Especially bettering yourself.


Very well said...I as a woman admire these qualities of a hardworking Man...don't fall into self-pity, you will just get worse...but stand up and try all means possible to better yourself....someone, somehow will notice you and you don't even need say a word...they will do the initiative to approach you, so concentrate and focus first on improving yourself and you will see that blessings will just flow...be smart and act smart...you ain't dismembered nor maimed, you can do it, you just have to believe in yourself and go to trade school using your bike, documents are important when you seek for a good job...you just have to know your priorities....and yes, you are still at your prime, so be patient and work your way up....

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