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Topic: Better than me?
Seakolony's photo
Wed 07/27/16 01:31 PM
Have you ever just thought this person is so much better than me because __________________?

Well my sister posted that I was the better sister today and it got me to thinking. There was a time in my life when I asked God, "Why did you take my sister? The third one four years younger than me died at birth. Why didn't you take me? Was she better than me that she didn't have to live through this and I did?

Well this coming from my 8 years younger sister. I had to tell her, I am no better. I have lived longer made more mistakes and learned from them. Life isn't about how many mistakes you have made. Life is about who you become from what you have learned. So I am sure there are stories. But how has this type of thinking at one.point affected your life?

dobermangal's photo
Wed 07/27/16 02:32 PM
I had a guy say he wasn't good enough to date me. I was just more outgoing than him at the time. That was lame and a very long time ago. He is a business owner now. WTF?

no photo
Wed 07/27/16 02:51 PM
Edited by SassyEuro2 on Wed 07/27/16 02:55 PM

Have you ever just thought this person is so much better than me because __________________?

Well my sister posted that I was the better sister today and it got me to thinking. There was a time in my life when I asked God, "Why did you take my sister? The third one four years younger than me died at birth. Why didn't you take me? Was she better than me that she didn't have to live through this and I did?

Well this coming from my 8 years younger sister. I had to tell her, I am no better. I have lived longer made more mistakes and learned from them. Life isn't about how many mistakes you have made. Life is about who you become from what you have learned. So I am sure there are stories. But how has this type of thinking at one.point affected your life?
Geez... Sorry for your pain. I have never thought this way. There is an old play from the 1970's ' My arms are too short to box with God'. That philosphy is my own. ;~) I don't ask God why?

no photo
Wed 07/27/16 03:02 PM

I had a guy say he wasn't good enough to date me. I was just more outgoing than him at the time. That was lame and a very long time ago. He is a business owner now. WTF?
If a guy says ' You are too good for me', believe me you are..... Run! It is probably a manipulation tactic. Or he will treat you the way he sees himself. (if they can't love & be kind to themselves then they can't love & be kind to you') Just consider yourself lucky & call it a 'near miss'

no photo
Wed 07/27/16 03:15 PM
Better than me?

No matter who you are someone is better than you, and you're better than someone else. At least, or especially, if you include the words "at something."

Have you ever just thought this person is so much better than me because __________________?

Sure.
Identifying that someone is better than you should be a motivation, pointing out weaknesses, desires, and realities that should be faced.

If no one is better than any other, then there's really no reason to try to be better at anything.

I had to tell her, I am no better.

Why did you have to tell her?
Why couldn't you accept being a potential role model?
Why not accept the responsibility?
Why did you have to force your beliefs regarding her perceptions on her rather than allow her to believe how she chooses?
Why do you think you're right and she's wrong?
Is she stupid?
Or are you really trying to prove that you are better because you can be humble?

how has this type of thinking at one.point affected your life?

Sometimes positively, sometimes negatively, sometimes it was simply a reaction to a separate way of thinking (e.g. self pity, leading to seek validation of the pity).



msharmony's photo
Wed 07/27/16 03:18 PM
well there is a difference between being better AT something than another

but not being better than another

I always felt we are all equally fallible and therefore equally human


never felt I was better than another person or that they were better than me

Beachfarmer's photo
Wed 07/27/16 03:26 PM
Just recently had a great visit with my Sis.

She did everything "right" (for lack of a better term). However, she is older...the "mistake". I was planned.

I Efed up at every corner growing up but had a spark (which I realize now is BS and only goes so far). I would tease her while she was doing WAY advanced math and say, "You made your *8* backwards." She would fall for that...for a second.....be pissed....but appreciate the distraction.

I'm in awe of my sibling's talents. She calls me "The Golden Child" but sometimes I feel like I have waded through life with cheap banter.

BLAH, BLAH, BLAH....it all comes down to a trite, "Who's to say?"

IgorFrankensteen's photo
Wed 07/27/16 03:31 PM

well there is a difference between being better AT something than another

but not being better than another

I always felt we are all equally fallible and therefore equally human


never felt I was better than another person or that they were better than me


THIS. ^^^

It is the MOST important thing for anyone and everyone to recognize, especially as a part of being an American, and especially in the times we are living through now.

I've not told any women that they are better than me, that I can recall. I may have done, as a part of the adolescent desperate begging days many of us go through, but as an adult, I never have.

I did tell someone once that she was truly out of my league. It was assuredly NOT an attempt at manipulation through flattery, nor was it the depressed ravings of a self-centered drama king. It was a measured analysis of what she had written about herself and what she enjoyed in life, and expected to have as a normal part of dating, which was far above anything I could afford to even TRY to carry on with.

I certainly wasn't going to insult her by even hinting that she was after someone with more money than I had (and therefore might be said by some to be "shallow"), so I said something true: she was out of my league.

Seakolony's photo
Wed 07/27/16 06:20 PM
Edited by Seakolony on Wed 07/27/16 06:21 PM
I think positively to grow and learn you have to face your mistakes and not be repetitive. By inspiring that I had changed inspires that another can too. I was just trying to tell her that I have not always said the right thing the right way. I had to learn to think before I spoke. It's a family trait we could all learn from and try not to repeat.
She just lost her stepson and is going through alot.

Yes I was very young when I thought that. Thank goodness it was eons ago now.

Thank you for your input.

no photo
Wed 07/27/16 07:44 PM
We are all of equal value as a human being.

How ever we are all better or worse when measured against a specific task.
Thankfully because if it wasn't so, there would only be need of one

no photo
Wed 07/27/16 08:36 PM
Edited by dolphin0925 on Wed 07/27/16 08:42 PM
Have you ever just thought this person is so much better than me because __________________?

Recognizing one's capacity or ability is a way of appreciating the good things in a person but comparing oneself to another that you are better or less means competing. All human beings are beautifully made equal in the eyes of God but in every way unique with its own special qualities. One may excel at something but not in everything. We are not super human to do wonders in everything but we can try to do our best to become better. We all have our strengths and weaknesses and it doesn't make us superior or inferior in comparison with anyone. In our lives, we may be a success or a failure but all the things that we experienced are learnings on how to become a better person , BEING YOURSELF, working on being human and become a human being with a purpose NOT BETTER THAN OR WORSE THAN ANYBODY.:smile: flowers flowerforyou

RustyKitty's photo
Wed 07/27/16 09:21 PM
I remember having feelings of superiority in our cliches in high school...but once ya grow up, the grown up world brings us down into reality...
while we can't like everyone, we're not better than the other..
just sayin..

no1phD's photo
Wed 07/27/16 09:26 PM
Looks at himself in the mirror..
And says.. I'm much better than you !
I'm too good for you.!.... I'm leaving you...lol...hmmm.. wait a minute!!

Seakolony's photo
Wed 07/27/16 09:32 PM

Looks at himself in the mirror..
And says.. I'm much better than you !
I'm too good for you.!.... I'm leaving you...lol...hmmm.. wait a minute!!


Good luck with that one whew

jacktrades's photo
Thu 07/28/16 12:20 AM
We are all works in progress, no one is better than anyone else.

Seakolony's photo
Thu 07/28/16 05:57 AM

We are all works in progress, no one is better than anyone else.


Welcome And thank you for your input

UrMissingLib's photo
Thu 07/28/16 11:58 AM
I qoute Bill Gates......Never compare yourself with anybody. It's an insult to yourself.....end of qoute.

That said, I believe we are all WIP. None has it all together. You are good at one thing and not at another. So, we compliment each wherever we are.

The only person you should compare yourself with, or compete with is YOURSELF. Look at yourself in the mirror every evening and ask what value you added to your life as you go to sleep. Life is a continual improvement journey. Not only for our personal satisfaction, but the benefit of those around us....and the world at large.

Just like a fresh water Lake preserves life due to inflow and outflow of water, human beings are an open system. We receive and give to the environment around us, thus we at one point receive value and add value.

Beachfarmer's photo
Thu 07/28/16 03:38 PM
I DO have to say that at times my admiration has broken the plane into envy.

A buddy of mine moved twice. On his second move, he threw out ALL unopened boxes.

Timmy, YOU are my Freegin HERO!

Seakolony's photo
Thu 07/28/16 03:47 PM

I DO have to say that at times my admiration has broken the plane into envy.

A buddy of mine moved twice. On his second move, he threw out ALL unopened boxes.

Timmy, YOU are my Freegin HERO!


My mom got pissed when she came back and found out I had replaced the tiles that were falling apart in the breakfast nook with a remnant. Installed cabinets and turned it into a pantry. I threw our popcorn gift cans rusting away. But they were sentimental. I say poisonous cut wanting a tetanus shot waiting to happen. The closets are stuffed with stuff from the last 40 years and I am like this crochet bikini from the 70s is rotting away mom. Just step away and let go already.

Beachfarmer's photo
Thu 07/28/16 03:56 PM
You had me at crochet bikini love

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