As someone with four brothers and who had a Father I dearly loved. I tend to be unable to be on the extreme feminist side of debates. I tend to try to walk in the shoes of males and imagine the 'what ifs' and 'how would I feel ifs'

That being said, it is worrying to me that so many men are being targeted for mere 'coercion'. The idea of no equals no, to me, is unrealistic. Its like saying 'til death do us part means til death do us part'

the issue is that the way a person feels in one moment could change in the next. No equals 'not this second'. And so we are 'coerced' all the time. I am offered a dish I have not had before and I say 'no, thank you'. To which the host explains how good it is and 'coerces' me to try some. I can still stand on my no, or I can try it. If I try it, Im a pushover, not a victim of some terrible injustice.

If I am at a park and dont want to go on a ride, and say 'no', but my friends insist it will be fun and I go anyway. Im no victim of 'coercion' Im a pushover.

My point is that extremes in dating are unrealistic, and thank goodness for that. It may not be PC, but part of the excitement for many is the idea of the 'chase' and the 'challenge', most things about dating are some form of 'coercing' another person to feel certain ways for and about you.

Many times our initial 'no'(in any situation) is based upon nervousness or ignorance or some sense of moral obligation, but our ACTIONS are based on the reality of how we feel and what we want.

I am wondering how long before we can start excusing 'adulterous' men because they said 'no' but the female 'coerced' them. Will they become victims who can share the #metoo mantra? Will those women be demonized for not understanding "no equals no"?

I do not count physical force or threat of violence or unemployment as mere 'coercion'. But simple verbal arguments to try to convince are nowhere in the same ball park and part of life.

Do you think being 'coerced' makes one a victim or a pushover?

in guys defense on this, there's a lot of women who are in to being "coerced", but (imo) it ruins the experience if they have to explain it first...guys aren't real smart and can't always understand what they want or when to cut back...

Coercion is the practice of persuading someone to do something by using force or threats.
To me, it is a form of rape.

Persuade is to cause (someone) to do something through reasoning or argument. Cause (someone) to believe something, especially after a sustained effort. Provide a sound reason for (someone) to do something.

There is nothing 'mere' about coercion.

We are persuaded to change our minds, act, not act all the time.
The whole advertising industry is based on persuasion.
The term 'sheeple' is defined by the ability of a few to persuade many.

Personally, I think relationship persuasion is more of an enlightening having strong influences of
Provide a sound reason for (someone) to do something.

Coercion is manipulation. Personally, I'm not interested in forcing anyone to love me. To hell with all the games. Its much easier to just be honest and accept the outcome.

persuasion then ....

persuasion then ....

IMO until there is proof, they are innocent

As a victim, I know how hard legit claims are because of false claims

The whole I'm a push over things what got my attention and extremist using extreme words for effect (attention) and down playing them for the lesser similar words with about the same meaning but not as harsh.
I agree with toms response